The Morning Dialog

Who? Me?

Who? Me?

CNN reports that Hair Furer is making friends and influencing people:

…The New York Daily News had reported in 2006 that Trump had told an audience at a Learning Annex convention speech, “Condoleezza Rice, she’s a lovely woman, but I think she’s a bitch. She goes around to other countries and other nations, negotiates with their leaders, comes back and nothing ever happens.”

Deadspin first resurfaced the New York Daily News story on Tuesday. When asked if she had any response to the New York Daily News report of Trump’s remarks, Rice simply wrote back, “Exactly. Can’t wait until November 9!”

We note that even a broken clock is correct twice a day.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo | 6 Comments

Ocean’s Election

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo | 3 Comments

This Exists

Last night we gave you a Rubik’s cube for your Facebook Rage Uncle, and tonight we present one for your smarty-pants nephew! Yes, a 7×7 Rubik’s Cube will shut up the little bastard.

Posted in snark | 4 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs

The Republican Party Takes Flight

The Republican Party Takes Flight

In a press release-as-a-public-service-announcement Americans for Legal Immigration PAC (ALIPAC, tag line: Leading the fight against illegal immigration and amnesty!, yes exclamation mark included) warns Trump supporters that the libruls under their beds are out to get ’em:

(Raleigh, NC) Americans for Legal Immigration PAC is demanding that Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton speak out against the rising wave of violence their supporters are directing at Republicans, conservatives, Trump supporters, and American police officers following the firebombing of the GOP headquarters in Hillsborough, NC.

More and more reports are coming in of police officers being shot by criminals that support Obama, Hillary Clinton, the Democratic Party, BLM, etc… These shootings and violent attacks on Trump supporters, Trump signs, Trump supporter vehicles, and now a GOP Headquarters in Hillsborough, North Carolina are being fostered and encouraged by the hateful rhetoric coming from some members of the media, the Obama administration, and left wing George Soros funded organizations that are demonizing non-leftists.

ALIPAC is a national organization based in North Carolina about 30 minutes from where the Firebombing occurred! The organization has endorsed Donald Trump due to his pledge to enforce America’s existing border and immigration laws which is what ALIPAC’s platform (view) has encouraged since 2004.

“Civil Rights do not exist or matter in America unless everyone’s rights are protected including Republicans and Donald Trump supporters,” said William Gheen, President of ALIPAC. “This firebomb attack is the latest violent attack directed at those that support Trump. In the last few weeks, we’ve seen videos of a young man beaten by a mob for wearing a Trump hat and a woman beaten in her own yard defending her Trump sign. The fact that Obama and Hillary’s Justice Department is silent on these violent attacks on American Civil Rights implies consent! These attacks are being encouraged by the false and derogatory rhetoric of politicians and organizations. We call on Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton to call on all of their supporters to immediately end their attacks on Trump supporters and American police officers!”

ALIPAC is advising all Donald Trump supporters to take advantage of early voting to avoid the potential chaos, violence, and Civil Rights violations that are likely at the polls on Nov 8 when leftists groups like La Raza, SEIU, BLM, anarchists, and the New Black Panthers plan to be at the polls to confront and intimidate Trump voters.

Projection: how does it work?

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo | 9 Comments

Trump TeeVee Pop Quiz!


Rudy Giuliani has natural good looks for television

OK, Scissorheads, you’ve been asking for a Pop Quiz in re: Trump TeeVee, but we’re gonna mix it up a little. Because we know Trump names everything after himself, well, the Trump News Network seems like a forgone conclusion.

That said, the REAL snark-a-palooza is going to be around the programming of TNN. So here’s your Quiz:

Name the three prime-time shows you expect to see on Trump News Network, and (if appropriate) who will star in them. Example:

6:00 PM Brown-Nosing with Sean Hannity
7:00 PM Russia’s Funniest Home Videos with Vladimer Putin
8:30 PM Prepping! With Rudy Giuliani

Alternate Quiz:

Describe a pilot show for TNN and who it will star. Example:

Make Room for Donnie: Donald Trump learns about Ivanka’s friendship with Huma Abedin; Melania goes on a shopping spree for her pussy cat; the boys grow Hitler mustaches.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Pop Quiz! | 28 Comments

Your Midday Palate Cleanser

Can this marriage be saved?

I bet the TV remote is broken at their house.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Purplehead)

Posted in cats, Palate Cleansers | 3 Comments

‘And let’s dispel once and for all with this fiction…’

…that L’il Marco is a robot:

Oh. Never mind.

Posted in Marco 'Big Gulp' Rubio, NeoCons | 3 Comments

It’s NOT a Circus

Thank god the porn industry hasn’t released their It’s Not A Circle-Jerk response.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo | 2 Comments

New, Republican FanFic

Wingnuttia’s own Secure America Now presents the first of what is alleged to be a series of tourism ads depicting the world after The Hilderbeast fails to defeat ISIS:

This is offensive on so many levels, but really, why the obsession with France? We thought that they were claiming that there were Sharia no-go zones all over London.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo | 3 Comments

The Company You Keep, Part Infinity

David Duke writes…

“Thank God Trump has emerged and embraced my issues such as stopping immigration, fair trade not free trade, and America First. I will be the most outspoken voice in the Senate. Nothing could have more impact than to send me to the Senate!” Duke says in the letter, adding that he would work to preserve “our heritage” if elected.

So when the most well-known racist running for office today lashes himself to Hair Furer Donald Trump so enthusiastically, well, what conclusions do YOU draw?

Once again we state: not all Republicans are racists. But if you are a racist, you probably are a Republican.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, David Duke, Hair Furer, Donald Trump, Racism, The New Confederacy | 1 Comment