The Death of the Media, Cont.

Breaking News!As regular readers and all good Scissorheads know, I don’t watch Morning Joe (Squint and the Meatpuppet) for a wide variety of reasons, but mostly because I don’t want to encourage MSNBC to give even more airtime to this Republican Stooge and his yes men. And also because if I really want the Republican Talking Points of the day, I could go to the RNC website or even (gasp!) set my dial to Junkie Limbaugh.

So with that as background, I am grateful to the good bloggers who do pay attention to what Squint says/does. Steve M over at No More Mister Nice Blog has a post up in which we are alerted that Squint actually corrects the record of something that he initially let Vulgarmort get away with saying:

So Bravo to Squint!

But then Steve M notices that so much more was wrong and MSNBC Joe went back to carrying water for Trump. It’s a great read and it returns us to one of my favorite points: If the Corporate Media had as much integrity as the Left Blogtopia, Morning Joe would be off the air and Steve M. would have a media gig, or Driftglass, or even us (though ours would be much more likely to be some equivalent of the Gong Show, I suppose).

It’s just maddening that these inside-the-beltway buffoons will not correct the lies that their guests tell for fear of losing access.

Anyway, go read No More Mister Nice Guy. It’s a great piece of media criticism.

Posted in Death of the Media, media, Morning NO! | 3 Comments

The Midday Palate Cleanser


“Oh, please. Domestic Prosciutto?”

Posted in cats, Palate Cleansers | 2 Comments

Some Fries With Your Stupid, Donald?

Trump addresses his followers.

Trump addresses his followers.

I was wondering how the doomed jetliner was going to become a topic for Vulgarmort, and now we know:

“The fact that Hillary thinks the temporary Muslim ban, which she calls the “Muslim ban”, promotes terrorism, proves Bernie Sanders was correct when he said she is not qualified to be President.

“Look at the carnage all over the world including the World Trade Center, San Bernardino, Paris, the USS Cole, Brussels and an unlimited number of other places. She and our totally ignorant President won’t even use the term Radical Islamic Terrorism. And by the way, ask Hillary who blew up the plane last night – another terrible, but preventable tragedy. She has bad judgement and is unfit to serve as President at this delicate and difficult time in our country’s history.”

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Hair Furer, Donald Trump | 3 Comments

He Seems Nice, Part Infinity

Our theocratic man-crush tells us today why Hillary Clinton should be put to death:

“She turned me into a newt!”

Posted in snark | 11 Comments

Ah, Texas!

The U.S. Lab for Bad Policy

The U.S. Lab for Bad Policy

The Republican Party of Texas official plank seems to call most Texans gay:

“Homosexuality is a chosen behavior that is contrary to the fundamental unchanging truths that has been ordained by God in the Bible, recognized by our nations founders, and shared by the majority of Texans.”

Commas: how do they work?

UPDATE: Scissorhead Pupienus Maximus gets to the gritty, red-lined copy editor take on this very important story:

The august magazine blames that Oxford comma there at the end for the confusion, but we asked our aforementioned (and heroic) copy editors where the real problem was and they zeroed in on the verb “has.” It’s singular, so the rest of the sentence ends up referring to the noun “behavior” instead of “truths.”

Apologies to Pup-Max for the eff-up.

Posted in Crazeee States, Homophobia, Texas | 9 Comments

With Friends Like This, Chris Christie Doesn’t Need Enemies

White on the Inside and Outside.

White on the Inside and Outside.

Vulgarmort doesn’t just pick on his enemies, he picks on his friends, too:

Believe it or not, that was at a fundraiser for Christie.

Posted in Chris 'Traffic Cones' Christie, Hair Furer, Donald Trump | 3 Comments

Today in Impeachment News

Black Hat! He Must Be The Bad Guy!

Black Hat! He Must Be The Bad Guy!

Oklahoma (Motto: Texas Without The Charm) wants to impeach the Kenyan Usurper for protecting transgender students:

SCR 43 requests Oklahoma’s U.S. Representatives “to file articles of impeachment against the President of the United States, the Attorney General of the United States, the Secretary of Education,” it reads. The resolution goes on to call for the impeachment of “any other federal official liable to impeachment, who has exceeded his or her constitutional authority with respect to the letter referenced in this resolution.”

That letter of course being the guidance instructing public schools to not discriminate against trans students.

Their right to call for the impeachment of the President and his Cabinet Secretaries, they believe, is “based upon the grounds that the Constitution of the United States does not grant the executive branch of the federal government any authority whatsoever over the public education system, nor over the use of restrooms or other facilities thereof.”

Just thought we should mention this again: to date, no one has been accosted by a trans person in a bathroom anywhere. But you know who has been accosted and by whom?

Despite all those transgender bathroom laws GOP state legislatures keep passing, a child is far more likely to be molested at church.

In 2014 the US Conference of Catholic Bishops (USCCB) came out with a report on sexual abuse in the Catholic church. It turns out that from 1950-2013, 17,259 victims made accusations and 6,427 clerics had been counted as “not implausibly” or “credibly” accused. This doesn’t even account for underreporting or include the unusually large number victims who came forward in 2003 in the wake of the Boston Globe‘s eye-opening report on sexual abuse in the Catholic church by their Spotlight team…

But them’s Catholics, ammiright? Nawt Gawd-fearin’ real Xristians!

Meanwhile, for all of their yammering about gay marriage and public restrooms, evangelical protestant churches also have a lot to answer for. In 2015, the exposure of 19 and Counting‘s Josh Duggar’s sexual proclivities revealed not only that America’s favorite Christian family wasn’t as wholesome as they seem (and that their faith community helped enable him). In February, the Washingtonian broke a story revealing decades of sexual abuse against children in Sovereign Grace Ministries, a suburban megachurch network.

Posted in Crazeee States, Homophobia, Impeach, Oklahoma, transphobia, Your Kinda Cannot Pee Here | 6 Comments

Tom Cotton: Statistically You Must Be A Criminal

Folks is dumb where I come from...

Folks is dumb where I come from…

And what stupid thing is cake-eating uncouth jug-eared Senator Tom Cotton (R-Tehran) saying now?

“Take a look at the facts. First, the claim that too many criminals are being jailed, that there is over-incarceration, ignores an unfortunate fact: for the vast majority of crimes, a perpetrator is never identified or arrested, let alone prosecuted, convicted, and jailed,” Cotton said during a speech at The Hudson Institute, according to his prepared remarks. “Law enforcement is able to arrest or identify a likely perpetrator for only 19 percent of property crimes and 47 percent of violent crimes. If anything, we have an under-incarceration problem.”

Well, I’m going out on a limb, but my guess is that Cotton failed the concepts behind statistics and set theory.

Yeah. Freedom-loving America has more people locked up than godless China, and he wants to lock up more people? I’m sure he has a list that he could sing to us in the key of dog-whistle.

“I saw this in Baghdad. We’ve seen it again in Afghanistan,” recalled Cotton, who served in the Army during both wars. “Security has to come first, whether you’re in a war zone or whether you’re in the United States of America.”

This moron thinks we are a war zone?

He confuses being tall with having depth.

Posted in People Dumber than Dolphins, Tom Cotton | 7 Comments

The Morning Quote

The Death of the Media

Petunia and Pals Wins The Morning!

Petunia and Pals Wins The Morning!

Tiger Beat on the Potomac (thanks Charlie!) shows us how Fox and Friends leads the witness (or witless in this case):

“Don’t you think he — [Hillary Clinton] is saying I’m going to put [Bill] in charge of that because people like him more than they like her?” Doocy asked.

“Well, maybe she’s saying that or maybe she just wants him around the White House so she can keep her eye on him,” Trump said.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Death of the Media, Hair Furer, Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, Petunia and Pals, Tiger Beat in the Potomac | 1 Comment

Bad Ads, Cont.


She doesn’t need courage, she needs a dark hallway, quiet sneakers, a polo mallet, and a rusty tin can lid, and to creep up on the copywriter for that ad. And then she’ll have all the balls she will ever need.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Bruce388)

Posted in snark | 7 Comments