Presented Without Comment

OK, I lied, one comment:

(Hat tip: Scissorhead D-Cap)

Scissorhead Lockwood has a comment:

Laughed my ass clean off.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Hair Furer, Donald Trump | 13 Comments

When Sisterhood Was In Flower

War on Women/Death of the Media

War on WomenI am old enough to recall when ’90s lefty feminist icon Camilla Paglia was a thing, and her lady-crush/obsession with Madonna was both funny and kinda sketchy-stalking. At the time (if memory serves), she had no bigger villain in her sites than Bill ‘He Done Her Wrong’ Clinton.

So imagine my surprise to see 20 years later that Paglia has revived her feminist career by being the now right-wing feminist who hates women:

“And is there anything creepier than that current Hillary meme, the campaign slogan “I’m with her”? The blurred borderlines of those pronouns (“I” numbly dissolving into “her”) and that ambiguous preposition (“with” her like a child, a lover, or a nurse’s aide with a geriatric patient?) are close to pathological. The Hillary acolytes are joined at the hip to “her”, the Great Leader Who Needs No Name, the Maternal Tit daubed in wormwood, the bitter toxin left by men—those spoilers of the universe who created the master structures of modern civilization that provide us put-upon gals with jobs, transportation, abundant food, clean water, housing, electricity, and a magical disease-spurning municipal sewage system that only men seem required to clean and repair.”

She seems nice, in an unhinged sort of way. I have no idea what her screed means, but I’m told that Paglia is too smart for the common man to grasp (and no one is more common than I). But I do get the gist of it. Paglia is the feminist Phyllis Schlafly could love.

This is not new turf for Paglia; as I was trying to fact-check my statement of Paglia’s previous support of Hillary Clinton lo those many years ago, I discovered that she was hating HRC as recently as the 2008 election and working her way up to today’s unhinged frenzy.

(Paglia also has changed her mind about Madonna, and it’s both agist and sexist. Paglia is mining new territory in feminism.)

Just for shits and giggles, here’s Paglia in 2015 having a calm, reflective discussion about Hillary Clinton with Reason TV’s Nick Gillespie:

Anyway, good job Salon. You really know how to pick ’em.

Posted in sexism, Shallow graves for shallow people, War on Women | 6 Comments

Sen. Collins, Principled Republican Speaks

Trump's GOP

Trump’s GOP

And now Maine’s Senator Susan Collins shows us the principled, conservative thought process in process:

“I have always supported the Republican nominee for president, and I suspect I would do so this year, but I do want see what Donald Trump does from here on out. I hope he will take the kind of steps that I said, I hope that he will knock off the—”

The host asked what [Maine Republican Sen. Susan Collins] Collins would do if Trump couldn’t stop his antics. Collins responded she didn’t think that would happen.

So really, what is she waiting for? What does this mean? She wants details on how he will:

  • deport all undocumented immigrants (link goes to a conservative think tank who says this would crater the domestic economy.)
  • build that absurd wall with the gorgeous door and have Mexico pay for it
  • ban all Muslims from the U.S. (though current Muslims can stay, with a YUGE target on their backs, amiright?)
  • waterboard (and worse) prisoners
  • target the families of terrorists
  • balance the budge AND reduce taxes by $1 trillion per year
  • start a trade war with China

The devil is in the details, eh Sue? Jeebus, some people.

I’m sure the details on how Trump plans to do these things will sway the principled Senator to support him and his agenda.

What she is trying to do is to split the baby: she’s telling her moderate constituents that she’s not the goose-stepping, get-in-line Republican, AND she’s telling the goose-steppers that she’s not going to vote against him.

She’s better at this than Traitor Joe, though. Gotta give her credit.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Hair Furer, Donald Trump, Wingnuttia | 6 Comments

Pundits: Let Us Count The Ways You Got It Wrong

I read the news today, oh boy.

I read the news today, oh boy.

There are a couple of interesting bits up today that sort of call for pundit accountability in the face of the rise of Vulgarmort to the top of the Republican ticket. This feels like a strange moment in the Death of the Media that they actually look inwards.

Tiger Beat on the Potomac takes the rare (for them) format of actually naming the people who got it wrong, and it kicks off with my favorite of the big fails:

And of course, Almost Always Wrong Bill Kristol:

Weekly Standard editor Bill Kristol long pushed for the formation of a third party or independent challenger to Trump as the mogul continued his meteoric rise before and during the primary process. By the winter solstice, Kristol was soliciting party names for “the new party we’ll have to start if Trump wins the GOP nomination.”

Speaking to ABC, where he is a contributor, Kristol deemed the tweet “semi-serious.”

“I don’t think Trump will be the nominee, so I don’t expect it to be an issue,” Kristol said. “But since I don’t think I could support Trump, and I’d like to have someone to vote for, if Trump were to be the nominee, I’d be open to a new party, probably for 2016 only — but you never know.”

Anyway, TBOTP categorizes the many failings of the media into 9 categories of wrong, and oddly omit anything that they themselves said (assuming that they said anything at all).

And Business Journal has a take-down of data-driven Nate Silver who famously told everyone to calm down, it won’t be Trump. And then his mea culpa:

“Other than being early skeptics of Jeb Bush, we basically got the Republican race wrong.”

…and

“Unprecedented events can occur with some regularity.”

Oh. Well that explains it.

And again, who got it right? Yup, the Liberal Bloggers, who do not live in the Village, and who have for decades commented on the tribal quality of Y’all Qaeda, The New Confederacy, and Wingnuttia in general; of course Possum Holler was going to go with a winner like Trump and not the losers. They’d vote for a cartoon character like Trump in a heartbeat.

And up next: the Media will start to normalize Trump and Possum Holler will go along with it. And then the media will ask what went wrong? Just look at the Chimpy years. It’s the same damn pattern.

The Media needs to get out more. Of course, no one is going to fire Ross Douthat, Bill Kristol, or Nate Silver, so it really doesn’t matter much how wrong they are; and likewise, no one is going to hire liberal bloggers to be front pagers.

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Hair Furer, Donald Trump, media, Talentless Hacks | 15 Comments

Your Daily Noot

Newticles-and-Calli-eye-swap

Staff-banging serial-adulterer Newticles continues his campaign to be Vulgarmort’s Vice Preznint:

“He’s been so creative, and he does things so differently, and he will be so dominant, that we have to figure out how we build around him. This is not a collective where you sit down and have a planning team. This is one, singular person who is the Steve Jobs of modern politics. And he is going to drive the system.”

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Hair Furer, Donald Trump | 9 Comments

The Morning Quote

Don't be the news, Chris.

Don’t be the news, Chris.

Tweetie:

During the network’s coverage of Donald Trump’s Indiana primary victory speech, MSNBC’s Chris Matthews was caught on a live microphone commenting on the appearance of Melania Trump, the Republican nominee’s wife.

“Did you see her walk? Runway walk. My God is that good,” Matthews said.

It appeared that the 70-year-old “Hardball” host wasn’t aware his comments were being broadcast. “I could watch that runway show,” he added.

He’s 70 and he still needs cold showers?

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Hair Furer, Donald Trump, media, sexism, Talentless Hacks, Tweetie | 10 Comments

GOPer Starts 5-Year Plan

happy goatBen Sasse kicks off The 2020 Goat Rodeo:

AN OPEN LETTER TO MAJORITY AMERICA
TO: Those who think both leading presidential candidates are dishonest and have little chance of leading America forward:

BOTH SIDES!

(…or, stated more simply)

TO: The majority of America:

Note: If you are one of those rare souls who genuinely believe Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are honorable people – if they are the role models you want for your kids – then this letter is not for you. Instead, this letter is for the majority of Americans who wonder why the nation that put a man on the moon can’t find a healthy leader who can take us forward together.

BOTH SIDES!

I want to tell you about four unsolicited conversations from the Fremont Wal-Mart this morning…

As gawd is my waitress, Dude is kicking off a 2020 Goat Rodeo campaign.

Posted in 2020 Goat Rodeo | 8 Comments

This Exists

Star Wars Nite Lite

Yes, more Star Wars Nightlights! Never stub your toe in the dark side of the force again!

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Osirisopto)

Posted in Bad Presents | 2 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs

Gene Wilder in bed with a sheep

In Linda Harvey’s best-worst dreams

Boycott Queen Linda Harvey, writing in BarbWire (the Blog-like thingy of Matt Barber, the man who only thinks about hot, sweaty man-on-man sex with thighs like pistons that can pump all night), takes aim at the Holiday Inn. You see, they allowed a BDSM conference:

Let’s say you’re a family traveling through suburban Cleveland this week, and you opt to stay at the Holiday Inn Cleveland-South in Independence.

You might want to think again if you learn about the CLAW convention held there April 28 to May 1. The co-host hotel was the nearby Embassy Suites–Rockside. CLAW stands for “Cleveland Leather Annual Weekend.”

These are sado-masochists, as in whips, chains, handcuffs– you get the picture. And body fluids.

Careful, Linda, you are getting a little breathless.

CLAW featured private workshops teaching the most depraved human activities imaginable short of murder. CLAW appeals mostly to homosexual males who are so lost, they employ bondage, spanking, role playing as slaves or animals, and dabbling in human waste products as the core activity of intimate relationships with other humans.

…she moaned:

After these workshops, just imagine the follow-up sexual acts that surely took place in the privacy of rooms – rooms occupied the next night by your 5 and 7-year-old children or grandchildren.

I bet she is thinking about it as she reaches for the ol’ shower massager.

It goes on for a lot longer than her usual columns, so she kinda gives away her titillation (see what I did there?), and then choses to catalog workshops at the convention (probably the ones she really wanted to attend?), which shall we say gives us an insight into her mind.

I’m sure this is like other trade associations and conferences we’ve all been to, just the focus is more interesting; what’s going on in those hotel rooms is vendor storage for the next day’s events and sales, not sexxy-time with whips and chains and great danes.

Linda, the real action is happening at the hotel bar as salespeople try to schmooze new accounts, but it could be dental equipment as easily as it is latex cat suits, or even CPAC tee shirts. It wouldn’t be any different.

Capitalism is many things, but it is never sexy.

Posted in snark | 11 Comments

David Duke: ‘We Expect Trump To Be Our White Knight’

Donald Trump on Dancing With The Stars!

Donald Trump on Dancing With The Stars!


Hey Republicans, you built this:

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, David Duke, Hair Furer, Donald Trump, The New Confederacy | 6 Comments