Category Archives: Zombie Attacks

Fair Warning: Zombie-Eyed Granny Starver Spotted in DC

Posted on August 20, 2019 by

Tiger Beat on the Potomac (thanks Charlie!) morning email thingie alerts us: “Paul Ryan moving his family to Washington from Wisconsin”: “Paul Ryan is moving his family to the city he was always giddy to leave. “The former speaker of … Continue reading →

Posted in Zombie Attacks, Zombie-eyed Granny-starving | 12 Comments

The Legend of ZEGS: The Paul Ryan Documentary!

Posted on December 20, 2018 by

“I’m not one of these big ego, legacy guys” …says future-former Speaker of the House Paul Ryan in a tax-payer funded, six-part Twitter docu series on his legacy. Twenty years before it became law, tax reform was just an idea. … Continue reading →

Posted in snark, Zombie Attacks, Zombie-eyed Granny-starving | 7 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Posted on July 27, 2018 by

Happy Hour News Briefs Did you really think this thru, Ken? https://t.co/KFfJ6sPDlq — Tengrain the Covfefe Boy (@Tengrain) July 27, 2018 And he’s still a man-without-a-coat! On the brite side, we now have our Gym Jordan picture should he somehow … Continue reading →

Posted in Gym Jordan, Social Media, Twitter, Zombie Attacks | 4 Comments

Local Wonk Not Good At Job

Posted on July 13, 2018 by

We are not amused that Paul Ryan, the Zombie-eyed Granny-starver Speaker of the House doesn’t know how the gubmint works, specifically how a bill becomes a law. You see, for whatever reason ZEGS says that there is nothing Congress can … Continue reading →

Posted in snark, Zombie Attacks, Zombie-eyed Granny-starving | 5 Comments

Local Wonky Genius Isn’t Wonky Or Genius, Probably Not Local Either

Posted on June 22, 2018 by

Speaker of the House Paul Ryan—the dreamy blue-eyed favorite of our failed media—has failed again! You see, ZEGS has been trying to head off at the pass a revolt in the House over immigration that might result in something less … Continue reading →

Posted in 2018 Pie Fight, immigration, Zombie Attacks, Zombie-eyed Granny-starving | 10 Comments

Breaking: Paul Ryan Lies Again

Posted on May 23, 2018 by

Yesterday, the House passed a bill that rolls back a large chunk of Dodd-Frank, the YUGE financial reform bill that gave banks new rules to try to prevent another massive financial meltdown like the banks destroyed the world’s economy during … Continue reading →

Posted in Bankster Bastards, Bastards, Zombie Attacks, Zombie-eyed Granny-starving | 6 Comments

The Big Screw Is Coming

Posted on May 16, 2018 by

I guess that last night’s primaries, which didn’t break consistently for the Dims, suddenly got The GOP’s attention. “THIS ELECTION IS STEALABLE,” Ryan didn’t yell! “Woot-woot!,” he added. Paraphrasing, of course. Breaking right now (according to Tiger Beat’s morning email … Continue reading →

Posted in 2018 Pie Fight, Wingnuttia, Zombie Attacks | 1 Comment

Because We Love a Good Retraction

Posted on May 3, 2018 by

Tiger Beat on the Potomac tell us that recently resigned House Chaplain Pat Conroy is rescinding his resignation, opting to stay in his position through the end of this Congress. Hey, if Congress can have a take-backsy on $11B Ameros … Continue reading →

Posted in Ayn Rand's Grave, Zombie Attacks, Zombie-eyed Granny-starving | 6 Comments

Paul Ryan You’re Fired’ed The Chaplain!

Posted on April 27, 2018 by

Eddie Munster’s evil twin, PX90 enthusiast Paul Ryan of granny-starving fame, has once again poked his nose out of Galt’s Gulch and done his mistress’ bidding: he fired Reverend Patrick Conroy, who was the House chaplain since 2011. It’s no secret … Continue reading →

Posted in Zombie Attacks, Zombie-eyed Granny-starving | 8 Comments

I’d Ask For A Rewrite

Posted on April 19, 2018 by

If this were an episode of anything less than Benny Hill, I’d send it back for a rewrite: HEWITT: “If one of these bigs, like if Jeff Bezos, who’s a pretty smart guy, comes in and says hey, Mr. Speaker, … Continue reading →

Posted in Ayn Rand's Grave, Feast of Saint Ronnie, Zombie Attacks | 5 Comments