Category Archives: The Illuminati are comin’ to getcha

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs Our new pal, conspiracy theorist Paul Begley, whom you might not be surprised to learn is a Xristian Pastor of some sort, is only asking the difficult questions: Did Illuminatti Assassins use a heart-attack gun to … Continue reading

Posted in Conspiracy Theorists, Paul Begley, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha, Xristian Xraxies | 8 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs Pastor Paul Begley wants us to know that the Illuminatti killed Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain: “Why, during the 66th annual meeting of Bilderberg, how come this stuff is happening?” he asked. “How did Kate Spade … Continue reading

Posted in The Illuminati are comin' to getcha | 2 Comments

What’s Up, Illinois Republicans?

Man, Illinois is giving the Crazee State Contest a run for the money, or the Republicans there anyway. Besides the actual Nazi running for congress, the Republicans have nominated a 911-Truther/Birther/Illuminati enthusiast for another seat! Play to your strengths, says … Continue reading

Posted in Conspiracy Theorists, Crazeee States, Illinois, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha | 1 Comment

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs The Sheila Zilinksy Conspiracy Hour does not disappoint, as her guest Steve Quayle alerts us to the latest threat from the Illuminati who are coming to get ya! Got that? There are 9M Xristians scheduled to be … Continue reading

Posted in Sheila Zilinsky, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha, Theocrats, Xristian Xraxies | 16 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs Our newest gal pal conspiracy theorist Liz Corkin goes totally deep, you know, like into IQ and whatnot, and celebrities because …they are PEDOPHILES!!1!  THEY ARE WEARING PIZZA THINGIES!!1!

Posted in Conspiracy Theorists, The Freemasons, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha | 8 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs Once again, we go to the deep well of crazy and we quaff deeply from Liz Crokin’s strange conspiracies: Got that? Agents at CAA (Creative Artists Agency) are literal cannibals. Illuminati cannibals. Literal baby-eating, blood-drinking, Illuminati … Continue reading

Posted in Conspiracy Theorists, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha | 1 Comment

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs We present an InfoWars comedy in two acts. 1) From a tweet earlier today, since deleted: 2) And now, the latest, after the sell-off: It GOES RIGHT TO THE TOP, SHEEPLE!!1!

Posted in Conspiracy Theorists, Globalists and the New World Order, People Dumber than Dolphins, That Bastard George Soros, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha | 2 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs It really feelz like Liz Grokin arrived out of nowhere and now is in the pole position for being our favorite nutty conspiracy theorist for 2018. Today’s exhibit(s) shows us that ol’ Liz could give Alex … Continue reading

Posted in Geeks and Freaks, Jump for Jeebus, Sex fiends, The Freemasons, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha, Xristian Xraxies | 9 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs And now it can be told: The Kenyan Usurper was off having gay sex in a hotel somewhere the night of Benghazi: Coach Dave’s guest is Firehouse Prophet Mark Taylor, whom you may recall told us … Continue reading

Posted in Coach Dave, Mark Taylor, snark, The Freemasons, The Illuminati are comin' to getcha, Theocrats | 7 Comments