Category Archives: The New Math

Separated at Birth, but snarkier

One Lump of Stupid or Two, K-Mac?

As Nancy Pelosi famously said, the only qualification to be Speaker of the House is to know how to count. Oops: In an apparent error, House Republicans passed a resolution on Tuesday that would give Democrats a supermajority on a … Continue reading

Posted in K-Mac Kevin McCarthy who is very bad at his job, The New Math, Wingnuttia | 3 Comments

Bad Signs, Cont.

Subtraction will be fun too, when you think about it.

Posted in Bad Signs, The New Math | 4 Comments

The New Math

(A wolf plus a centerfold) multiplied by money equals Mel) Any questions? (Yes, it’s the return of an old feature, in which we try to explain people using pop culture X + Y formulae! You know, like when Hollywood makes … Continue reading

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The New Math

(Cheesey ’80s Terminator + Big-haired Cheesey Greedhead Gordon Gekko) divided by loveable goof-prone greedhead Scrooge McDuck = The Willard Mechanism Does anyone have any questions?

Posted in 2012 Goat Rodeo, The New Math, Willard | 3 Comments

The New Math, cont.

Blue Gal reminds us that we have not done any New Math lately. Hmmm… (Hat tip: Blue Gal via email)

Posted in The New Math | 3 Comments

The New Math

(A fallen-down drunk (squared) + strangely orange oompa loompa) multiplied by the cubed root of (convicted of corruption Duke Cunningham multiplied by a dog screwing a pig) equals drunken orange corrupt pig-fucker, John Boehner, AKA Weepy Any Questions?

Posted in The New Math, Weepy | 6 Comments

The New Math

(Big-haired serial adulterer and former GOP speaker of the house Newt Gingrich multiplied by Hooker-and-diaper-play sex fiend, GOP Senator David Vitter multiplied by Toe-tapping Tea-Room sex fiend, GOP Senator Larry Craig, multiplied by Family Values Baptist Preacher Hooker-and-Meth sex fiend … Continue reading

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The New Math

This post is dedicated to Lockwood who won the contest to re-nickname Meghan McCain, previously known in these parts as “Butterball.” We decided to re-christen Meghan when it was pointed out, repeatedly, that “butterball” could be interpreted as being fat-phobic. … Continue reading

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The New Math

(Dog humping a pig added to ’80s iconic Col. John “Hannibal” Smith) multiplied by the quadratic root of (the insane rantings of Howard Beal for ratings minus any journalism or integrity of Edward R. Murrow) equals anything for ratings-humper nutjob … Continue reading

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The New Math

Tengrain (Scarlett O’Hara as played by a non-southerner divided by demonically posessed Regan from the Exorcist) multiplied by (reader of children’s stories, Mr. Rogers, squared, added to the exotic and mysteriously unexplained sidekick of Johnny Quest, Hadji) equals oddly accented … Continue reading

Posted in 2012 Goat Rodeo, Bobby Jindal, Boy Exorcist (Stupid Party—LA), The New Math | Comments Off on The New Math