Category Archives: People Dumber than Dolphins

QED Bitchez: You Cannot Investigate A Sitting Prznint For ANY Crimes!

Clue: In the Conservatory On 5th Ave.*, Gun, Mango-hued Shitgibbon Prznint Stupid’s sharks, er, lawyers literally argued that if Comrade Stupid shot someone on 5th Avenue in NYC in broad daylight, law enforcement officers couldn’t do anything about it while … Continue reading

Posted in Comrade Preznint Stupid, The Russian Usurper, People Dumber than Dolphins | 14 Comments

‘If Oliver Wendell Douglas Could Buy Green Acres…’

“…then why can’t I buy Greenland?” Denmark is a very special country with incredible people, but based on Prime Minister Mette Frederiksen’s comments, that she would have no interest in discussing the purchase of Greenland, I will be postponing our … Continue reading

Posted in Comrade Preznint Stupid, The Russian Usurper, People Dumber than Dolphins, Pop Culture | 10 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs Let’s listen as Gawd’s own historian, Dave Barton (no doctorate, so no honorific), explains to us why fetus-fondling gawd-botherers have more civil rights than the rest of us: That’s a novel interpretation of the First Amendment! … Continue reading

Posted in Blog Against Theocracy, David Barton, First Amendment, People Dumber than Dolphins, Theocrats | 4 Comments

Pounds Head On Desk Looking For Sweet, Sweet Relief

Oh, jeebus. The United KINGSTON?!!! Whatever happened to the Prince of Whales? (Hat tip: Scissorhead D-Cap)

Posted in Congratulations, Ivanka-ka, The First Shady, People Dumber than Dolphins | 14 Comments

That Didn’t Take Long!

Federal Judge Amit Mehta upheld a Democratic subpoena for Prznint McGrifter’s personal and business financial records. The ruling is the first by a federal judge considering Prznint Stupid’s legal efforts to avoid congressional subpoenas and could set a legal precedent … Continue reading

Posted in Little-Kremlin-on-the-Potomac, People Dumber than Dolphins, Tax Cheat | 2 Comments

Stable Genius Horse Expert Now, Too, Also

So many horses’ asses in one picture. Anyway, Comrade Stupid commented on The Kentucky Derby with hiss own tiny fingers: Kentuky? Political correctness? And trust us, we know that the best horse did not win the race, but got the … Continue reading

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Comrade Preznint Stupid, The Russian Usurper, People Dumber than Dolphins, sports | 3 Comments

Devin Nunes Sues His Cow

Midnight runner Devin Nunes is suing Twitter and several of its users for more than $250 million, accusing them of defamation and negligence. The defendants include two anonymous parody accounts, “Devin Nunes’ Mom” and “Devin Nunes’ Cow.” Here’s the tweet … Continue reading

Posted in People Dumber than Dolphins | 10 Comments

Here’s Some Stupid For Lunch

Rep. Clay Higgins: "73,000 American troops landed in the D-Day invasion. We have 76,103 – according to my numbers – apprehensions along our southern border last month. We have D-Day every month on our southern border." — ABC … Continue reading

Posted in Clay Higgins, People Dumber than Dolphins, snark, Y'all Qaeda | 23 Comments

Maths. How Do They Work?

Is Hot Ham, er, Scottie Walker just stupid or just lying to fifth graders (and still stupid)? Explaining tax rates before Reagan to 5th graders: “Imagine if you did chores for your grandma and she gave you $10. When you … Continue reading

Posted in People Dumber than Dolphins, Scott 'Hot Ham' Walker (R-Koch Industries) | 16 Comments

Dummies Gonna Dumb, Dumb, Dumb

So after Taylor Swift did Democratic Senate candidate Phil Bredesen a real solid and endorsed him over Marsha Blackburn, Bredesen decided that the moment was right to go #HimToo, and volunteered that he would have voted to confirm to the … Continue reading

Posted in 2018 Pie Fight, People Dumber than Dolphins | 5 Comments