Future Trump AF-1
(Air Forced Once?)

This article is EVERYTHING:

On Trump Force One, KFC Is On The Menu and 45 Is Still President

(Bloomberg) — Donald Trump wants back in the White House — badly. Look no further than the recreation of Air Force One protocols on his recent trip to Iowa, the key Republican early-voting primary state.

There had been questions as to whether he was fully committed to a third White House bid after a lackluster November announcement. But the vernacular and procedures evident in traveling with the former president and current front-runner for the GOP nomination cast light on Trump’s yearning for the trappings of the White House.

His Boeing 757, dubbed “Trump Force One,” a blue, red and white plane with his last name in bold, gold lettering, was visible from the road near the private Palm Beach airport, just as Air Force One was when Trump would visit Mar-a-Lago as president.

And that sets the scene for what follows, which is sort of like a highlights reel of his 2-drink minimum stand-up:

Shortly after Trump’s plane was wheels up from Iowa back to Palm Beach, a flight attendant walked to the front with a large red and white bucket of KFC chicken. Aides went back and forth to the plane’s kitchen with plates of fried chicken, mashed potatoes and macaroni and cheese. Coconut pie was served for dessert. The soundtrack from his rallies lightly played on the plane’s speakers.

Trump again held a freewheeling conversation with reporters, and it was clear he was eager to tear into DeSantis. In response to a reporter’s question about a Bloomberg story on nicknames he was mulling, Trump said “Tiny D’s good.”

We do not know if Tiny D is about DisHonest being a lowlife in high heels, or a reference to the size his junk, but it works on multiple levels.

The former president knocked his potential rival for perceived disloyalty, launching into a diatribe about DeSantis working in a law firm in an alternate reality.

“Right now he’d be working at a law office. Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz and Schwartz. Where’s my f——— governor? Where’s my governor? Get him over here! He’s got 10 minutes or we’re gonna fire him. That’s what he’d be doing right now,” Trump said, laughing.

As Chuck Berry’s “Johnny B. Goode” played over the speakers, Trump told reporters, “Remember, this Ron DeSanctimonious would be right now working probably at a law firm or maybe a Pizza Hut. I hope you had a good time.”

“I’ve been Great! You’ve been OK!  Thanks for coming! Try the KFC!,” he didn’t holler.