Betting Odds on Nikki-the-Handmaiden Winning The 2024 Goat Rodeo

The 2024 Goat Rodeo Begins
(Courtesy of seekrit scissorhead @NamelessCynic of the Tweeters)

Nikki Haley, former South Carolina governor and current handmaiden,  a woman of color running for President in the 2024 Goat Rodeo in what can only charitably called the White Men Nationalist Party, took a sample size of one (herself) and declared that her candidacy is proof that racism is dead.

We’ll see if she secures the Republican nomination on those grounds, especially because she does not mention one of her symbolic triumphs: taking down the Confederate flag from the SC capitol. Odd that.

Anyway, Dan Pfeiffer offers his opinion of the handmaiden’s case for przninit:

I have no idea why Nikki Haley is running for President. And based on her first week on the campaign trail, neither does she. When asked why she should be President, Haley answered, “why not me?”

The former South Carolina Governor turned Trump Cabinet member’s announcement speech was a Cheesecake Factory’s menu worth of cliches, focus-grouped pablum, and circular arguments. Haley is simultaneously running on a platform of representing generational change, being a trailblazer, a loyal Trump soldier, a Trump critic, and a winning candidate. Why pick one lane when you can randomly swerve across all of them? Despite what Aaron Sorkin would have you believe, it takes more than a slogan that fits on a napkin.

Okay, rant over. As you can probably tell, I am professionally offended by the lack of thought put into Haley’s decision to run for the most powerful office in the world. If she had a rationale for her run, it is the spurious idea that she is more electable than the rest of the field.

We will be surprised if Haley gets even a single delegate.

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5 Responses to Betting Odds on Nikki-the-Handmaiden Winning The 2024 Goat Rodeo

  1. She’s a real dark horse candidate.


  2. gruaud says:

    That is some ninja-level dingbattery.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Stony Pillow says:

    This time the RNC is needs at least two POC flavors of the month (Haley, Scott, ???) before they settle in after Iowa to the white male grievance rodeo. Too bad they killed off Herman (nein, nein, nein) Cain.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. w3ski4me says:

    Anytime the GQP opens up the spigot of their cesspool, another scum candidate will ooze out. It’s a never-ending cesspool of unsuitable candidates. Old Donny was one of the most odorous, but he is just another pile in the pool.


  5. genelms says:

    I think her actual goal is to be the VP candidate on Mango Mussolini’s ticket. Her ability to think things through beyond the immediate sugar high of being in S**t-Stains orbit was extinguished when she took the Ambassador gig.


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