As the alert reader is aware, 2023 is just a year before 2024, and so the Goat Rodeo is starting. Of course Lord Damp Nut already declared, but there are some other goats getting fitted for saddles. Here’s what we know so far:
- Lord Damp Nut – He’s already declared, had the traditional Republican dinner with Nazis and anti-Semites, and has disappeared because he saw his shadow.
- Walking Termite Buffet Mike Pence – He’s written a dreary book and showing up wherever it is that people want to lure the termites away from their homes. Not officially declared. Yet.
- Ron DeSanctimonious – the so-called Trump without the baggage. The newly wed and nearly dead of Florida love the guy —despite his squeaky voice— and his record of hating everyone MAGA hates is airtight.
- Mike Pompous, er, Pompeo – He is half the man he used to be (seriously, he has lost a lot of weight, he’s hard to recognize) His pitch: less boring than Pence, but with all the Jeebus.
Undoubtedly there are others making noises in the bath and staring into the mirror and seeing a future president. I’m sure we will be updating this list.