The groundswell to elect ambulatory Termite Buffet Mike Pence —a man so wooden termites salivate when he enters a room— turns out to be a prank:
WASHINGTON – Former Vice President Mike Pence did not file to run for president for 2024 on Monday after hoax screenshots of a Federal Election Commission posting began circulating online, according to his spokesperson.
“Former Vice President Mike Pence did not file to run for President today,” Devin O’Malley, Pence’s spokesperson, wrote on Twitter.
The screenshot of the FEC filing, which appears to be fake, was filed under “Mike Richard Pence” and included a post office box address from Anderson, Ind. Pence’s full first name is “Michael.” The address has been used previously by Pence in past filings.
“I didn’t do it,” said a termite, wiping some drool from its chin. “Anderson, Indiana, you say?,” the termite added as it booked a flight.