Tweet, Twit, Twat
(Image courtesy of Scissorhead Bruce388)

Lord Damp Nut, who is currently running a $10K Ameros-per-day fine for not turning over documents to NY AG Letitia James, is pursuing  a novel legal gambit: The Dog Ate My Homework, er, I Cannot Find My Phone:

11. I am not currently in possession of any Trump Organization-issued phones, computers or similar devices. I believe the last phone or device I was issued by the Trump Organization was a cell phone in 2015. I no longer have the cell phone in my possession and I am not aware of its current location.

12. Since January 1, 2010, I previously owned two flip phones and a Samsung mobile phone. a. believe the last phone or device I was issued by the Trump Organization was a cell phone in 2015. I no longer have the cell phone in my possession and I am not aware of its current location. 12. Since January 1, 2010, I previously owned two flip phones and a Samsung mobile phone. a. I do not have the two flips phones in my possession and I do not know their current whereabouts. b. I took the Samsung with me to the White House and it was taken from me at some point while I was President. I do not have the Samsung in my possession and I do not know its current whereabouts.

13. Currently, I own two personal mobile phones: a. I have an iPhone which I have owned for several years and is for my personal use. b. I also have a new phone which I was recently given by Truth Social just last week. I use this phone exclusively for posting on Truth Social and no other purpose. I have never placed or received a call, sent orreceived a text message, or used this phone in any other manner.

14. also have a new phone which I was recently given by Truth Social just last week. I use this phone exclusively for posting on Truth Social and no other purpose. I have never placed or received a call, sent or received a text message, or used this phone in any other manner.

As Lord Damp Nut has only sent one TRUTH to his newest failure, this seems likely.

But we also note that as widely reported Hair Füror had (allegedly) private, non-secure phones that he used to Tweet his incoherent screeds. His second Chief of Staff famously was hunting them down all the time to stop the boss from compromising national security.

Anyway, I think today brings us to about $150K Ameros in penalties.