One Lump of Stupid or Two?

Stable Jenius

There are many things to be afraid of in life, but if you are a Stable Jenius like Hair Füror, the list is longer and includes someone doing fruit.

“If you see someone getting ready to throw a tomato, just knock the crap out of them, would you?”

Asked why he made that specific request, Trump testified that his campaign had received a threat that day. “They were going to throw fruit,” he claimed. “And you get hit with fruit, it’s—no, it’s very violent stuff. We were on alert for that.”

In a comedic moment, the plaintiffs’ lawyer Benjamin Dictor dryly remarked, “A tomato is a fruit after all, I guess,” and Trump’s attorney Jeffrey Goldman jumped in to confirm: “It has seeds.”

The former president then continued on the subject of frightful fruits: “It’s worse than tomato, it’s other things also. But tomato, when they start doing that stuff, it’s very dangerous. There was an alert out that day.”

Trump conceded that his remarks may have been “said sort of in jest,” but quickly added that there was “a little truth to it” because hurled tomatoes are “very dangerous stuff.” He noted: “You can get killed with those things.”

Asked whether he was trying to “incentivize people to engage in violence,” the former president responded: “No, I wanted to have people be ready because we were put on alert that they were going to do fruit.”

Trump continued with another tomato tirade: “And some fruit is a lot worse than—tomatoes are bad, by the way. But it’s very dangerous. No, I wanted them to watch. They were on alert. I remember that specific event because everybody was on alert. They were going to hit, they were going to hit hard.”



This entry was posted in Hair Führer Donald Trump, People Dumber than Dolphins, Things that will kill us all. Bookmark the permalink.

25 Responses to One Lump of Stupid or Two?

  1. Jimmy T says:

    Can’t wait until the imagined perpetrators discover frozen quarts of Frutti Tutti Ice Cream. That would certainly raise a most satisfying yelp…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Stony Pillow says:

    Eggs worked for the Patriot Convoy.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Big Bad Bald Bastard says:

    I think we should start throwing durians at these a-holes.

    Liked by 6 people

  4. retiredeng says:

    The GOP “leader” is a “real manly man” leading the “real men” party? He’s afraid of his own shadow.

    Liked by 1 person

    • FELINE MAMA says:

      I wonder if he is met with flying tomatoes, if he will react like he did during his ’16 candidacy. A balloon burst, loud, and he went running towards exit stage right. FUNNEEE!
      So, he’s not the least concerned about guns, bombs,etc ?
      Tomatoes would be embarassing.

      Liked by 2 people

      • MDavis says:

        Was this followed with declaration from his cult followers (or handlers, maybe) that he was just running for the backstage where he knew there was a gun he could grab and come out shooting?
        I remember a comparison between him and Hillary when each had someone rush the stage. The two incidents were within a week or so. Hillary took the “the Secret Service will handle it, I stand like this to make their job easier and so they can move me if they need to” position and Trump started darting around frantically looking for escape. But the cultists claimed he was just looking for a way to attack while she froze in terror.
        Life in opposite world.

        Liked by 2 people

  5. Little Davey says:

    I love the categories that this is posted under:
    Hair Führer Donald Trump, People Dumber than Dolphins, Things that will kill us all.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I watched this on Rachel Maddow’s show last night, she has steely nerves, hardly giglled at all!

    All I could ever think of was :

    Liked by 2 people

  7. w3ski4me says:

    “One lump or two?” With Donny, you always get 2 scoops of stupid.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Mary says:

    Probably worried a tomato would knock that hairy creature off this head.

    Liked by 3 people

  9. FELINE MAMA says:

    Sometime in his life, he had an embarassing, traumatic experience with the tomat’.
    Maybe he was upset because , bacon, lettuce & toast weren’t included. YUMMM, BLT’s !!!
    What a Moron !

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Said like a man who’s had many things thrown at him.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. ¥eem says:

    I always recommend rotten onions as projectiles. They tend to have a bit more impact than tomatoes, and leave behind a peculiar stink that’s hard to wash off.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Oh geez, the hell with fruit & vegetables. Just use rocks, like my ancestor William Wallace did.

    Liked by 2 people

Comments are closed.