Sen. Ted Cruz, once famous for reading Green Eggs and Ham to the nation and who notoriously liked some mommie porn on Twitter, is now warning us that Mickey wants to raw dog Pluto:
We do not have confirmation that Cruz realizes that Pluto is a dog or that both of them are, uh, drawings, but whatevs! It’s a Culture War, and that’s ol’ Teddy’s priority. One might even say he’s grooming & sexualizing the news that Disney is opposed to Floriduh Governor Ron DeSantis Don’t Say Gay law.
Now of course no one —except a filthy perv like Ayatolla Ted— thinks hot mouse-on-dog action is gonna be on Disney, but as an avowed 2024 Goat Rodeo contender, Ted loves to throw red meat to the base.