Judge Prepares for When the Deer Will Attack California

Possum Hollar presents… Angry-Git-Yer-Gun

Here’s some judicial logic:

U.S. District Judge Roger Benitez of San Diego ruled that the state’s definition of illegal military-style rifles unlawfully deprives law-abiding Californians of weapons commonly allowed in most other states and by the U.S. Supreme Court…

“Like the Swiss Army knife, the popular AR-15 rifle is a perfect combination of home defense weapon and homeland defense equipment. Good for both home and battle,” the judge said in his ruling’s introduction.

Benitez  —who was a nominee of Chimpy McStagger— seems to be worrying about Californians defending themselves against weaponized deer and when Idaho eventually invades.

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15 Responses to Judge Prepares for When the Deer Will Attack California

  1. Steve-O says:

    I have a pretty good swiss army knife. With it, I can cut cord, string, rope, wood. I can file metal, pull splinters out of my finger with tweezers, open cans, screw and unscrew things, use my pliers, punch holes in leather, and even open a bottle of wine.
    Pretty certain I could survive in the woods with my swiss army knife.
    An AR-15 can be pointed at me, barrel at my head, and then the owner of said AR-15 would have my swiss army knife, so yeah, I guess an assault rifle is like a swiss army knife.
    For fucks sake.

    Liked by 6 people

  2. RWW says:

    In his opinion, this genius of a judge also said that believing the nation is awash in assault weapons is hyperbole created by media, then he went on to justify his decision by concluding that AR-15s have become so popular that now they are simply “ordinary”. Either he’s ignorant as to the definition of hyperbole, or he understands perfectly it isn’t hyperbole at all and wants to make it even more true.

    Liked by 2 people

    • robginchicago says:

      I’ve been Google-ing like crazy, but just can’t seem to find any articles about the hotel mass murderer in Las Vegas (Oct. 2, 2017) using a Swiss Army Knife to kill 59 people and injure 500 at a Country Music concert.

      Like

  3. spotthedog says:

    “Like the Swiss Army knife, the popular AR-15 rifle is a perfect combination of home defense weapon and homeland defense equipment. Good for both home and battle” – that just sounds like a damn gun seller’s sales pitch.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. roket says:

    I suspect his commission was paid under the table.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. laura says:

    Show of hands – who feels safer?

    Like

    • spotthedog says:

      Ammosexuals who already have dozens of guns and were convinced Obama was gonna take them all away 10 years ago. So, probably nobody reading this.

      Like

  6. pagan in repose says:

    It all reminds me of the “How many roads must a man walk down…”

    Like

  7. Will Durst used to reply to the “gun is just a tool” argument by saying “and you can use a chainsaw to slice butter, it’s just goinna get a little messy at toast-time!”

    Like

  8. artahzen says:

    Next, some judge will say that not allowing us to pack heat, openly or hidden, without permits, or training is unconstitutional and then I am taking my AR 15 and strapping it over my shoulder like my purse. Let someone get close enough to me that I am afraid they have covid and BLAM goes the weasel. Who could blame me? I am a a little 70 year old lady and at risk even though I have been vaccinated. Maybe I can tune up some of these Gavin haters with their recall stupidity and settle their hash by claiming that they are hurting my feelings and I am standing my ground. More guns, more death, more hate should make us a more polite country, right, but instead the opposite is happening? Whodaguessedit? (I don’t have an AR-15 but I do have a Mossberg shot gun because I, like a lot of ammosexuals, don’t aim all that well.)

    Liked by 1 person

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