This Exists

Vice tells us:

Escape Zoom Meetings by Faking Technical Issues and Crying With This App

No one wants to be in another Zoom meeting. No matter how pleasant our coworkers or how pressing the topic, we’re all exhausted by staring at a camera during the pandemic and nodding along while other people talk. Zoom Escaper is a new program for those who need a break from the grinding crush of virtual interaction. It works by replicating the kind of audio problems that let people flee meetings—crying babies, weeping men, construction, echoes, and feedback…

Zoom Escaper has eight different effects. “Echo” and “bad connection” make it sound like you’re experiencing Zoom technical issues we are all familiar with by now.   The other six options on Zoom Escaper allow you to leave “by self-sabotaging your audio so your presence becomes unbearable to other people,” said creator Sam Lavigne. You can insert an upset baby or barking dog into the audio and crank the volume. There’s construction noise, wind, and the sounds of urination. The most disturbing is the weeping man, which makes it sound as if someone else in the room is working through something and it’s all being broadcast online. They aren’t the most pleasant ways to leave a meeting, but these are desperate times.

This is genius.

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4 Responses to This Exists

  1. E.A. Blair says:

    I found a place online where I downloaded a whole slew of recordings that are variations on “…the number you reached has been disconnected / is not in service / not completed as dialed…”. I use them as my voicemail greeting (but I have to tell my friends that it’s not real).


  2. spotthedog says:

    As a former coworker liked to say “necessity is a mother”.


  3. CalicoJack says:

    Necessity is the mother of all invention. American exceptionalism at its best.


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