2024 Goat Rodeo
The lone voice of Marco ‘Big Gulp’ Rubio, the Cold Warrior for a New Generation, and beloved grandson figure of Wingnuts over the age of 65 and under the age of death, breaks through the void to announce his electoral intentions:
“If the President says he’s going to run in 2024, he’ll probably clear the field, he’ll be the Republican nominee, and he’ll spend the next four years running. And then I think he would have a chance to win, not just the primary, but the General Election. As we just saw we had a very close election. It’s his decision to make, but if he decides to run, I think what it means is that Donald Trump will be the next Republican nominee,” Rubio told NBC 6 in Miami…
“I still have work to do in the U.S. Senate. We’ve had a very successful four years out of the six years in this term. I have two years left in this term, and we have a lot of work to do. We’re full steam ahead,” Rubio said. “I’m also doing my job, which I think is one of the most important things you can do if you want to be reelected. I have every intention of being on that ballot in November of 2022, and I feel very good about the account we’ll be able to bring to the people of Florida.”
A relieved Floriduh salutes you, Big Gulp.