Happy Hour News
Weather warrior and self-proclaimed prophetess Kat Kerr tells us that Dawg Almight wants to bribe us to vote for Prznint Stupid, which doesn’t sound like ineffability to me, but what do I know about theology?
Screw you, Kat, we were promised Taco Trucks on every corner.
Mock Paper Scissors 
So, five new brands of overly caffeinated sugary drinks? Dedicated people have been working on a cure for cancer since long before Trump came along and if it exists they’ll find no matter who gets elected. And as far as inventions we never even dream of having go, well they’ve seem to come along all the time and usually there is a good reason why we never even dreamed of having them. So I’m voting for Biden.
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WTF has she been drinkin’/tokin’???
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Burn the wicked witch of the unicorns.
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I can easily dream of MANY inventions that should never, ever get invented. Unless she wants to try some out?
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Oh. Her.
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We know windmills won’t be one of the five, cause y’know, cancer.
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I was promised a helicopter. Not long ago. Where’s my helicopter?
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In 1957 I was reading one of Dad’s Popular Mechanics magazines. The cover featured an illustration of dad, mom, sis, and junior in a 1967 Oldsmobile, about 200 feet off the ground, waving to another family of Cleavers in their yard. The ground-based Cleavers happily waved back.
It’s 2020. Still no flying cars. Tick Tock.
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Fuck the flying cars; where’s that robot lawnmower we were promised?!?!?!
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I mean, it’s just too easy to visualize a “tRump Train” caravan whizzing through the sky. (swidt?)
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They aren’t robots, but automatic lawnmowers used to be called “sheep”.
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