News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs

MAGA life coach (you know, with “2 maybe 3” successful clients) Brendon Dilley says it’s studs like him and Lord Damp Nut that are gonna save the country:

You can take his word for it.

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18 Responses to News That Will Drive You To Drink

  1. Redhand says:

    Jaysus, where do you find these people?

    Liked by 2 people

  2. beckymaenot says:

    Liked by 1 person

  3. spotthedog says:

    Silly Dilley! I wasn’t entirely sure that was not a parody of a Trump-nut.

    Like

  4. roket says:

    Brendon Dilley, the Alpha-Male wannabe, has been left behind. In his mother’s basement.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Richard Portman says:

    Oh man that is so sad! My crackpot theory is that we get this disfunction from the television. Most people i know are watching that magic box everyday. I’m no better just because i prefer radio.
    Whatever the cause, we are seriously stupid people right now. They sent us a gift, a surprise package, it will change things. All in a big fancy box with a ribbon that says TRUMP in gold letters.
    We are stupid people. Nobody took the time to help him. Nobody asked what he is good at. Nobody asked how are you? Nobody said, please say hello to your family and tell them i say hello!
    Nobody did that.
    I feel sad for him. We are stupid people.

    Like

  6. Big Bad Bald Bastard says:

    Alpha males can walk down ramps without assistance.

    Like

    • MDavis says:

      Alpha males are actually attractive to the ladies and don’t have to buy affection.
      I saw it in a doc about a monkey troupe. A nasty young upstart took over from the alpha until the ladies got tired enough of him that they got together and beat the crap out of him. I think the gents kicked in, too.

      Like

  7. Richard Portman says:

    Alpha males are a bunch of jack offs! Also they are cruel ignorant idiots . They watch documentaries about monkeys. They like watching, but when ask for help, no way.
    Alpha monkeys, who even thought of this.

    Like

    • MDavis says:

      It’s a thing, alpha monkeys, but it isn’t what this jagoff things.
      The doc I sawIn t don’t remember them calling him alpha – but he was leader of the troupe because he was a nice and caring monkey, and would check in regular with everyone to make sure they were getting all the bananas they needed, figuratively speaking. That sort of thing.
      The upstart was a pirate, so he didn’t last. Like this guy, who thinks being a bully is being the lead monkey. He’s wrong.

      Like

  8. Richard Portman says:

    Is it edible, or should we just ignore it?

    Like

  9. Chris Papalia says:

    “Beautiful, beautiful children…”

    I think Brendan may have a thing for Eric there!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. paul fredine says:

    ‘athlete’. i. can’t. even. i did notice, however that he avoids talking about his ‘jenius’ at school and in business. briefly mentioning he’s a ‘multi-billionaire’ (highly debatable) should not be considered an ‘accomplishment’. but now that his alma mater has it’s first woman-of-color dean maybe she can do something about getting his school records released. that would/could be quite an october surprise.

    Liked by 1 person

    • MDavis says:

      The only reason that the multi-billionaire comment is debatable is that he’s been pillaging at the big pigs’ trough for some three years, now. Otherwise there’s no way.

      Like

  11. artahzen says:

    Every sentence that drools out of his pie hole is wrong. Trump is an alpha male? Alpha males hide in the bunker when people of other viewpoints are in the area? Alpha males pay prostitutes to spank them with a rolled up magazine? All of his children are beautiful? OMG, Uday and Qusay look like Beavis and Butthead without the charm or intelligence. I could go on but you saw the original and no amount of gilding would make it worse.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Richard Portman says:

    I’m gonna go stay with the nice and caring monkeys. That’s my monkeys. Us monkeys are having a hard time. We can’t go around. We understand this. But we miss our monkey ways.

    Thankfully, we don’t usually hold a grudge. The rest of this conversation will be for monkeys only.

    Like

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