Prznint Stupid’s lawyers finished their case, using only a fraction of their allotted time, because —as it turns out— you don’t need 24 hours to argue, “I’m not the puppet. You’re the puppet.” They left six hours on the table. Comrade Grifter doesn’t ever leave 6₵ on the table.
There wasn’t much difference between Monday’s and Tuesday’s defense (SQUIRREL!!1!).
It was Kabuki theater for an audience of (The Chosen) One. The Dirty Dozen’s defense was scripted to be used in political ads, and had nothing to do with the case at hand. It was like ordering a deli sandwich at the dry cleaners.
And so now we move into the 16-hour Questions and Answers part of the trial, when Senators will grill the House managers and the Dirty Dozen.
How it is supposed to work: Each party will alternate submitting written questions to Chief Justice John Roberts, who will read them, aloud!
- The questions must be signed by the senator or group of senators asking it, and they can be directed to either House managers or Trump’s defense team.
- Senators cannot ask each other questions.
- There’s no official time limit restricting House managers’ or the White House team’s response.
“Who put the lime in the coconut and drank it all up?”
“When did you stop beating your step children?”
“Who wrote the book of love?”
OK, maybe the questions will be even less germain. I’ve read that Sen. Josh Hee-Hawley (R-Possum Hollar) he’d like to ask about the whistleblower complaint, and about Hunter Biden.
A vote on whether to hear from witnesses is now expected on Friday, which brings us again to the topic of John Bolton!
- Prznint Stupid’s catchfarts are painting Bolton as a disgruntled employee and Tool of The Left lying to boost his book sales.
- Sen. James Lankford (R-OK) suggested that rather than call Bolton to testify, senators should simply read his manuscript in a classified setting. The first book sale! Q: can Republicans read?
- Accused sex-trafficking participant and lawyer-like person Alan Dershowitz said “Nothing in the Bolton revelations, even if true, would rise to the level of an abuse of power or an impeachable offense.” Which is an odd position for an alleged Constitutional Expert to take.
- Trump’s former chief of staff, John Kelly, said he believes Bolton’s account, and that he’s in favor of witnesses being called during the trial.
- The former chairman of Ukraine’s National Security and Defense Council, Oleksandr Danylyuk, also described Bolton as the one trustworthy person in the Trump administration.
- Danylyuk said that Trump’s requests for investigations rattled Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky’s team, and that he resigned in part because Trump broke Ukraine’s relationship with the U.S.
And I think that brings us up to speed for today’s festivities.
UPDATE 1: Bragging about hiring only the best people again!