Developing: Someone Was Too Dumb To Successfully Bribe Comrade Trump

Grifters Gotta Grift

Screw-you, cha-cha-cha

When Comrade Stupid put his hand on the Bible, and it did not burst into flames (and/or Dick Cheney did not materialize in a cloud of sulfer), and so it was the signal that the Oval Office was open for bidness, and like one of those prototype Amazon Grab ‘n’ Go stores, everything was for sale. Take what you want, it will be added to your tab like black magic!

You wanna be an ambassador? EZ, just buy a $200K Amero membership to Merda-a-Lardo like handbag designer Lana Marks!

You want to secretly run the VA for shits and giggles? You could do as Bruce Moskowitz, Marc Sherman, and Ike Perlmutter (the reclusive chairman of Marvel Entertainment, known for wearing Groucho glasses with nose and false mustaches to disguise himself in public!) did and pony-up for a Merde-a-Lardo membership, too/also.

You wanna be the new AG? Write a lovely letter to the DOJ explaining how The Russian Usurper is totally INNOCENT. It works like a charm, ask Bill ‘Low’ Barr!

You need a Pardon? Just write an ass-kissing book or two, and Boom! You’re a freeman, just ask Conrad Black for details!

What do we discern from these anecdotal stories? Kiss ass or buy a membership, but don’t be crass and tip Comrade Stupid a Benjamin, the man has class with a capital ASS, and no one in the mob every hands over the dough to the Don.

So it comes to us as a great surprise that someone would just show up with a boatload of small, unmarked Ameros in non-sequential order. It also surprised us that somehow Trump didn’t end up with the money AND the boat!

Is he slipping or is it possible that Comrade McGrifter has some sort of ethics after all?

No. The rube in this scenario, Stephan Calk, paid off the wrong grifter!

Calk, a former economic adviser to President Trump’s 2016 presidential campaign, was indicted Thursday for allegedly approving $16 million in loans to former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort in exchange for his help seeking a top post in the administration. Calk, the founder of mortgage lender Federal Savings Bank of Chicago, illegally used the bank’s resources to curry favor with Manafort, ignoring internal standards and lying to regulators, according to the indictment unsealed in the Southern District of New York.

I thought that at the better schools that all the plutocrats’ kids are bribing their way into that our future Overlords learned to never deal with the hired help, and here this Bankster Bastard was trying to buy an administration job from a lowly covfefe boy like Petting-zoo Paulie!

We need a better class of crook. What’s the world coming to? But I digress.

According to Calk’s indictment, Manafort took a break from his duties running Trump’s campaign on July 27, 2016, to attend an initial meeting in New York with a loan officer to discuss a multimillion-dollar loan. Calk joined by video and, according to prosecutors, told Manafort he would be interested in work on Trump’s campaign. . . . Calk did not testify at Manafort’s 2018 trial for bank and tax fraud, but other officers from his bank took the stand to describe the unusual process by which the bank approved a loan for Manafort.

So what did Calk expect for $18M Ameros? Oh, you know, the usual:

“Calk provided the Borrower with a ranked list of the governmental positions he desired, which started with Secretary of the Treasury, and was followed by Deputy Secretary of the Treasury, Secretary of Commerce, and Secretary of Defense, as well as 19 ambassadorships similarly ranked and starting with the United Kingdom, France, Germany, and Italy.”

The White House has “long refused to answer when Manafort actually stopped communicating with members of Trump’s orbit,” for obvious reasons we now understand.

But what is even funnier is that according to the indictment on or about Nov. 30, 2016, Manafort ‘sent a recommendation to a senior member of the Presidential Transition Team’s executive committee (‘Transition Official-1’) that CALK be appointed Secretary of the Army. Per Tiger Beat on the Potomac (thanks Charlie!) morning email thingie (emphasis mine):

“Kushner isn’t named in the indictment, but at Manafort’s trial, prosecutors introduced an email Manafort sent to Kushner on Nov. 30 recommending Calk be nominated for Army secretary. ‘On it!’ Kushner wrote. Calk was interviewed on Jan. 10 for the Army secretary job and ultimately did not get it, the indictment says.

Looks like Calk bribed the wrong grifter!

So Paulie took the $18M Ameros and ran? And Calk is holding the (now empty) bag for trying to bribe this administration. Calk faces up to 30 years in prison, while Manafort is currently serving a seven-and-a-half-year sentence.

Just let that sink in for a moment. Dude was so stupid he couldn’t successfully bribe Prznint Comrade Trump, the most avaricious, grasping grifter in the history of the Republic, and he’s gonna spend more time in the sneezer than Paulie.

This entry was posted in Fratsputin Jared Kushner, Grifters Gotta Grift, Lord Damp Nut, The Russian Usurper, Paul 'Putin's Pal' Manafort. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Developing: Someone Was Too Dumb To Successfully Bribe Comrade Trump

  1. It is to Nelson Laugh: HAH HAH!

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  2. Dennis Cole says:

    I wouldn’t worry overmuch about Calk’s future. Commander Bunnypants can just wave his magic wand, er, sprinkle some magic fairy dust, er, use the Power of Pardon by Prestidigitation just like he’s planning to do for the various and assorted war criminals this upcoming memorial Day. Soon enough, there will be a Presidential Pardon found in every box of Cracker-Jacks(tm), because that’s how many they’re going to need.

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