The Shut-Down Follies, Cont.

Our Stable Genius

Hey guys, remember last week when Prznint Stupid said he’d be “proud” to shut down the federal gubmint if he did not get $5B Ameros to build his stupid wall? Haha, he was just kidding! Don’t you people have a sense of humor?!

Without offering specifics, Elmira Gantry Huckabee-Sanders said, “We have other ways that we can get to that $5 billion.” [insert Warner-Brothers cartoon of breaking into a safe here…]

Commander Bunnypants said he could take the money out of the military budget, which is illegal. Amply be-chinned Mitch McConnell suggested that Trump be given a billion-dollar slush fund literally on the day that Comrade Trumps personal slush fund got dissolved by a law suit.

So, with two illegal offers rejected, Prznint Art-of-the-Deal still has not told anyone what he would accept to avoid a shutdown on Saturday.

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4 Responses to The Shut-Down Follies, Cont.

  1. roket says:

    It’s all about the timing. Whenever he announces his decision it will most assuredly end with “Merry Christmas MF’ers”.

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  2. Jim says:

    “Commander Bunnypants”. Love it. At least, they announced that gummint workers don’t have to work on Monday. So the awesome Dealmaker once again climbs down from his bellowing threats. Seems like everyone EXCEPT GOP lawmakers has Trump’s number.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Dennis Cole says:

    According to this morning’s newzpaper thingy, “the White House preference is for a longer term package (instead of another stopgap measure,) although the conversation remained fluid, as tRump has been known to quickly change course…”

    “We want to know what can pass,” Sanders said. “Once they make a decision and they put something on the table, (next to the Big Macs and Filet-o-Fish sammiches,) we’ll make a determination on whether we’ll move forward.”

    She continued to say that the Preznit has asked every agency head to look for loose change beneath the couch cushions “see if THEY have money that can be used.”

    And of course Yertle McTurtle had to chime in, regarding efforts by incoming Dims to come to some kind of bipartisan agreement, (and specifying Nasty Nancy Pelosi):
    “If I were in her shoes, I would rather not be dealing with this year’s business next year.”
    “Even if WE didn’t deal with this year’s business very much,” he didn’t add.

    So, not-shy Nancy shot back, with a salvo aimed across the bow:
    “We cannot accept the offer they made of a billion-dollar slush fund for the president to implement his very wrong immigration policies,” she said. “So that won’t happen.”

    I never realized politickin’ could be so much FUN!

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  4. robginchicago says:

    $5 billion for wall funding must be the “Quo” to Trump’s “Quid Pro” in removing sanctions from Putin’s buddy, Derepaska. If the Russians are satisfied, Manafort can do his time behind bars in peace, and keep his mouth shut.

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