News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs

Noted doomsday potato slop connoisseur Jim Bakker tells us that soon “they” (and he never says who the they is) are gonna be assassinating preachers, because they hate Comrade Trump:

I really cannot follow the logic there:

I hate my dry cleaner, so I’m going to kill the milkman?

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11 Responses to News That Will Drive You To Drink

  1. Jules MomCat says:

    Hey, Bakker–Martyrdom never comes cheaply–you gotta pay yer dues!

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  2. “Mankind will never be free until the last King is strangled with the entrails of the last Priest”

    Liked by 1 person

    • Big Bad Bald Bastard says:

      And both are stuffed in a bucket, which retails for $79.99, but you can have it for a faith donation of $58.95. Feeds a family of four for six weeks!

      Like

  3. Redhand says:

    Ah, exactly what is “the supernatural event of the last days?” The Mueller investigation?

    Fuck you, Jim.

    Like

  4. MDavis says:

    It isn’t logic. From the hesitancy and the slurring I’d guess maybe a stroke or Parkinson’s – but alcohol poisoning is always a good bet with that kind of speech pattern.
    I once had an acquaintance with schizophrenia who went off his meds. He made more sense than Bakker, here. His apartment got a little cluttered though (emphasis on cluttered – he started bringing home motorcycles from somewhere. No idea how many he had in there when he got evicted. He lived on the second floor, stairs only) If Bakker’s digs are in better shape I bet it’s because they make enough money for hired help.

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  5. RWW says:

    Oh I’d say God probably hates Trump and Bakker about the same. She doesn’t like con artists who buy golden toilets with ill-gotten gains.

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  6. Randall says:

    Hey buddy, those voices in your head? Yeah – those aren’t God.

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  7. Osirisopto says:

    Well, the rubes he’s fleecing are dumb as a box of rocks.

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  8. roket says:

    If you take candy from babies you deserve to be assassinated, asshole.

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  9. Bruce388 says:

    One ex-convict supporting a future convict.

    Liked by 1 person

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