Why dogs rarely work as Maitre D’s:
“Slip me some cheddar and I’ll give you a good seat near the dumpster!”
“If you are a RePukeLican, I’ll kindly escort you to the door, or to a seat IN the dumpster”.
What? I can’t hear you over how awesome I am.
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Dear Hoomin, if you’re going to melt into a puddle before me, my mom says pls do it over on the bare floor becuz she just vacuumed this rug.
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