Trump’s Razor Theorem Proven Again By Trump!

Comrade Preznint Stupid picks his fights carefully.

Trump’s Razor: Ascertain the stupidest possible scenario that can be reconciled with the available facts and that answer is likely correct.

We thought we should remind everyone of that at the top of the post before we dive into the news.

Comrade Stupid’s newest Legal Beagle and infamous 911 Marketing Manager, Rudy Giuliani, said on Wednesday—that Candidate Stupid reimbursed his fixer, Michael/Mikhail Cohen, on the ol’ lay-away scheme, which oddly seems to have p.o.’ed the Prznint.

So on Friday Comrade Stupid said that:

“Rudy is a great guy, but he just started a day ago,” the president said while addressing reporters outside the White House. “But he really has his heart into it. He’s working hard. He’s learning the subject matter.”

Trump added: “He’ll get his facts straight.”

 

The Donald claims that he never had a Forbes Magazine Happy Ending with porn star Stormy Daniels, and that unknown to himself, his stupidest lawyer, Michael/Mikhail Cohen paid her $130K Ameros keep quiet about a spanking he never enjoyed. Nice work if you can get it.

Then Prznint Stupid decided to give Cohen $35K Ameros per month for general cover-up work. And none of this had anything to do with the 2016 Goat Rodeo.  (Nice work if you can get it, and you can get it if you try!)

What Prznint Stupid and America’s Lawyer are trying to do, Lemony Snicket-style,  is find a series of unfortunate events that doesn’t involve either Stupid or Stupidest breaking the law.

Rudy Screwed the pooch on National TeeVee when he suggested the hush money was related to the election, which makes Stupid guilty of failing to report it as a campaign contribution.

Prznint Stupid felt had to correct him, and for good measure threw in “a witch hunt,” you know, to add some drama and veracity. No one who is guilty of anything can say anything about a witch hunt and not be turned into a mango hued shitgibbon. True fact. Oh, wait.

So Friday, Rudy said that the payment was to spare Melanoma embarrassment (Clue: Too Late!) and had nothing Nothing NOTHING to do with the election, YOU KNOW, despite happening 2 weeks before it.

Stupid and Stupider. Worst buddy film ever.

Keep talking boys. Maybe you’ll find a way to prove Trump’s Razor wrong.

 

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8 Responses to Trump’s Razor Theorem Proven Again By Trump!

  1. Osirisopto says:

    Add Phil Silvers and you’ve got the plot line of a 1960 shlameal, schlamozel comic movie.

    The little rich boy who has spent his daddy’s money playing gangster all his life gets in over his head, tells mr empty suit attorney exactly what happened, expecting ES to figure a way out of it all by himself because he’s such devious bastard.

    ES goes on teevee and repeates everything he was told.

    Hilarity ensues, when rich boy and ES are forced to make up bigger and bigger lies to cover their tracks. Climax ending a is a rambunctious public transit chase scene through the Burroughs of NY.

    mysterious foreign stranger gets the girl, the cash and lives happily ever after as rich boy gets sentenced to 20 years in prison after ES negotiated a plea bargain.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. roket says:

    Even though America’s Mayor, Noun-Verb-911, is making a feeble attempt at trying to establish attorney/client privilege, his fool for a client prefers the Sgt. Shultz routine, oblivious to the consequences. Open the Pandora’s box now.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. RWW says:

    This isn’t any kind of legal strategy because they believe Preznint Stupid is immune from criminal prosecution anyway. It’s all PR to feed the moron base and muddy the water when and if an impeachment is ever attempted. Ginning up their army of zombified morons to take to the streets is all they have left and they know it. Also/too it infuriates misogynist slobs like Trump and Ghouliani that some “two-bit whore” can bring the whole house of cards down, so they keep doubling down on this losing hand they dealt themselves from the bottom of the deck.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. w3ski4me says:

    Rudy is 80 something now, and has occasionally demonstrated that his faculties are almost ‘gone’. I understand he appeals to tRump by also being a loud mouthed New Yorker, but this is getting hilarious. In so many areas this Country need a National Retirement Age. Rudy is living proof.
    w3ski

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Bruce388 says:

    I’m guessing Rudy’s working for free, just for the attention. And he’s worth every ruble.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Pyed says:

    My first thought was that maybe Giuliani was bolloxing up Trump’s “clever” alibi because Trump once stepped on his foot, got to the microphone before Rudy, or possibly, looked better in one of Rudy’s dresses.

    On second thought, forget the last instance. Trump could never wear Giuliani’s clothes. Rudy is a Winter, and Trump is definitely a Fall.

    Liked by 1 person

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