News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs

You guys, notable Pizza-gate conspiracy theorist and journalist Liz Crokin is totally excited that Rudy Giuliani has joined the greatest legal team ever assembled to defend Prznint Stupid because, she claims, Rudy has seen or is in possession of “the tapes” taken from Chatroulette power-user Anthony Weiner that prove Hillary Clinton and Huma Abedin sexually assaulted a child:

Oddly, in her manic ululation, Crokin forgets to talk about the ritual cannibalism or removing the face of the child per her usual conspiracy claim, but you know, you cannot expect a professional journalist like ol’ Liz to remember her own story, amiright?

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3 Responses to News That Will Drive You To Drink

  1. roket says:

    Professional Journalist Liz Crokin said, “Tapes blah, blah, blah Clinton yadda, yadda, yadda, Witch something, something, Trump is Innocent bada bing bada boom. Thank You for listening.”

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    • Osirisopto says:

      No “send money”?

      What’s a RWNJ conspiracy monger without an appeal for money from the rubes?

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  2. RWW says:

    Oh and the children’s removed faces are made into pizza toppings. This is where “pizza face” originated!!!11!!!!

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