Steve Scalise: Lessons Unlearned

The Grim Reaper would like to have a word with Steve Scalise.

If we read our Dickens stories correctly, we know that when confronted with death Scrooge changes course and becomes a jolly sort of CEO and Tiny Tim gets to bless everyone. It’s an uplifting, object-lesson that it is never too late to improve oneself because Karma is a bitch.

Dickens never met gun-violence fetishist and noted NRA ball-licker, Steve Scalise (R-LA).

Let’s review his (public) life with an eye towards what the Ghost of Christmas Past might show Scalise as a reason to change  course. Let’s start with his bigotry:

Even after getting shot and nearly dying, Steve Scalise is still an NRA lackey.

And just for shits and giggles, we should note that Steve kinda hates The Skirts, too! (It’s important as we’ll show later…)

  • Voted NO on reauthorizing the Violence Against Women Act. (Feb 2013)
  • Voted YES on banning federal health coverage that includes abortion. (May 2011)
  • Prohibit transporting minors across state lines for abortion. (Jan 2008)
  • Bar funding for abortion under federal Obamacare plans. (Jul 2010)
  • Ban abortions for sex selection or race selection. (Dec 2011)
  • Prohibit federal funding for abortion. (May 2011)
  • Prohibiting forced abortions by UN Population Fund. (May 2011)
  • Congress shall protect life beginning with fertilization. (Jan 2011)
  • Prohibit federal funding to groups like Planned Parenthood. (Jan 2011)
  • No family planning assistance that includes abortion. (Jan 2013)
  • Declare preborn as persons under 14th amendment. (Feb 2009)

But wait! There’s more (not Ginsu knives, tho): Steve Scalise is a noted homophobe, too!

  • Authored constitutional amendment to protect marriage. (May 2008)
  • Amend Constitution to define traditional marriage. (Jun 2008)
  • Protect anti-same-sex marriage opinions as free speech. (Sep 2013)
  • State definition of marriage supersedes federal gay marriage. (Feb 2014)

So let’s tie all of this together in a neat package:

Capital Police Officer Crystal Griner, a lesbian of color took a bullet for him. To put it bluntly, this would be a Come To Jeebus moment for most people, Dickens couldn’t do better, but for Steve Scalise, meh. She’s everything he hates.

If this were Dickens, there would be a death bed scene where Scalise would resolve to improve himself.

instead, Scalise decided to speak at the Values Voters Summit, which as we all know is an annual event put on by noted SPLC-designated hate group Family Research Council.

I don’t say this sort of thing very often, but… couldn’t our fine doctors have screwed up just this once? There is nothing redeemable about Scalise. Dickens would give up.

This entry was posted in David Duke, Homophobia, sexism, Steve Scalise, The New Confederacy. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Steve Scalise: Lessons Unlearned

  1. osirisopto says:

    Dickens might give up, but Poe would be just getting started.


  2. RayLay says:

    may Stevie spend the rest of his life sitting in a little puddle of his own $hit! What an ass-hat


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