What’s Not Normal Today (Day 222)

“Run, little Trumpling, run!”

“Actually, in the middle of a hurricane, even though it was a Friday evening, I assumed the ratings would be far higher than they would be normally. You know the hurricane was just starting, and I put it out that I had pardoned, as we say, Sheriff Joe.”

He did it for ratings?

Comrade President Trump and Melanoma will be on the ground in Texas today (in Corpus Christi and Austin) for briefings on Hurricane Harvey relief and response. I hope she brought crayons: it’s scheduled for 5 hours.

We note that the shark in Texas stories are FAKE NEWS!!1! Liz Cheney was not there.

  • ABC News reports that candidate Trump signed a letter of intent to build the Moscow project 4 months into the 2016 Goat Rodeo. If Cohen’s statement is true, then Comrade Stupid’s statement (during the campaign) that he had no business dealings in Russia is whopper of a lie. Also/Too: Cohen is tightly intertwined with Trump, if Mueller can get him, he can get Comrade Stupid.
  • Noted ass-kisser Rep. Ron DeSantis (R-FL) has proposed a legislation to end Robert Mueller’s investigation in six months, and prohibit him from looking into anything that happened before 2015. Zombie-eyed Granny Starver Paul Ryan says that Hair Führer Donald Trump should let Robert Mueller do his job. 500 Quatloos on Ryan, any takers?
  • Comrade Preznint Stupid has Your’re Fired’ed  George Gigicos, his longtime aide who plans/planned his rallies. You see, the hate-rally in Phoenix really was poorly attended and all the braggadocio about crowd size was a lie. In what is now a tradition, Gigicos was You’re Fired’ed by Keith Schiller, Preznint Stupid’s personal bodyguard.
  • EPA Chief Scott Pruitt is under an investigation by the EPA’s Office of Inspector General.

And to balance out the news: The History of the Tater Tot.

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One Response to What’s Not Normal Today (Day 222)

  1. Sirius Lunacy says:

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