Comrade Preznint Stupid went to the terrible sand kingdom of Arizonastan to bask in the warm glow of sun-baked people who stood in line all day in triple digit heat to get into a convention center that never filled to listen to a half-baked man lie to them. Go figure.
If you have not seen or read Don ‘The Plane, The Plane’ Lemon’s response to this event, you should do so now.
Highlight moments for me:
- “I hope they’re showing how many people are in this room, but they won’t. They don’t even do that. The only time they show the crowds is when there’s a disrupter or an anarchist in the room.” CNN cut to this wide shot of the crowd, so CNN showed that he was lying in real time.
- “CNN does not want its falling viewership to watch what I’m saying tonight, I can tell you.” Comrade Stupid’s speech was being carried live on both CNN and CNN International.
- When Hair Führer dramatically reread his statement on Charlottesville and omitted the “many sides” and “both sides.”
- “Believe me, if we have to close down our government, we’re building that wall.”
- “I’ll make a prediction. I think [Sheriff Joe Arpaio] going to be just fine, OK (APPLAUSE) … But I won’t do it tonight.”
- “We will renegotiate NAFTA, or we will terminate NAFTA. I personally don’t think you can make a deal without a termination, but we’re going to see what happens, OK? … You’re in good hands, I can tell you.”
- “When it got a little heat with the lies from the media, [the CEOs who left his business councils] sort of said, ‘Oh, we’ll take a pass.’ … I remember the ones that did.”
- “But people are now calling me, people that have been, like, ‘we’ll take a pass’: ‘Don, can we get together for lunch? Let’s do it privately, instead of through a council.’ … They are calling, and they’re saying: ‘How about getting together privately?'”
- “I don’t believe that any president has accomplished as much as this president in the first six or seven months. I really don’t believe it.”
Claim Chowder: You might recall the official MPS prediction that the NYTime completely misunderstood Arizonastan and that this rally would go over bigly with the terrible sand people. We were right again!