Cindy Jacobs and The Spanish Word of the Day Calendar Save Us From North Korea, for Jeebus

Hold the presses!

Our Lady of Bountiful Pasta and Good Shoe Wear, Cindy Jacobs, nasally brays and interrupts the panel during the Potato Slop Maven’s Grifting Hour to give us the breaking news from Gawd, live and on the spot!

“Something major is being planned.” But Gawd won’t tell us what it is ahead of time, because reasons.

I like how Jeebus told her about stopping North Korea (중지) by using a Spanish word, which makes total sense, amiright?

That Gawd, his plan is so ineffable, if you know what I mean and I think you do.

This entry was posted in Cindy Jacobs, grifters, Theocrats. Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to Cindy Jacobs and The Spanish Word of the Day Calendar Save Us From North Korea, for Jeebus

  1. Torontonian says:

    . . . and Good Show Wear. . .
    I’m sure you meant “shoe”
    If I’m right, make the correction and take
    down this notice when you’re done.

    Like

    • Wolfgang Wolf says:

      “Good shoe wear” is correct . According to Cindy God has made her shoes last for years and years and years. Google “Cindy Jacobs Shoes’ and ponder the mysterious ways of God.

      Liked by 1 person

      • tengrain says:

        Wolf – our first experience with Cindy was her Miracle of Good Shoe Wear. For shits and giggles, please also Google ‘Cindy Jacobs Pasta.’ — it’s worth the clicks to get there.

        Rgds,

        TG

        Like

  2. tengrain says:

    Toro – I’m a great believe in owning my mistakes and I appreciate the efforts of readers to help me minimize my egregious errors. Thank you!

    Rgds,

    TG

    Like

  3. Pat Day says:

    Tonto Puta!!!! (Dumb Beeyaaach in Spanish) Basta in Spanish is “Enough”…….Alto in Spanish is “Stop”…….So, Cindy (Tonto Puta!!) ALTO!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. osirisopto says:

    She prophesied the lard said “I’m gonna expose, expose, expose right now!”
    I think she’s got something on her mind.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I want to talk about this woman’s nostrils. What the hell is going on there? It’s ridiculous. It’s like being at the business end of a double-barreled shotgun. Did Gawd say “this woman does not need a nose. It will prove she is blessed”?

    Like

  6. Sirius Lunacy says:

    I’m guessing what God said to these people was ‘bastards!’ Why the heck would God in his infinite wisdom suddenly speak Spanish to these fools. Of course the Lord works in mysterious ways so he may have said ‘basta’ as in enough already – quit braying out these blasphemies.

    Like

    • Bruce388 says:

      Miriam Ferguson is often credited with a quote allegedly spoken in reference to bilingualism in Texas schools: “If English was good enough for Jesus Christ, it ought to be good enough for the children of Texas.”

      Like

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