News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs

Jeebus weeps

Jeebus weeps

Proving to us again that Grifters Gotta Grift, self-declared prophet, Our Lady of Good Shoe Wear and Bountiful Pasta Cindy Jacobs is getting in on the Jericho Wall blower con we talked about earlier in the week:

About POTUS Shield

The Lord has summoned a prolific council of prelates and prophets to convene in Washington, D.C. one week prior to the inauguration of Donald Trump as the 45th President of the United States of America. These servants of God are especially gifted to discern the times and to prophesy the Word of The Lord, even so as we seek to prepare the way for transformation, reformation, and revival in our nation. We are called to gather in the nation’s capital and to raise up a shield of prayer and prophetic understanding, grounded in the firm foundation of the immutable Word of God, and inspired with fresh revelation by the Spirit of The Lord. These proven leaders are convening to release the Word of the Lord, and to lead this anointed assembly in powerful prayers, intercession, declarations and decrees over the White House, the Supreme Court, and Capitol Hill.

So send us cash is the next part, because we cannot get Gawd to work a miracle like funding this damn thing.

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14 Responses to News That Will Drive You To Drink

  1. Big Bad Bald Bastard says:

    Blessed are the pissmakers…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Redhand says:

    Let me see if I get this correct. These people think that Donald Trump, who is the antithesis of everything Christ preached, is the new Lord of America, who will preside over “transformation, reformation, and revival in our nation.” It doesn’t matter that Trump is: a narcissist, a congenital liar, a thief, a fraud, a slanderer, a misogynist, a sexual pervert and predator, a vicious bully who delights in humiliating his “enemies,” and a traitor to his country (I feel justified in saying this last given the Russian connection).

    All right then. It makes perfect sense to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. roket says:

    Worshiping false idols is a mortal sin. Where’s Moses when you really need him?

    Liked by 2 people

  4. HarpoSnarx says:

    ” prolific council of prelates and prophets”
    Translation: the same pissy, corrupt and dangerous assholes . . .

    Like

  5. Mr DeBakey says:

    I think Sarah Palin ghost-wrote that.

    it reads a bit like a Give-Unto-Caesar Word Salad.

    Like

  6. Steve-O says:

    Let’s get a collection of old gypsies and satanists to do a counter march, in the opposite direction, putting a curse on all those in DC.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. A.J. says:

    “…especially gifted to discern the times and to prophesy….”

    Ahem…

    “If you’re doing God’s work and God is perfect, how come you’re always wrong? Is the problem that you can’t follow instructions, or is Jesus just dicking you around? The reason I ask is because in 2008, Focus on the Family tried to frighten their vast mailing list of snake-handlers and early-onset dementia patients by sending out a letter with a set of predictions of what our nation would look like if we elected that Evil Count Chocula as our president.”

    (References 34 instances where Focus on the Family was wrong. Dead wrong. Totally wrong.)

    “Is there no penalty in America any more for just being wrong? Wrong. Forget ideology… you thought something in the future would go a certain way, great stakes were riding on whether you got it right, and you didn’t.” – Bill Maher, Feb. 2016.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Bruce388 says:

      “…especially gifted to discern the times and to prophesy….”

      Do they prophesy anything useful? Lottery numbers, perhaps?

      Like

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