News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs

Let’s listen as Ted the Theocrat declares a Christian-style Sharia law on the United States:

I listened to the entire, smarmy thing. And it was shocking. That was a full Christian Dominion declaration. It isn’t just that he openly said that only Republicans are Christians, or lied about Planned Parenthood selling baby parts (again), or even that zygotes will have constitutional rights; it’s that he made up his own version of the founding of the country, the Constitution, and the all the other documents as being liturgical.

This is an unpricipled man who will say anything in his quest for power, and I hate to think of what evil he would do if he got it.

He’s dangerous.

This entry was posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Ayatollah Ted Cruz. Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to News That Will Drive You To Drink

  1. Queasy says:

    Ted puts the turd in liturdgical.


  2. roket says:

    No wonder the theocrats love him. That sounded just like a sermon.


  3. moeman says:

    Obama is going to Cuba!!!


  4. HarpoSnarx says:

    Senator Ted Stilson will now pick out that lucky baby for a human shield. Praise Jeebus y’all.


  5. Osirisopto says:

    I wish there was a real law that anyone who seeks power should be denied it.

    I believe the reality in which he becomes president reinstates roadside crucifixion as a punishment.


  6. I don’t know what Cruz thinks he’s done for the hungry, the sick, the prisoner, or the refugee, but I know this sermon sounds quaint as hell from a person who likes carpet bombing.


    • Pupienus Maximus says:

      Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. Ezekiel 16:49

      “Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. You were hungry and thirsty, so I eliminated free meals and food banks. You were a stranger, so I vilified you and demanded that you were deported. You were naked, so I assumed you were an evil liberal who hates conservative values. You were sick, so I repealed your only hope for healthcare. You were in prison, so I tortured you.” – Republican Jesus


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