Claim Chowder: Immigration Civil War?

Engrish as a second language

Hey guys, remember how Y’all Qaeda and Wingnuttia were telling us that The Kenyan Usurper Barack HUSSEIN Obama was firing the first shots in a civil war by taking executive action on immigration?

President Obama’s looming executive action on immigration reform represents a Fort Sumter-type moment, according to conservative icon Phyllis Schlafly. Schlafly at first considered comparing the Obama amnesty to the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor but decided that Obama’s plan is much more subtle. “With Pearl Harbor, the American people knew what was happening,” she said.
But Fort Sumter, where the opening shots of the Civil War were fired, represented the beginning of a ruinous conflict, and Schlafly, like fellow conservative luminary Richard Viguerie, speculates that an executive amnesty might touch off a sort of modern-day conflagration.

–Ancient hate goblin Phyllis Schlafly

“What protects us in America from any kind of ethnic cleansing is the rule of law, of course,” Kobach responded. “And the rule of law used to be unassailable, used to be taken for granted in America. And now, of course, we have a president who disregards the law when it suits his interests. So, while I normally would answer that by saying, ‘Steve, of course we have the rule of law, that could never happen in America,’ I wonder what could happen. I still don’t think it’s going to happen in America, but I have to admit, things are strange and they are happening.”

Kris Kobach, professional hater and Kansas Secretary of State (same thing? Yes)

“Obama is making a powerful and dangerous symbolic declaration to large Spanish media audiences today comparing his new immigration orders to the violent Mexican revolution and civil war!” said William Gheen, President of ALIPAC. “Obama is timing his move to thwart the American public’s voice in Congress to coincide with Mexican Revolution Day and the Ferguson verdict while CBS, ABC, and NBC will keep most US citizens oblivious tonight!”

William Gheen, President of ALIPAC (I especially like his notion that Nov. 20 is Mexican Revolution Day is significant. It is also former Ambassador John Bolton’s birthday, so I guess two can play at that game.)

It seems that they might have been wringing their hands unnecessarily because by dawn’s early light, I see no wars (racial or otherwise) flaring up.

Anyway, I look forward to days, if not weeks, of Republican outreach to the Latino community. Heh.

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3 Responses to Claim Chowder: Immigration Civil War?

  1. roket says:

    It has been said that the revolution will not be televised. They didn’t broadcast Barrack Hussein Obama’s revolutionary speech last night so the war is already over.


  2. Weird Dave says:

    Best war ever!


  3. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© says:

    Of course, most of these dumbasses are on the Confederacy’s side. So as usual, they make no sense.


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