The GOP Has A Plan!

“The Republican National Committee is rolling out a plan to review what worked and what didn’t for the party in the 2012 cycle, appointing five people at the top of a committee that will make recommendations on things like demographics, messaging and fundraising.”

Introspection after being beaten like a cheap gong is probably a good thing. So who’s on this committee?

“The Growth and Opportunity Project is going to be chaired by RNC committee member Henry Barbour, longtime Jeb Bush adviser and political operative Sally Bradshaw, former George W. Bush press secretary Ari Fleischer, Puerto Rico RNC committee member Zori Fonalledas, and South Carolina RNC member Glenn McCall. Priebus, who is running for a second term, is holding a call with committee members to roll out the plan this afternoon.”

So let’s see, Haley Barbour 2 (Electric Boogaloo? Yes.), a Jeb Bush plant to ensure it works out in his favor (the Bush Crime Family Business), Chimpy’s Liar and famous Komen Race for the Cure saboteur Ari Fleischer, the Puerto Rican lady who was pretty much boo’ed off the stage at the RNC, and some guy from South Carolina, which thinks it is still the capitol of the Confederacy and might not be wrong about that. Oh, and that Anagram Reince Priebus who is the guy who totally bungled their effort in the 2012 Goat Rodeo. Well, then, carry on. What will they really be doing?

“The plan is to focus on: campaign mechanics, fundraising, demographics, messaging, outside groups, campaign finance, the national primary process and, last but not least, what the successful Democratic efforts revealed about the way forward, and recommend plans for the way forward, sources familiar with the plan said.”

You know, maybe the plan ought to be to find the right assortment of meds to give to your base? You know, the crazy people that scream “Commie” and then smear poo in their hair and run all around with Gadsden flags, three corner hats and inexplicably called themselves Teabaggers (until they found out what it meant)? You know, the ones who picked such sterling candidates as Akin and Mourdock, and who really lost the election across the board for your team. You should thank god for gerrymanders, or you guys would be sitting in ditches flinging poo at visitors to the DC zoo.

“Still, the source insisted that “the GOP has problems but they are solvable. We have to look at what we are doing right and what we’re doing wrong and lay out our vision and plans for Americans so everyone knows what we stand for. 2010 was the biggest mid-term win for one party since the 1938 election. Our ideas still resonate, but we need to examine what’s working and what isn’t. We have 30 Governors right now, but we want to listen and learn so we do better in presidential years as well.”

Well of course your problems are solvable: you can wait until the ancient white crackers die off. As for your ideas resonating, as the old Italian expression goes, the empty vessel rings the loudest.

Anyway, the Politico piece goes on and on, and no one is on the record, so this could all be just more hot gossip from their fevered imaginations. But I think it clearly shows that the GOP still doesn’t have a clue that they are dinosaurs thrashing about in the tar pits.

This entry was posted in 2012 Goat Rodeo, Wingnuttia. Bookmark the permalink.

0 Responses to The GOP Has A Plan!

  1. lambchop says:

    The gif matches the caption hilariously. I wonder what their recommendations will be on demographics – no women, no poor folk, no smart people allowed in their club.


  2. Dimitrios says:

    Actually, that meeting would end quicker if they tried to determine what went right.

    The GOP made made easier the work of comedians across the country and around the world. They added to the delight of satirists, parodists, absurdist, wiseacres and people of low humor.


  3. Bruce388 says:

    Keep making sweet love to that chicken.


  4. C Montgomery Burns says:

    So they have a plan and are no longer in free fall.

    In other words….

    They’ve gone right to Monty Python mode.

    As for me – I finally understand what an AssRocket is.



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