The Miracle of Acetyl Salicyclic Acid

Usage of the extracts from willow trees for the management of pain can be traced back to the earliest civilizations. Acetyl salicylic acid (modern day Aspirin) was first synthesized in 1853 by French chemist Charles Frederic Gerhardt. The research of aspirin for medicinal purposes was next taken up by Von Glim in 1859. He synthesized pure acetyl salicylic acid by a reaction of salicylic acid and acetyl chloride. The chemists at the German drug company Bayer started investigating the properties of acetyl salicylic acid. They found the molecule very promising and patented it in 1899. The name aspirin is derived from “A” from acetyl and “spirin” from old German word for salicylic acid – Spirsaure. By the 1980’s the medical community discovered that aspirin could be used for arthritis, treatments for colds, and to prevent heart attacks. Demonstrating the versatility of aspiring, a most decidedly non-medical SuperPac funder in 2012 showed that aspirin was great at developing the muscles around the knees and thus could prevent unwanted pregnancies.

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Truth in advertising? I thought Aspirin was not for children, but prevented them

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Get your kicks on Route 66.  The old roadside stand doesn’t old sell burgers and shakes anymore.

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Who knew a villain from Batman would actually be a leader in making the world safe from a Malthusian panic

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Another form of birth control from Rick Santorum, the tutelage of Foster Friess, would be a Mr. Softee

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The media needs get on Foster Friess’ case! – They have to have him explain just exactly how bow-legged women would be able to use aspirin as a form of birth control.

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7 Responses to The Miracle of Acetyl Salicyclic Acid

  1. LoL at Doctor Freeze!

    (I know it was Mister Freeze, but after all, he was Dr. Victor Fries.)


  2. grs says:

    Q: “Does centipede contraception require 100 aspirin?”
    A: “No, just 50, one for each pair of legs.”


  3. Some Techie says:

    First, I would eat the aspirin and thank her for providing a means of preventing a sudden heart attack. Then I’d proceed to …


  4. Pharmakeus Ubik says:

    Cool and cruel to see my nightmare Mr. Softee come to photoshopped life.


  5. Texas Betsy says:

    Wait, where’s the dairy queen in all this?


  6. Bruce388 says:

    I assume the Dairy Queen is home with Michele.


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