Bad Marketing, Cont.

H/T @NamelessCynic of the Twitterverse

Every dude just pulled up the boys and crossed his legs.

(No Rudy jokes, please.)

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News That Will Drive You to Drink

Happy Hour News

H/T Scissorhead Skinny-D

Egads! With 13 more days to the exciting conclusion of the 2020 Goat Rodeo, more than 40 million ballots have already been cast, and that is about 30% of the total number of votes cast in the 2016 Goat Rodeo.

When MPS tells the Peeple to vote, they listen!

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, 2020 Goat Rodeo | 2 Comments

Trump’s Stupidest Lawyer Makes Screen Debut

They say that the camera shows your soul.

Oh, dear Dawg, no:

“In the film, released on Friday, the former New York mayor and current personal attorney to Donald Trump is seen reaching into his trousers and apparently touching his genitals while reclining on a bed in the presence of the actor playing Borat’s daughter, who is posing as a TV journalist.

“Following an obsequious interview for a fake conservative news programme, the pair retreat at her suggestion for a drink to the bedroom of a hotel suite, which is rigged with concealed cameras. After she removes his microphone, Giuliani, 76, can be seen lying back on the bed, fiddling with his untucked shirt and reaching into his trousers. They are then interrupted by Borat who runs in and says: ‘She’s 15. She’s too old for you.’ …

“[Earlier,] flattered and flirtatious, he drinks scotch, coughs, fails to socially distance and claims Trump’s speedy actions in the spring saved a million Americans from dying of Covid. He also agrees – in theory at least – to eat a bat with his interviewer.”

I think I might hurl.

(H/T: too many of you gutter-minded Heathers, and I cannot thank you all enough.)

Posted in Wrong-Again Rudy | 15 Comments

The Harvest, Day 21

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Midday Palate Cleanser

Be careful ladies, that pup is a playa.

Posted in dogs, Palate Cleansers | 2 Comments

Endorsements!

Read All About it!

Scissorhead Baron vonBeavis alerts us:

Only 2 major US newspapers have endorsed Trump for reelection

and I’ll do a spoiler right now: one of ’em is Shelly Adelson’s Las Vegas Review-Journal. Adelson, as you might know, just donated $75M Ameros to Lord Damp Nut’s sinking campaign. So is it really an endorsement or is Shelly trying to recoup his losses? The other endorsement is from Arkansas, so you do the math (“Math! That wizardry! Burn the witch!,” Arkansaslers (is too a word!) didn’t scream, “On a good day Ah can count to 21 on mah hands and fingers!”)

You might already have read that USA Today, which is notoriously shy about endorsing anything, endorsed Joe Biden. I think it is a first.

 

Posted in 2020 Goat Rodeo, Lord Damp Nut, The Russian Usurper | 7 Comments

Death and Taxes, Cont.

“Noooooooo!”

 Trump Records Shed New Light on Chinese Business Pursuits

“Mr. Trump’s own business history is filled with overseas financial deals, and some have involved the Chinese state. He spent a decade unsuccessfully pursuing projects in China, operating an office there during his first run for president and forging a partnership with a major government-controlled company.

“And it turns out that China is one of only three foreign nations — the others are Britain and Ireland — where Mr. Trump maintains a bank account, according to an analysis of the president’s tax records, which were obtained by The New York Times. The foreign accounts do not show up on Mr. Trump’s public financial disclosures, where he must list personal assets, because they are held under corporate names. The identities of the financial institutions are not clear.

“The Chinese account is controlled by Trump International Hotels Management L.L.C., which the tax records show paid $188,561 in taxes in China while pursuing licensing deals there from 2013 to 2015.

[Ed. Please recall that Comrade Stupid paid $750 Ameroes to the US Gubmint. That is all. — TG]

“The tax records do not include details on how much money may have passed through the overseas accounts, though the Internal Revenue Service does require filers to report the portion of their income derived from other countries. The British and Irish accounts are held by companies that operate Mr. Trump’s golf courses in Scotland and Ireland, which regularly report millions of dollars in revenue from those countries. Trump International Hotels Management reported just a few thousand dollars from China.”

Everytime Prznint Stupid accuses someone else of something, it is the crime he himself has committed. It’s projection and confession, and I would pay attention not just to him bleating Chy-Na, but listen to him as he talks about Biden et al treason. He’s confessing to that, too. Bank on it.

Posted in Lord Damp Nut, The Russian Usurper, Tax Cheat, Taxes | 7 Comments

Ah, Texas!

The U.S. Lab for Bad Policy

Guys, Gov. Abbott is at it again:

Texas social workers can now turn away LGBTQ clients and those with a disability.

The state Board of Social Work Examiners voted unanimously to change a section of its code of conduct last week following a recommendation from Gov. Greg Abbott, a Republican, to remove protections for sexual orientation, gender identity and disability. Abbott’s office said the change was suggested because the board’s nondiscrimination clause went beyond the state’s policy on social work, according to The Associated Press.

I guess Abbott is getting ready to celebrate Judge Coathangers ascension to the Supreme Court, because this is surely headed her way. It’s weird tho, because Abbott himself is disabled, but he pulled himself up by his own wheelchair, I guess.

Posted in Bastards, Crazeee States, Homophobia, Rat Bastards, Texas, America's Lab for Bad Policy, Transphobia, We Don't Serve Your Kind | 2 Comments

Follow the Ameroes!

Stable Jenius

Regular readers know that I don’t particularly pay attention to horse-race journalism. The money chase is boring and as big donors can pour in buckets of money (hi Shelly Adelson!), so totals don’t equal enthusiasm.

Anyway, on the day in 2017 Prznint Stupid was sworn into office, he signed the papers starting his 2020 Goat Rodeo re-election campaign and started fundraising. As has been widely reported, his treasure chest of raised funds was alleged to be over $1B Ameroes.

So what happened to all that cheddar? Oh, you know, stupid decisions and grifting:

— Over $7.4 million spent at Trump-branded properties since 2017.

— At least $35.9 million spent on Trump merchandise.

— $39 million in legal and “compliance” fees. In addition to tapping the RNC and his campaign to pay legal costs during his impeachment proceedings, Trump has also relied on his political operation to cover legal costs for some aides.

— At least $15.1 million spent on the Republican National Convention. The event was supposed to be in Charlotte, North Carolina, but Trump relocated it to Jacksonville, Florida, after a dispute with North Carolina’s Democratic governor over coronavirus safety measures. The Florida event was ultimately canceled, with a mostly online convention taking its place. Disclosures show the RNC still spent $1 million at the Ritz Carlton Amelia Island, near Jacksonville.

— $912,000 spent on ads that ran on the personal Facebook pages of Parscale and Trump spokesperson Katrina Pierson.

— A $250,000 ad run during Game 7 of the 2019 World Series, which came after Trump was booed by spectators when he attended Game 5.

— At least $218,000 for Trump surrogates to travel aboard private jets provided by campaign donors.

— $1.6 million on TV ads in the Washington, D.C., media market, an overwhelmingly Democratic area where Trump has little chance of winning but where he is a regular TV watcher.

And my personal favorite: $100k went to the literary aspirations of Junior Mints -“Nearly $100,000 [was] spent on copies of Donald Trump Jr.’s book Triggered, which helped propel it to the top of the New York Times bestsellers list.”

One of the laughable lies that pushed Prznint Apprentice into the White House was that he was a genius businessman who would use his Art of the Deal negotiating skills to Make America Great Allegedly. But we know in reality that he is totally a failure who put six companies into bankruptcy and accrued so many losses that he basically never paid income taxes.

 

Posted in 2020 Goat Rodeo, Grifters Gotta Grift, Lord Damp Nut, The Russian Usurper, snark | 6 Comments

UPDATED: 60 Minutes Is Gonna Be Must-see TeeVee

Trumper tantrum

Guys, Lord Damp Nut sat down with 60 Minutes’ Lesley Stahl for the final interview of the 2020 Goat Rodeo. I’m guessing it wasn’t very good. He stormed out.

We note that Prznint Stupid—who still refuses to wear a mask, and who contracted the virus because he’s a moron—tweeted what appears to be a surreptitiously recorded video of Stahl not wearing a mask and tried to shame her, which is totally what  someone does who’s confident in how their campaign is going would do.

We submit into evidence:

 

and followed by:

and…

I dunno about you, but when the subject of the interview —who just stormed out of said interview— immediately turns around and shames and then threatens the interviewer, well… it’s not a good look.

All of this on top of the news that Prznint Grabby McGrabber is losing the educated, white woman suburban voter of a certain age, and you’ll never guess who the 60 Minutes demo is: educated, white, suburban women of a certain age. Also: Stahl easily is an avatar of her demographic: a very successful, obviously well-educated white suburban woman.

Well-played. Eleventy-dimensional chess, that move.

UPDATE 1 – it must be really bad. Mark Meadows is out spinning:

UPDATE 2 – at his rally last night:

Posted in 2020 Goat Rodeo, Lord Damp Nut, The Russian Usurper, sexism, War on Women | 7 Comments