Bad Placement, Cont.

“Is the guppy fresh?”

Posted in Bad Placement | 2 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News

H/T @NamelessCynic on the tweeters

I’m really glad that CNN is looking into the double-secret probation, er, claims of a standing order to declassify something/anything/everything if twice-impeached LOSER ex-Prznint Stupid took it out of the White House, you know, as “homework”:

CNN Exclusive: ‘Ludicrous.’ ‘Ridiculous.’ ‘A complete fiction.’: Former Trump officials say his claim of ‘standing order’ to declassify is nonsense

Washington (CNN)In the days since the FBI seized classified and top secret documents from Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago resort, the former President and his allies have claimed that Trump had a “standing order” to declassify documents he took from the Oval Office to the White House residence.

But 18 former top Trump administration officials tell CNN they never heard any such order issued during their time working for Trump, and that they believe the claim to be patently false.

Gee, maybe if CNN talked to 19… /snark but I interrupted. Do continue.

Several officials laughed at the notion. One senior administration official called it “bullsh*t.” Two of Trump’s former chiefs of staff went on the record to knock down the claim.

Yeah, Kelly and Mulvaney. Who else?

In addition, CNN spoke with former national security and intelligence officials as well as White House lawyers and Justice Department officials. Taken together, their tenure covers all four years of the Trump administration, and many served in positions where they would either be included in the declassification process, or at the very least, be aware of such orders.

Official after official scoffed at the claim Trump had a standing order to declassify documents that left the Oval Office and were taken to the residence.
“Total nonsense,” one senior White House official said. “If that’s true, where is the order with his signature on it? If that were the case, there would have been tremendous pushback from the Intel Community and DoD, which would almost certainly have become known to Intel and Armed Services Committees on the Hill.”

Anyway, when we first heard this stupid declassification claim we Scissorheads called BS on it, and we remain undefeated.

Posted in 4th Reich, espionage, Hair Führer Donald Trump | 2 Comments

Lunchtime Reading

MPS is purrrr-fect.

Vanity Fair has a cut-out-and-keep guide to all the current law suits that Hair Füror is litigating (along with a brief description of them), and it is a lot bigger list than I realized. Being VF, it has a subtle headline:


And it goes on to list (I think) 17 law suits as of this writing, including the ones currently in the news and some that have slipped off the front pages. It’s very funny and well worth the click and being one of the freebies of the month.

Posted in Hair Führer Donald Trump | 2 Comments

Midday Palate Cleanser

I never get invited to the cool parties.

Posted in Palate Cleansers | 2 Comments

Shouldda Called Saul

Lord Damp Nut is not a monster, he’s just ahead of the curve.

Guys, you might have heard by now that Lord Damp Nut is in a little bit of legal trouble, what with pending investigations and whatnot around his stealing classified documents for some unknown and unknowable reason (totally not gonna say he planned to sell them, which he totally did), and you know, he needs to find better lawyers to represent him than Rudy Giuliani:

Trump is rushing to hire seasoned lawyers — but he keeps hearing ‘No’

The former president’s current legal team includes a Florida insurance lawyer who’s never had a federal case, a past general counsel for a parking-garage company and a former host at far-right One America News

Well, that’s delightfully embarrassing! Tell us more, WaPo!

Trump is no stranger to legal proceedings, and his scramble to hire lawyers in the face of an ominous federal probe recalls his predicament in the summer of 2017, when he was under scrutiny from special counsel Robert S. Mueller III in the Russia probe. Once again, Trump is struggling to find a veteran criminal defense lawyer with a strong track record of dealing with the Justice Department in a sprawling, multipronged investigation.


Ordinarily, the prestige and publicity of representing a former president, as well as the new and complex legal issues at stake in this case, would attract high-powered attorneys. But Trump’s search is being hampered by his divisiveness, as well as his reputation for stiffing vendors and ignoring advice.

Come on, let’s get to the fun stuff!

People familiar with the search for legal help said the effort includes Susie Wiles, a close adviser to Trump, and attorney Christina Bobb, who was present at Mar-a-Lago during the search and signed for the list of documents taken. Former campaign adviser Boris Epshteyn is taking a prominent role, and former White House aide Kash Patel is advising informally. Patel is raising money for a “legal offense” fund by selling merchandise such as tank tops and beanies emblazoned with the logo “K$H.”

ka-CHING! Got our first set of ninnies and grifters!

Bobb’s prior legal experience at the federal level consists mainly of a handful of trademark infringement cases on behalf of CrossFit during a stint at a San Diego law firm. She did not respond to requests for comment.

Trump’s other lawyer currently based in Florida is Lindsey Halligan, whose practice, according to a professional biography, focuses on insurance claims at residential and commercial properties. She was admitted to the Florida bar in 2014. A search of federal court records found no filings under her name. She did not respond to requests for comment.

Trump is also being represented in the records dispute by Alina Habba, who leads a three-attorney firm with an office near Trump’s golf club in Bedminster, N.J. Her professional experience includes serving as general counsel to a parking garage company.

Anyway, more proof that Trump hires only the best people.

Posted in Hair Führer Donald Trump, People Dumber than Dolphins, The Law | 13 Comments

Experts Weigh In On Inflation Reduction Act

I’ll say.

And now, economic forecast from Junior Mints, who totally gets it:

And what can we conclude from this? Snorty McCokespoon’s emotional security cougar Kimberly Guilfoyle had the night off.

Posted in Junior Mint’s Emotional Support Cougar Kimberly Guilfoyle, Junior Mints, The Miracle of the Trump Economy, Trump Crime Family | 9 Comments

And Now, A Musical Interlude

Posted in snark | 1 Comment

Need A Refill on Your Stupid, RoJo?

“And my fifth point…”

RoJo explains to us that voting fraud is, you know, bad, except when it’s not:

Wisconsin, you guys have a chance to get rid of this moron.

Posted in 2022 Pie Fight, Crazeee States, RoJo, Wisconsin | 6 Comments

One Lump of Stupid, or Two, Alabama Republicans?

Sweet, sweet relief


MONTGOMERY, Ala. (AP) — A Republican group in Alabama is apologizing after accidentally using a picture of the GOP elephant that contained Ku Klux Klan imagery.

The Lawrence County Republican Party intended to post an image of the GOP elephant on its Facebook page, but ended up using one in which the white spaces between the animal’s legs were drawn to resemble hooded Klansmen.

A party official said the image was taken from the results of a Google search and that the image was immediately replaced once the mistake was detected.

It’s telling that no one at that Alabama GOP HQ noticed it, now innit?

“I would like to offer a deep and sincere apology for a picture that temporarily appeared on this page last night. A google search picture of a GOP elephant was used and later found to have hidden images that do not represent the views or beliefs of the Lawrence County Republican Party,” Shannon Terry wrote in a Facebook post apologizing for the use of the image.

“As chairman I take full responsibility for the error,” Terry added.

You can see the image here.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead D-Cap)

Posted in Alabama, Crazeee States, People Dumber than Dolphins, racism, White Punks on Dope, Wingnuttia | 5 Comments

Bad Signs, Cont.

H/T @NamelessCynic

Now that’s a serious fire hazard!

Posted in snark | 1 Comment