Day 4

MPS Non-coverage of the Olympics

Despite the $77,000 tax deduction and being one of the horse elite – Ann just couldn’t make it through the dressage. YOU judges need to give the rich a break once in awhile

london 2012 3c

Was Willard watching his wife? Not a chance. Mr “Oh To Be In London” was too busy at beach volleyball to worry about how his tax deduction wife was faring.

london 2012 2b

Abortion Field Trips! Yippee!

Ahh, it was a busy day for Notorious baby mill operator, future resident of Bedlam, and self-confessed confident of God, Bachmann-the-Nut.

Today, finishing her work on the ACORN beat (she grilled Bennie the Rat Bernanke on ACORN earlier, and no one understands what the Fed Chairman has to do with ACORN, but that is The Nut’s way…) and turned her walnut-sized brain and googly eyes on teen pregnancies. You see, buried in the healthcare bill is something rather plain and practical: funding clinics for schools. My school had a nurse, btw, and it was very good to have someone put on the Bactine and the bandaid right there. But The Nut sees things differently.

You see, in The Nut’s world, everyone is a sinner, every man, woman, and especially children. So having a school nurse means that kids are getting third period off to go get abortions, and then returning to school in time to catch the bus home.

And they don’t even have to be cheerleaders. Go figure.

Bachmann-the-Nut: Energy=Tyranny

Noted baby mill operator and future resident of Bedlam, Michele Bachmann, gets an unguarded mic for one minute and does not disappoint! Without citing any sources, The Nut managed to bleat out unsubstantiated claims about what the cost of the Cap and Trade bill will cost, how many jobs will be lost (2.5 million jobs per year!), and that it is tyranny, because, well because it is.

Bachmann-the-Nut Chronicles continue!

When last we left notorious baby-mill operator and future resident of Bedlam, Bachmann-the-Nut was stating, for the record that she found it interesting the last swine flu pandemic happened under Jimmy Carter, except of course it was Gerald Ford.

So imagine my delight when reading the delightful Dump Bachman the following letter to the editor in a Minnesota newspaper:

I find it interesting that the first confirmed Minnesota case of H1N1 Influenza A occurred in Rep. Michele Bachmann’s district. I’m not blaming this on Michele Bachmann, I just think it’s an interesting coincidence.

– AMY HUSTON, EAGAN

Bachmann-the-Nut on hate crimes legislation

With all the noise surrounding Virginia Foxx’s crazy rant that Matthew Shepherd was not gay bashed to death, our favorite Crazy, famed baby mill operator and future resident of Bedlam was quietly spewing her own special brand of hate:

Apparently people who are practicing pedophiles would be considered protected under this legislation, but not, I understand, veterans, not, I understand, pregnant women, not, I understand, 85-year-old grandmothers would be protected under this law. But who would be protected? A pedophile, someone who considers themselves gay, someone who considers themselves transgender, someone who considers themselves a cross-dresser? That is who is protected.

Swine Flu over the cuckoo’s nest: the Bachmann Edition!

Baby mill operator and future resident of Bedlam, Bachmann-the-Nut, has consulted with the finest physicians in the world and concluded that Democratic presidents are a factor in swine flu epidemics, noting that the last outbreak happened in the ’70s under Jimmy Carter.

Except that it didn’t.

It happened under Gerald Ford.

Bachmann-the-Nut, Scientist

What ever happened to security at the Nuthatch? How can they protect us from Right Wing Extremist Jihadists, when once again, Bachmann-the-Nut, notorious baby mill operator and future resident of Bedlam, slipped her bonds. Somehow Michele “the Flying Imams” Bachmann found an unguarded mic and decided to present to us her ground-breaking scientific theory CO2 Is A Natural Byproduct of Nature. I especially like her to tell us to look at a pie chart to see carbon dioxide.