Happy Hour News Briefs

News that will drive you to drink

Free-range conspiracy theorist Glenn Beck is not one to doubt that Sweet Baby Jeebus communicates to us through the miracle of pancakes.

  • Numbers don’t lie – But infamous hate group (Southern Poverty Law Center designate) Family Research Council does. Anyway, they commissioned a poll of Republicans that shows 80+% of ‘em are bigots opposed to marriage equality. Whodathunkit? (Family Research Council)
  • This over-the-top lie from Rafael Cruz, father of Canadian-born latino and immigrant-hating southern white supremacist Senator Ted Cruz:

    “All we have to do is turn on the news and every day we see more and more encroachment upon pastors from this administration,” Cruz said. “All they have to do is be aware of what’s happening around us and to be aware, for example, that in the city of San Antonio, if a pastor speaks on Romans 1, he could be even fined $500 a day until he retracts what he said.”

  • Eiron, the Goddess of Irony, laughed so hard she farted:

    “Preaching against homosexuality in our day is about as popular as preaching against slavery and racism in Charleston, South Carolina, in 1861,” said Greear. “And back then, I’m sure the politically correct people were like, ‘You’re just creating a lot of waves that are unnecessary, just preach the gospel.’”

    (The Blaze: ‘Stop Spreading Falsehoods’: Southern Baptists Hash Out Views on Gays, Porn and Pastoral Mistakes During Landmark Summit )

Those who do not learn from history…

…are really f***ing stupid:

Example A is Teabagger Marilinda Garcia, who is a candidate for Congress from New Hampshire.

Gosh, you know, as a student of history (OK, it was one of my undergraduate majors), I kinda-sort know that the people of Jamestown did not starve to death because they lacked private property. They starved to death from because they did not grow food.

So why, you ask, did they not grow any food? They were being good little capitalists, and trying make it big in the mercantile economy by growing exotic crops to export to England (and presumably to return as rich as kings); they were not trying to grow subsistence crops.

So, you could say that Capitalism killed the Jamestown Colony, or the Invisible Hand killed them, or even that they all went Galt with greed. But you cannot say that they died from collectivism. That’s just stupid.

When Bigots Complain About…

…Republicans stealing their ideas, you know that the ideas must really suck:

KKK Goes to Church

Last year, we reported that VDARE writer John Derbyshire (formerly of the National Review) was annoyed that prominent Republicans were failing to credit racist VDARE writer Steve Sailer when they advocated a plan nearly identical to the ‘Sailer Strategy’: that is, the idea that the GOP can only survive by solidifying and growing its white base while alienating people of color. Sailer had been persistently advocating this tactic for over a decade when it suddenly came into vogue among conservatives who opposed the Gang of Eight’s immigration reform plan.

Now, another VDARE writer is upset that more and more immigration reform opponents are pushing another VDARE argument without giving the white nationalists credit. This time, the argument is that steady or increased legal immigration – with or without a path to citizenship for undocumented immigrations – will ruin the Republican party because immigrants are inherently liberal.

In a post on Friday, VDARE writer James Fulford highlights a recent study from the Center for Immigration Studies which argues that Republicans shouldn’t bother with immigration reform because immigrants will inevitably vote for Democrats. Fulford complains that neither the CIS report nor the conservative outlets covering it “manages to credit Peter Brimelow or VDARE.com for saying all this early and often, possibly because it they’re scared of Media Matters and the SPLC.” As he notes, VDARE has been pushing the argument since as early as 2001.

So bigot-on-bigot mud wrestling is a thing? I mean at least they all agree that the GOP should be the White People’s Party (good news: they are head of schedule).

However, the 2012 Goat Rodeo already proved that white people alone can’t control the outcome of an election. A) Whites are not a monolithic voting block and B) the numbers don’t work in their favor. Sorry Bigots!

All that said, I’m amused that VDARE is fighting for credit on this crappy idea—it’s like saying that you deserve a bonus for having only one hull on the Titanic. They’re like the dinosaurs thrashing about in the tarpits, they just haven’t figured it out yet.

(Right Wing Watch)

The Morning Quote

“It’s our hope and prayer that a fresh obedience by Christian families and educating their children according to biblical commands will prove to be a key for the revival of our families, our churches, and our nation.”

Ray Moore, GOP Candidate for Lt. Governor of South Carolina (Seething Hotbed of Unbridled Lust), who is a retired Army Reserves chaplain and president of Frontline Ministries, encouraging citizens of that state to take their kids out of Public Schools. That’s quite a platform to have while running for Public Office.

(Bonus quote: “Moore told a gathering of Tea Party activists at the April 12 Liberty Rally that Christians must leave the “Pharaoh’s school system” for religious schools or home schools.

“We cannot win this war we’re in as long as we keep handing our children over to the enemy to educate,” he told the crowd.)

(Raw Story)

Karma is a bitch, cont.

Puppet Show and GOP

  1. Hey guys, remember that time when Daniel Clevenger mayor of Marionville, Mo said that he kinda-sorta agreed with Frazier Glenn Miller, the white supremacist and anti-semite, who (allegedly) shot up a Jewish cultural center and killed three people? It seems Clevenger kinda-sorta regrets saying it as he has definitely resigned as mayor of Marionville, you know, under pressure. (Livewire)

  2. jeebus light switch

    Also last week, you might remember LA Republican state Representative Thomas Carmody introduced a bill naming the Christian Bible as the official state book, which of course passed from conference 8-5 and moved into the state Senate for a vote. Whoopsie! It seems that someone there remembered their Civics 101 class had something about The Separation of Church and State. Anyway Carmody has now abandoned the effort because it has “become a distraction.” (Raw Story — the linked story at the Times-Picayune has reaction from Louisiana residents, which is worth the read.)

Happy Hour News Briefs

News that will drive you to drink

Your Daily Gohmert: Screwie Louie wants Congress to arrest (walking dead?) US Attorney General Eric Holder.

  • Rev. Fishsticks again is thinking about what goes on when gay Boy Scouts pitch a pup tent. So to speak. (American Family Association)
  • Free-range conspiracy theorist Glenn Beck is upset that he never got a thank you note from The Stench. (The Blaze)
  • Let us sing the praises of waterboarding enthusiast Sean InSanity just like his greatest fan, should-be evicted, deadbeat renter Cliven Bundy. (Media Matters)

Both sides…

gregory surreal

One of the really interesting reactions to the news that Dancin’ Dave is on the ropes at NBC—to the point that they hired some sort of psychologist to talk to his circle of friends—is the reaction that this is having on the left and right side of the blogosphere. It seems everyone hates Dancin’ with the Gregory, not just us Commie vituperative foul-mouth bloggers of the left. Here’s a small rundown of Wingnuttia, who of course hate everyone in the lamestream media, even when those people are their toadies and minions:

  • Ann Althouse: What is NBC going to do about the post-Russert crashing ratings of “Meet the Press”?
  • Hot Air: NBC wonders: What makes David Gregory tick?
  • NewsBusters: NBC Tried ‘Unusual’ Psychological Assessment to Figure Out David Gregory and His Flagging ‘Meet The Press’ Ratings
  • The Daily Caller: NBC wants to know what’s wrong with David Gregory
  • And bringing up the rear, Noah Rothman at Mediaite: NBC Allegedly Hired ‘Psychological’ Consultant to Evaluate David Gregory; NBC Counters