Fashion Week Continues!

fashion cold outside

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Mr. C. Montgomery Burns)

Unsaddle That Goat: Zombie-Eyed Granny-Starver Is Out

Goat Rodeo goat down

Notorious Snidely Whiplash wannabe Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Ayn Rand) has decided that he would rather inflict pain on the Poors and the Olds than be Preznint:

“I have decided that I am not going to run for president in 2016,” Ryan said in a phone interview, noting that he is “at peace” with the decision he made “weeks ago” to forgo a bid for the White House…

The nine-term congressman believes he can make that “big difference” in his new role as chairman of the influential House Ways and Means Committee rather than as a presidential contender…

“It’s clear the country needs a change in direction and our party has a responsibility to offer a real alternative,” he said, adding that, as chairman of his House committee, he will help “lay out conservative solutions that will help our nominee lead us to victory.”

You bet he will. Republicans would fight amongst themselves to be the one to tell Oliver Twist he cannot have more soup.

Fashion Week Continues!

(Telegraphy UK)

A look that is as fresh as tomorrow, gents, so get your gams ready for Spring!

Eiron, the Goddess of Irony, laughed so hard she farted

rick-santorum-busy-fist

“Do we really want someone with this little experience? And the only experience they have basically — not Rubio, but Cruz and Paul because I don’t think Rubio is going to go — is bomb throwing? Do we really want somebody who’s a bomb thrower, with no track record of any accomplishments?”

–that man of accomplishment, likely 2016 Goat Rodeo Contender Rick ‘Google Me’ Santorum

Y’all Qaeda Looking For A George Wallace…

to send out the National Guard to stop the ‘mos from marrying:

[Randy Thomasson, a veteran pro-family leader with Campaign for Children and Families/SaveCalifornia.com] sent a letter out Jan. 7 to 25 pro-family organizations asking them to step up the pressure on Republican governors to use the powers granted to them by their state constitutions to defend marriage. Those powers include the ability to forbid county clerks from changing marriage forms or issuing licenses to same-sex couples, and even calling out the National Guard, Thomasson said.

I wonder what legal grounds Thomasson found to call out the National Guard?

— Marriage licenses are not in the U.S. Constitution, so federal judges have no authority here.

Tell us more about how this would work:

In view of the current crisis on marriage, a constitutional governor can and should do the following:

  • Announce he took an oath to obey the constitution, not to obey a judge’s unconstitutional opinion.
  • Announce that no homosexual “marriage” licenses will be issues, and no county clerk is permitted to issue marriage licenses to anyone other than a qualified man and woman.
  • Utilize the support of the state attorney general (if that constitutional officer is willing to stand alongside) or use the state’s National Guard to enforce the law at county clerk’s offices.

That’s pretty air-tight thinking right there, Sparky. Cannot imagine what could go wrong with that.

One Lump of Stupid, Or Two?

Pastor Eric Dammann of the Bible Baptist Church of Hasbrouck Heights, New Jersey has a way with kids:

You think that they are going to let him lead a youth group again?

A Little Goes A Long Way

Triumph, the insult Comic Dog is getting his own show. He will have a sidekick: Jack McBrayer

Sunday Schadenfreude: Bill Donohue Edition

This is a long clip, but I think you’ll enjoy Hugh Hewitt rip ol’ hateful Bill a new hole. When two fundies fight, everyone wins.

The Morning Tweet

It’s really all said in the response to documentarian fabulist, convicted felon, fired Y’all Qaeda business school dean, and would-be bigamist D’VORCE D’SPOUSA.