Good Luck With That, Paul Ryan

Hiway-to-Hell

Brown paper bag fabulist and Zombie-eyed Granny-starver Paul Ryan will meet with the Congressional Black Caucus (the Blah Caucus to Rick Santorum) as part of his on-going damage control after dog whistling on Bill ‘Sporting Life’ Bennett’s electronic radio program about the lazy blah (Hi Rick!) men of the inner city.

(Livewire)

The Washington Monthly has a very good article up on Paul Ryan’s dog whistle and what Ryan doesn’t understand about race and poverty, as does Campaign for America’s Future. I recommend both, short reads.

Happy Hour News Briefs

Drink-up, Bitchez!

Rev. Fishsticks mansplains that feminists want to be like men because they are insecure about their own femininity.

  • The Brilliant Stratagem of Steve Stockman’s Campaign - And now it can be told: the goal was never about winning the nomination against Sen. John Cornyn; the goal was to bankrupt Turdblossom so other Teabaggers will have a fighting chance against all that money! (World Nut Daily)
  • The Pride of Ownership - Xristian Xrazie Dr. Scott Lively of Defend the Family tells OneNewsNow the Golden State now is under the complete control of the Gay Menace.
  • Regrets, He’s Had A Few - And now for an apology from Austin Ruse, who heads the Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute (C-Fam, a Southern Poverty Law Center designated hate-group), and a writer for conservative outlets such as Breitbart News and The Daily Caller who said that liberal academics should be “taken out and shot”:

    I deeply regret and apologize for using the expression “taken out and shot” on the Sandy Rios Show this week. It was not intended to be taken literally. I have dedicated my life and career to ending violence. I regret that these poorly chosen words are being used to attack my friends at American Family Radio and American Family Association.

    Mr. Ruse’s contract with noted hate group American Family Radio and Association has been terminated. (Livewire)

News Briefs for March 14, 2014

News you can use all day

news reporter

  • Take one for the team - America’s foremost conservative gay intellectual, Andrew Sullivan stands up for the hapless, conservative, gay self-loathing Brandon Ambrosino. (Sully is tired of being the only gay diversity poster boy of the right? Yes.) “Finally,” Sullivan did not say, “I can take a vacation and he can offer cover to the bigots.” (Livewire)
  • A Confederation of Dunces - At least three challengers of Senatorette Huckleberry Closetcase’s Senate seat have signed a pledge to support one another if any one of them makes it into a run-off. And promptly thereafter one of them called Miss Lindsey Graham “ambiguously gay” and the other two distanced themselves from him. Sorry boys, you’re bound to each other now. (Livewire)
  • Journalism! - Reason, the well-known journal of libertarians, did an investigative piece of how the moocher and takers are using and abusing taxpayer money food assistance program’s debit cards to buy dildoes from adult toy stores, natch. Except that it is not true. (Raw Story)

Happy Hour News Briefs

News that will drive you to drink

  • That Lovable Pope - Maybe it’s just the contrast from Benny-the-Rat, but everyone seems to love Pope Francis amiright? Ha-ha, Trick Question! No, you see, the Xristian Xrazies think that he might be the False Prophet, who is mentioned in the Book of Revelation, you know, what with all his tolerance and whatnot. Clearly the man is EVIL incarnate! (Christian Wire)
  • How to Win Races, Wingnuttian-style -It’s E-Z as 1-2-3, Bread! Tom Pauken—political analyst and former Texas gubernatorial candidate who served on St. Ronnie’s White House staff and later became chairman of the Republican Party in Texas—says that there is a silent majority of Americans who are disgusted with social liberalism and the Hollywood culture, and admire anyone willing to stand up for traditional values. And that is why a special election in Florida for a congressional seat held for 30+ years by the Republicans was won by a Republican. (One News Now)
  • Power Outage in DC: Proof that God Hates Dims and Doesn’t Believe in Global Climate Change - Crazy Unkka Pat wandered down the hall at the Shady Rest and found an unattended broadcast studio again… (Raw Story)

The Afternoon Quote – Bad Management Edition

In an interview on Wednesday evening, Klein told me he hadn’t read the pieces that had kicked up so much dust before bringing Ambrosino on, but did so once he began facing criticism for the hire.

Lemme get this right: Ezra Klein hired a writer without reading his published work? Sweet Baby Jeebus on the re-write desk! If I were the Vox sugar daddy, I’d be cancelling the project right about now.

(Media Matters)