When You Fight Redefining Marriage…

…by redefining fasting:

Xristians Against Masturbation

Virginia-based anti-gay group Family Foundation has announced a fast in opposition to same-sex marriage – but participants will be be allowed to eat, reports Pink News.

The group’s 40 Days of Prayer, Fasting and Repentance For Marriage started on August 27th and runs until October 5th, the day before the Supreme Court begins its next session and hears the first in a series of same-sex marriage appeals cases.

However, not wanting to expend too much energy on hatred, the group announced “we are asking the entire Body of Christ to join us for this feast – giving up physical food isn’t necessary – but feeding on the spiritual food provided is vital.”

An, Xristian Xrazies: they can have their cake and eat it, too.


Petunia: “Want Fries With Your Stupid?”

So… let me get this right: a public school in Florida, funded by tax-payer dollars, had a program wherein a Xristian Xrazie pastor was foisted on the football team? And Petunia and Pals thinks that it is unconstitutional to end that program?

Somewhere, my high school civics teacher is weeping.

Ken Ham Isn’t Hiring!

Jeebus on a dino

Jeebus on a dino and zip-line ministries founder Ken Hamm’s latest grift, The Ark Encounter, has yet to get off the ground (er, on the zip line? In the water?) in Kentucky, and they are re-applying for a state tax incentive of more than $18 million because, well, time ran out on their last grift. Anyway, they are hiring!:

“Our work at Ark Encounter is not just a job, it is also a ministry. Our employees work together as a team to serve each other to produce the best solutions for our design requirements. Our purpose through the Ark Encounter is to serve and glorify the Lord with our God-given talents with the goal of edifying believers and evangelizing the lost.”

…which should make that whole First Amendment thingy kinda shudder, you know, with the state giving money to a fundamentalist Xristian Xrazie.

“But what about Dawson?,” as they used to say in the ’90s. Yes, Ken Ham has plans to discriminate against anyone who isn’t as nutty as he is:

The ad has specific religious requirements for employment. These include a salvation testimony, a “creation belief statement” and a requirement that applicants agree with the organization’s “statement of faith.” This required statement includes articles that imply that fundamentalist Christianity is the only acceptable religion and that denigrate non-Christians non-fundamentalist Christians, and homosexuals (regardless of their theological views).

Nice work if you can get it.


Xristian Xrazie Wants To Outlaw Boobs

I don’t know how I missed this news story from last week… “A prominent pro-life activist has called to ban all public nudity because he said that topless dancers who protested at his church had committed an “offense to God.””

“I am sick that women can legally bare their breasts to children and to married men against their will in Ohio,” he wrote on his Facebook page following last week’s protest.

…Johnson told WSYX that “what they did was an offense to God, was an offense to the public morality, and the legislature should act to criminalize what they did.”

Oh, how those married men must have suffered.

Working As Designed


A new study finds that lesbians, gay men and bisexuals (LGB) who sought mental health treatment from health care providers were no less likely to attempt suicide than LGB people who did not seek any treatment at all, but seeking help from religious or spiritual sources was associated with higher odds of a suicide attempt. The study, entitled, “The Role of Help-Seeking in Preventing Suicide Attempts among Lesbians, Gay Men, and Bisexuals,” is co-authored by Ilan H. Meyer, Williams Institute, UCLA School of Law, Merilee Teylan, Medical School, Harvard University, and Sharon Schwartz, Department of Epidemiology, Columbia University.

The ball is in your court, Marcus.

(Williams Institute)

Rand Paul Keeps On Running…

…away from his previous positions.

Rand Paul wants to be left alone

“When you’re in the neonatal nursery and you’ve got a one-pound baby, everybody acknowledges that that baby has rights, the Bill of Rights applies to that baby and nobody can hurt that baby. It’s a one-pound baby. But a week before, even a full-term seven-pound baby has no rights, according to the way people are looking at it, and I think that is a big mistake.”

– Famous plagiarist, Ayn Rand Fanboi, likely 2016 Goat Rodeo Contender and Hair Club for Men most wanted list designate Sen. Aqua Buddha, who recently said that he wouldn’t try to knock down Roe V. Wade, you know, when he was NOT talking to the Xristians. He has introduced Personhood legislation in Congress, which his idol Ayn Rand would hate.

The Dog Ate My Homework…

Bless the beasts and the children

Bless the beasts and the children

…and was Raptured up to sit by Baby Jeebus in Heaven:

A Texas court ruled this month that parents who allegedly stopped homeschooling their kids because they believed Jesus Christ was returning to Earth were not exempt from state education regulations.

… Tracy overhead one of the McIntyre children tell a cousin that they did not need to do schoolwork because they were going to be raptured,” the court document noted.

There are many things that could be improved with our public schools, but the problems with the alternatives are legendary.

Here’s Your Sunday Endless Mimosa of Stupid

Because being gay is exactly like your out-of-control spoiled brat:

“If my son throws food across the table and I say, ‘Bailey, stop throwing food’ and he says ‘I’m sorry Dad, I’m just a food-thrower.’ It’s like no you’re not, your behavior is not you. It doesn’t define you. So its very important that we speak to the fact that homosexuality is a sin that can only be redeemed by God when we repent. But the idea of a ‘homosexual agenda’ that seeks to capture the nation and capture childrens’ curriculum and capture television and entertainment and laws – that is an idea that is evil and wrong and needs to be dealt with.”

–Frosted-tips Twin David Benham speaking at Hate-a-Palooza (The Family Leadership Summit led by Bob Vander Plaats).