Category Archives: Xristian Xraxies

News That Will Drive You To Drink

The Happy Hour News Briefs And so speaketh Student Council Preznint-for-Life Marco Rubio: [Obama is] Always pitting people against each other. Always. Look at today: he gave a speech at a mosque. Oh, you know, basically implying that America is … Continue reading

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Marco 'Big Gulp' Rubio, Xristian Xraxies, Y'all Qaeda | 5 Comments

And The Jerks Shall Enter Heaven Last, Ted.

It’s really sort of fun watching the Monster cut a wide swath through the village, amiright? Ever since St. Ronnie enlisted the Xristians as his useful idiots, they’ve been the storm troopers of the right. Anyway today’s fun is watching … Continue reading

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Ted Cruz, The Pride of Canada, Xristian Xraxies, Y'all Qaeda | 7 Comments

The Afternoon Derp

Oh, FFS: You can turn it off after about 5 seconds, and look for a wall to bang your head against. I guess the good news is that Y’all Qaeda will never be self-aware, and so the Rise of the … Continue reading

Posted in Xristian Xraxies, Y'all Qaeda, You Can't Make This Up | 6 Comments

Your Bottomless Mimosa of Stupid is Served, SC and TN!

We Don’t Serve Your Kind As you may recall, Nikki Haley, the governor of South Carolina (seething hotbed of unbridled lust) is scheduled to give The New Confederacy’s rebuttal to the last State of the Union address given by The … Continue reading

Posted in Homophobia, Theocrats, We Don't Serve Your Kind, Wingnuttia, Xristian Xraxies, Y'all Qaeda | 11 Comments

No Honor Amongst… (One Lump of Stupid or Two, #YallQaeda?)

…militants? Raw Story reports: A heartbroken militiaman announced that one of his buddies had walked off the Oregon nature preserve they had overtaken and had holed up in a local motel to drink away donation money. Another militant, Cai Irvin, … Continue reading

Posted in Get Off The Cross, Y'all Qaeda | 6 Comments

Save the Date! (Some Fries With Your Stupid?)

Our Lady of Bountiful Pasta and Good Shoe Wear Cindy Jacobs, the self-proclaimed prophet of some repute, has not yet released her prophesies for 2016 (but says that she and her fellow prophets have 105 pages to go through, “Heaven … Continue reading

Posted in Cindy Jacobs, snark, Theocrats, Xristian Xraxies | 9 Comments

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Happy Hour News Briefs The Power of Prayer: We actually went outside and started commanding the winds because God had given us authority over the winds — the airways. And we just began to command this storm not to hit … Continue reading

Posted in Xristian Xraxies | 10 Comments

Merry Christmas From Rick Wiles, America!

Bet he gets invited to all the best Christmas parties, huh?

Posted in Rick Wiles, Theocrats, Xristian Xraxies | 1 Comment

He Seems Nice (Part Infinity)

What’s our theocratic man-crush Theodore Shoebat hating-on today? Yoga. Seriously. He wants to invade India and convert the Hindus to be Xristians and wipe-out that heathen voodoo yoga in our lifetimes using SWAT teams. One thinks he must be obsessed … Continue reading

Posted in Theocrats, Theodore Shoebat, Xristian Xraxies | 7 Comments

Your 3-Martini Stupid Is Served, Sen. Cruz

The Horses are Neighing Again The hi-pitched, nasal whine of Sen. Ted Cruz tells us that instead of overturning Roe v. Wade, let’s just give personhood to zygotes! So vagina-owning Americans, be prepared for manslaughter charges if you miscarry for … Continue reading

Posted in 2016 Goat Rodeo, Choice, Ted Cruz, The Pride of Canada, Theocrats, Xristian Xraxies, Y'all Qaeda | 2 Comments