One Lump of Stupid or Two

Jeebus wept

The company you keep strikes Y’all Qaeda AGAIN:

ISIS Bans Teaching Evolution In Schools

The Islamic State group has declared patriotic songs blasphemous and ordered that certain pictures be torn out of textbooks.

…The new Mosul curriculum, allegedly issued by al-Baghdadi himself, stresses that any reference to the republics of Iraq or Syria must be replaced with “Islamic State.” Pictures that violate its ultra-conservative interpretation of Islam will be ripped out of books…

The new curriculum even went so far as to explicitly ban Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution — although it was not previously taught in Iraqi schools.

Well, it takes one theocrat to know another.

Claim Chowder: Darwin Was Wrong Day

Jeebus wept

Hey guys, remember that time that Zipline Ministries and Embarrassing Creation Museum entrepreneur and would-be Kentucky’s (sunken) Ark Adventure grifter Ken Ham told us that today instead of being Darwin Day it should be Darwin Was Wrong Day? (For old time’s sake, altogether now, “Me Neither!”)

Guess what?! He tells us Darwin Was Wrong a Hit

We have already received many positive responses with people sharing the news with others, and as we suspected, we also got a lot of response from secularists. Shortly after we announced Darwin Was Wrong Day, the Internet exploded with responses both positive and negative alike. The secularists particularly took to Twitter—we obviously hit a nerve. But why are they fighting so hard against a God that they don’t even believe exists? Well, because they really do know that God exists, but they are suppressing that truth in unrighteousness (Romans 1:18–19).

But of course, he has climbed on the Cross. Please pass him the nails:

Here is one of my favorite quotes from a secularist’s blog that made me smile: “Once again, as so often before, ol’ Hambo [me] is furious. We imagine that he’s red in the face, foaming at the mouth, and rolling around chewing the carpet.” This is just one of many of the posts that mock me and our position here at AiG. Many of these same secularists respond to just about everything we write/post from Answers in Genesis. I can’t help but think many of these people are so obsessed with Answers in Genesis, and are so convicted and conflicted in their souls, that they seem to live for just trying to publicly speak against anything we print. I imagine many of them sitting at their computer just waiting for our next post to appear so they can have some sort of “purpose” and “meaning” in their lives by then doing their best to suppress the truth (as the book of Romans clearly teaches they do).

Anyway, pretty good for ol’ Hammy to have already declared it a success when he posted his declaration of victory at 9:48:11 AM. We’ll file this one under Claim Chowder and see if there is any evidence to support his crowing.

One Lump of Stupid or Two?

Easter at the Ham's

Easter at the Ham’s

Answers in Genesis’s embarrassing Creation Museum/Zip-line minister and would-be Ark Park entrepreneur (grifter) Ken Ham is agitating to not have February 12 declared Darwin Day (as proposed), but instead to have it declared Darwin Was Wrong Day:

Secularists are becoming increasingly aggressive and intolerant in promoting their anti-God philosophy. Evolutionary ideas provide the foundation for this worldview because they seemingly allow mankind the ability to explain the existence of life and the universe without God. As Christians, we need to be bold in proclaiming the truth of God’s Word to a hurting (groaning, Romans 8:22) world. This year, on February 12, instead of celebrating Darwin’s anti-God religion, we can take this opportunity to show the world that Darwin’s ideas about our supposed evolutionary origins were wrong, and that God’s Word is true, from the very beginning. Let’s make February 12 Darwin Was Wrong Day and point people to the truth of God’s Word.

The subheadings on this longish rant include, No Life from Non-Life, No Mechanism for Evolution, and Evolution Is Bad Science. You know, just incase you wondered if Ham thought it might be good science.

And because the cardinal rule is to fleece the rubes whenever possible (Grifters Gotta Grift), the bottom of his post has links to all the anti-Darwin, anti-Evolution materials to buy, each reasonably priced at $12.99.

The 3-Martini Stupid

“What Judge Moore and these probate judges are doing [by not issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples] is in the finest tradition of Martin Luther King, Jr. They are waging the civil rights battle of this decade, using nonviolent protest to do it”

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Would-be 2016 Goat Rodeo contender Uncle Sugar hisself, Mike Huckabee goes from 0 to Godwin’s Law in under 2 seconds comparing marriage equality to Nazi Germany.

What’s more amazing, though, is that Gomer doesn’t see that in his clyster of an analogy that Xristians are the Nazis, and gay people are the Jews.

Because We Love A GOP Apology

Hey guys, remember that time some Wingnut from West Virginia told us that rape babies are beautiful and that’s why women should carry them to term? (All together now: “Me Neither!”) — Well, Rep. Brian Kurcaba has apologized in the best good mannered way of Y’all Qaeda:

Kurcaba, a Republican from Monongalia, issued a statement Friday apologizing to “anyone who took my comments about the sanctity of human life to mean anything other than that all children are precious regardless of circumstances.”

Take that, sluts.

Claim Chowder, Alabama Style

I guess everyone else is planning their FABULOUS Wedding Receptions?

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Ex-gay Christian blogger Matt Moore has the ultimate proof that Y’all Qaeda really does love the sinner while hating the sin:

Disagree with us if you wish – that’s your prerogative. We’re not going to throw you off a roof for it. But please, stop thinking that we hate you. Step back and look at the world and re-evaluate your definitions of love and hate. What ISIS is doing is what real hatred looks like. We love you, and we want you to know the true God and His Son, Jesus Christ. We will still be your friends if you refuse. We will still love you and serve you and walk through life with you if you keep plugging your ears when we talk about Jesus. Because, at the end of the day, we don’t hate you.

Shorter Matt Moore: Count your blessings! We have not (yet) thrown a ‘mo off of a 7-story building and then stoned him to death. Yet. The End.

The Morning Quote

Error Message

“I don’t see Christ’s redemption limited to human beings,” Providence Presbyterian Church Associate Pastor Dr. Christopher Benek insisted. “If [artificial intelligence] is autonomous, then we should encourage it to participate in Christ’s redemptive purposes in the world.”

Benek was already thinking ahead to a future with what Istvan called “a nation filled with robot pastors and AI spiritual gurus.”

“The Holy Spirit can work though AI; it can work through anything,” he said. “There may be churches set up to deal and promote religious AI in the future. AI can help spread the word of God. In fact, AI might help us understand God better.”

(HT Raw Story)

The 3-Martini Stupid: Who Sank Answers In Genesis’ Ark? UPDATED

Grifters Gotta Grift

Ken Ham, CEO of Answers in Genesis, is bringing a federal religious discrimination lawsuit against the state of Kentucky. It seems that the Commonwealth suddenly discovered that they were being grifted by an Elmer Gantry wannabe of the first order to the tune of $18M and they had enough and rescinded the tax breaks offer.

Answers in Genesis, the group seeking to build a Noah’s Ark theme park in Kentucky, said Tuesday it will file a federal discrimination lawsuit against the state for rejecting its application for tax incentives to help finance the park.

Tourism officials in December denied tax incentives worth roughly $18 million for the Ark Encounter — a biblical theme park to include a 510-foot-long wooden ship — over concerns that it had evolved from a tourist attraction to an effort to advance a religion and that developers planned to discriminate in hiring based on religion.

And boy-howdy, did they ever plan to discriminate:

The overtly religious enterprise, dubbed the “Ark Park,” first sailed into stormy seas in August when AU informed the tourism cabinet that AiG had posted online an opening for a computer-assisted design technician to work at Ark Encounter.

That job post was later removed, but in the August description AiG said applicants must submit a “[c]reation belief statement,” as well as “[c]onfirmation of [their] agreement with the AiG Statement of Faith.” That “statement of faith” required potential AiG employees to affirm their belief that homosexuality is a sin on par with bestiality and incest, that the earth is only 6,000 years old and that the Bible is literally true. Anyone who doesn’t agree with those statements would not be considered for the job.

And while it is perfectly true that religious organizations can hire/fire whomever they want, they cannot discriminate with tax payer money. It’s pretty straightforward. Even Kentucky Governor Beshear, formerly a supporter of Ham’s scam, has thrown in the towel:

Beshear touted the park’s economic benefits as far back as 2010, but various delays have pushed back the park’s estimated opening many times. Answers in Genesis head Ham now says Ark Encounter will open in the spring of 2016, but some remain skeptical. Ham claimed ground has been broken for the Ark Park, but the actual level of progress made remains unknown.

For his part, Beshear supported the tourism cabinet’s decision not to award a massive tax rebate to the Ark Park.

“[I]t has become apparent that they do intend to use religious beliefs as a litmus test for hiring decisions,” the governor said in a December statement.

Interestingly, attention loving Ham, strip mall Ezekiel that he is, is not taking this setback lying down (or wherever it is that he lies). He decided to create a Special Victim’s video:

FYI, Mike Johnson is from the Louisiana-based religious right legal group Freedom Guard; Tony Perkins president of the Family Research Council sits on its board of directors. The Southern Poverty Law Center has designated the FRC as a hate-group, so it seems all the birds are home to roost.

Ham also has put up a billboard in New York City to plead his case, which seems like a silly waste of money from a group claiming that they need money.

“To all our intolerant liberal friends: Thank God you can’t sink this ship,” read AiG’s billboard, which was festooned with a large depiction of the ark. AiG also said it bought a 15-second digital video display that ran in New York City’s Times Square.

And they have already grifted the state for tens of millions of dollars:

The city of Williamstown agreed to a 75 percent break on property taxes for 30 years and a $62 million bond issue. The Grant County Industrial Development Authority gave the park $200,000 plus 100 acres of land at a reduced price. The state has promised $11 million in road improvements for the park’s benefit.

The state also agreed to provide $18 million in tourism tax credits, but withdrew the offer after it became clear that Ark Encounter jobs would go only to people who pass the group’s religious litmus test. You would think state officials could have seen that coming.

Here’s the deal: if they want to build a theme park to grift the rubes and god-botherers, they should go to town and raise the money themselves. The fact that they cannot raise a relatively small amount (after grifting millions of public dollars) sort of shows us that there is no public demand for this venue and that indeed it was always planned to be a ministry of some sort, and not a job-creating engine. Or, to put it more succinctly as the Lexington Herald-Leader did, Why does God need so much tax-payer help?

(Courier Journal, Lexington Herald-Leader, Americans United)

UPDATE: A day later and Charlie Pierce is now writing about Ham and the Ark. Sigh. And one of his commenters is using the Elmer Gantry line, too/also.