One Lump of Stupid or Two, Wingnuttia?

A Patriot At The White House

A Patriot At The White House

Hey guys, remember the other day after a white supremacist killed nine black people in Charleston South Carolina’s historic Emanuel AME Church and pretty much the entire nation told The Confederacy to get over it after 150 years and take down the flag of traitors, seditionists, and well, sore losers? Remember when Y’all Qaeda replied to us, N’uh-uh, and not one single manly-man in the 2016 Goat Rodeo said a word in favor of removing the flag?

Even 2012 Goat Rodeo flip-flopping impresario Willard Romney had enough of a spine to tweet out:

Guess what? It took a woman to say the obvious to the oblivious! Said SC Gov. Nikki Haley,

“Today, we are here in a moment of unity in our state, without ill will, to say it is time to move the flag from the Capitol grounds,” Haley said. “One hundred fifty years after the end of the Civil War … the time has come.”

Things are a little slow in the South.

And speaking of being a little slow, Senatorette Lindsey Graham is suddenly right by Haley’s side after a weekend of humiliating kicks to his crotch for saying that flying the flag of traitors, seditionists, and losers worked for South Carolina:

“Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.), a candidate for president who just last week defended his home state’s use of the Confederate flag, also will call for it to be removed, according to a source familiar with his decision.”

Which means that if ¡Jeb! as the likely winner of the conservative primary now has three choices for a split-gender ticket, with Haley, and Fiorina! And speaking of The Smartest Bush®, ¡Jeb! told the book of faces that:

“My position on how to address the Confederate flag is clear. In Florida, we acted, moving the flag from the state grounds to a museum where it belonged.”

…where Marco ‘Big Gulp’ Rubio, the Cold Warrior for a New Generation, and beloved grandson figure of Wingnuts over the age of 65 and under the age of death, tried to pass legislation to keep it flying.

Just as a side note: for those who claim that the flag of traitors and losers is part of their heritage, it didn’t start flying over South Carolina’s capitol until 1961:

“The Battle Flag of the Northern Virginia Army, made famous by Robert Lee but never formerly adopted as the national flag of the confederacy, was first placed above South Carolina’s State Capitol’s Dome in 1961. It arrived, like many other appropriations of the controversial symbol, in response to the civil rights and desegregation movements.”

That’s something to be proud of?

The Rhett or Ashleigh Chronicles, Cont.

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman. Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman.
Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

In light of the comments yesterday of Senatorette Lindsey Graham defending the flag of traitors and sedition as in relationship to the racially-motivated Charleston Massacre, we recall:

“The demographics race we’re losing badly,” said Sen. Lindsey O. Graham (S.C.). “We’re not generating enough angry white guys to stay in business for the long term.”

It seems Lindsey got his wish.

The 3-Martini Stupid is Served

A Patriot At The White House

A Patriot At The White House

What is it with these crackers that they don’t understand that the Confederate Flag is divisive, offensive, and un-American?

“Well, at the end of the day it’s time for people in South Carolina to revisit that decision. [That] would be fine with me, but this is part of who we are,” Graham said on CNN when asked if the flag should stop flying at the Statehouse…

“… Graham, who canceled campaign events to return to South Carolina following the shooting, suggested that racial issues in his state and other areas are not the result of symbolic items “but what’s in people’s heart.”

To misquote Scissorhead Oregon Beer Snob, what’s in the hearts of nine people in Charleston are bullets.

“In the interview on CNN, Graham called for a “balanced” approach to the issue of the flag, noting that near the Civil War memorial honoring fallen Confederate soldiers is another one honoring African-Americans.

“It works here, that’s what the Statehouse agreed to do. You could probably visit other places in the country near some symbol that doesn’t quite strike you right.”

All kidding aside, Lindsey Graham is running for President of the United States of America and he says that the flag of rebels and traitors works here? I think he’s unfit for office on that remark alone.

The Afternoon Quote

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman. Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman.
Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

I’ve been joking with Lindsey. Did you see that? He’s going to have a rotating first lady. He’s a bro with no ho.”

-Sen. Mark Kirk, speaking about Senatorette Huckleberry Closetcase.

Quote of the Day

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman. Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman.
Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

‘I’ve got a lot of friends. We’ll have a rotating first lady’

–Lindsey Graham

I’m betting they would be spinning.

The Morning Quote

Rhett or Ashleigh?

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman. Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman.
Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

“If Caitlyn Jenner wants to be safe and have a prosperous economy, vote for me. I’m into addition.”

Lindsey Graham

“Annie Leibovitz never did boudoir shots of me,” he didn’t add.

Saddle-Up Another Goat!

Lindsey-Graham-Announces

Huckleberry Closetcase is in it to win it, and Tiger Beat on the Potomac (thanks Charlie!) gives him the star turn he so craves:

“It’s the tale of a son of pool-hall owners, who grew up near-impoverished in the back room of his parents’ bar. As a college student, he raised, and eventually adopted, his little sister after their parents died, before going on to have a career as an Air Force lawyer and then rising to become South Carolina’s senior senator.”

I’ll bet he was in the back room of a pool hall, plucky gal that he is.

(Also/Too: Thank you Jeebus for this gift we are about to receive.)

Important 2016 Goat Rodeo Update!

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman. Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman.
Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

“Sen. Lindsey O. Graham (R-S.C.), who in recent months has moved closer to running for president, announced Monday on CBS “This Morning” that he will announce if he will make a White House bid on June 1 from South Carolina. Graham formed an exploratory committee, Security Through Strength, in January and has been staffing it as he prepares for what looks increasingly like it will become a full-fledged run for president. Graham told South Carolina state lawmakers last week that he’s “99.9 percent sure” he’s going to run. If Graham runs, he is likely to center his campaign around the theme of national security. He is among the most hawkish figures in the Republican Party and already has secured the support of Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.), a close friend and fellow hawk.” (WaPo)

Senatorette Huckleberry Closetcase is gonna run, thank you Jeebus for this blessing! We need to get a side-saddle for the goat.

Saddle-Up Another Goat!

graham-howdy-doodyThank you Jeebus for this gift from Tiger Beat on the Potomac:

Lindsey Graham looking at June 1 to announce White House run, sources say

“To our enemies: Get ready, because there’s a new way of doing business coming,” Graham said last Friday at a state GOP Silver Elephant dinner. “To our friends: Get ready for the America that you used to know. To Iowa and New Hampshire: Hello. To South Carolina, you have my heart.”

“And to Rhett and Ashleigh,” Huckleberry did not say, “mount me.”

Some Fries With Your Stupid, Lindsey Graham?

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman. Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

Scarlett: Sir, you are no gentleman.
Rhett Butler: And you, Miss, are no lady.

“Al Qaeda, Al Nusra, Al Qaeda in the Arab Peninsula… Everything that starts with ‘Al’ in the Middle East is bad news.”

–Arabic Scholar Huckleberry Closetcase

Oh, and al? Al is the Arabic word for the, so I guess the Senatorette doesn’t like articles?