Today in History


The Los Angeles Country Board of Supervisors votes to lobby Congress to rename the Angeles National Forest the “Reagan National Forest.” Says Sierra Club spokesman Bob Hattoy, “Naming a national forest after Ronald Reagan is like naming a day care center after W.C. Fields.”


A White House official admits that Saint Ronnie has never discussed AIDS with Surgeon General C. Everett Koop and has yet to read Koop’s 6-month old report, which predicted 180,000 deaths from the disease by 1991.

Does the deluxe Reagan package…

…come with the sound of the 2 and-one-half month pregnant Nancy barfing? Because that’s about the only way you could get me to stay in Riverside and pay $1,000 for it.

As the nation remembers the 100th anniversary of Ronald Reagan’s birth (Feb. 6), all sorts of events are taking place, all sorts of merchandise can be purchased and lots of folks will try to get as close to the memory of the nation’s 40th president as possible.

So try this one on for size: How about sleeping in the same bed as the Gipper did?

Ronald and Nancy Reagan spent part of their 1952 honeymoon at the Mission Inn in Riverside, Calif. To mark the occasion, the resort is now offering “The Reagan Honeymoon Package.”

Among other amenities, the $1,199 getaway includes “Deluxe Accommodations for Two in the Alhambra Suite” where the Reagans stayed the first night of their marriage.

You’ll also get dinner, massages, passes to the Reagan Library — and the opportunity to boast that you had a romantic evening where the Reagans once did.

(The Click)

The Feast of Saint Ronnie


One hundred years ago today, Sweet Baby Jeebus appeared to President Howard Taft and said to him, Pull my finger. Out pooped little Ronnie Reagan, and the rest was history.

Today we gather to honor the memory, the legacy, the lunacy of Saint Ronnie, on the occasion of his 100th birthday. Throughout the day, I will update this post with links to your fond remembrances of the old cabbage. Send links to your posts on your blogs to: tengrain AT mockpaperscissors DOT com. I will post them here:

Come back and check often.

Please feel free to leave lengthy, pointless comments (as Ronnie would).



Neville Carebear

President Carebear, that mythical Hopey-Changey man has now fully endorsed trickle-down economics and GOP policies.

As many others have noted, he does not have the courage of his convictions, or the spine, to put up a fight. Personally, I think it is much more likely that as a Rockefeller Republican, he is OK with the policy generally.

What little progress we’ve made in the past two years should be credited to Nancy Pelosi who did the real work getting bills through The House where they then went to die in the tender embrace of Harry Reid. The President, of course, was playing 7-Dimensional Chess and could not be bothered to help.

So how did we reward Nancy for carrying so much water for Harry and The Bear? We overwhelming elected the GOP, removed her from being the Speaker of the House, and in her place we installed a known drunk, a mental midget, and absolutely corrupt politician noted for handing out cheques from Big Tobacco on the Floor of the House, the perpetually tanned John Boehner, AKA, Weepy.

It’s really hard for me to work up too much of a sweat overall. The Millionaires and their ilk already were paying almost no taxes, so this Neville Chamberlain appeasement on taxes means little in reality, truth be told. But symbolically it means the world.

Welcome to the 8th term of Ronald Reagan.

And so it goes.

I like CGI Reagan better than the real one…

…at least I think this one doesn’t have access to The Codes.

Remember those creepy claymation Christmas Specials, like the one with the Island of Broken Toys? Brrrrrrr, me neither!

Anyway, welcome to the new GOP-world of CGI-Reagan (minty fresh!), where you can watch the resurrected Saint Gipper (Zombie?) do battle with President Carebear. We’re not sure what this is, but we liked the Road Runner better. We think he might be smarter that the Gipper, too.

Now you too can have Saint Ronnie as your server!

The adopted son of Jane Wyman, the failed hate-radio personality Michael Reagan, is selling email addresses bearing the imprint of Saint Ronnie:

Conservative talk radio host Michael Reagan, eldest son of former president Ronald Reagan, is selling e-mail addresses on his website with an appeal to conservatives to stop giving their money to companies he casts as tied to liberalism.

So for a lowly $35 per year, you can proudly have your email address be

I’m thinking about going for, or maybe What addresses are you interested in?


Pop Quiz!

February 6 is Ronald Reagan Day – For three bonus points counting towards 1.37% of your final grade, tell us in the comments how you plan to celebrate. Time’s up, #2 pencil’s down, close your blue books.

Feel the Love Tour Continues!

Some of you wonder (I know it!) why I continue to pick on crazy old cat-lady, Phyllis Schlafly. I think you now get it. Between the blacks (not said with irony, either) and unwed women kicking their husbands out (what?) and welfare sponges, Crazy Phyllis is not taking the back seat to any old Teabagger.

(Full disclosure: in the Reagan-era ’80s, Schlafly showed up at my mother’s house to address the DAR meeting she was hosting. My sister, Eightgrain, stood up in the middle of the speech, flipped off Schlafly and walked out of the meeting, along with the younger half of the chapter, never to attend again. This story always stayed with me.)

(Michigan Liberal via Watertiger)

Is it too late to bid on Saint Ronnie?

NEW YORK – After sitting stuffed and mounted for more than 40 years in a museum, Roy Rogers’ horse Trigger and dog Bullet will be TV stars once more.

Rural cable network RFD-TV bought Bullet for $35,000 on Thursday and Trigger for $266,000 a day earlier at an auction in New York City.

RFD-TV owner Patrick Gottsch said the Omaha, Neb.-based network will begin airing old Roy Rogers movies on Saturdays starting November 6. The movie cowboy’s son, Roy Jr., will introduce each film, as Trigger and Bullet stand in the background.

I mean, wasn’t he stuffed and then mounted by every GOPer in the known universe?