Frank Luntz Speaks!


I hate to break the news to you, Frankie, but Democrats are Americans, too.

Simple Solutions From Simple-Minded Erick Erickson

Erick the Red Shirt

Erick the Red Shirt

Noted civil engineer and our blog’s old pal Erick Erickson has a suggestion for California’s drought: build more reservoirs:

“Now it appears California is in for a massive, continual rain storm and the Northeast is going to be pretty dry… Now, reading that and knowing just how dry California has been, I would think sane people would start building some new reservoirs to collect all the rain they are going to get… Given what is coming to California, it would be worth the state’s time to build new reservoirs. But the state will instead continue to impose ever more demanding conservation measures and will turn to extremely expensive reverse osmosis systems that make ocean water drinkable. Reservoirs are a common sense solution, which means they will not happen in California.”

Which sounds like sage advice coming from someone who doesn’t live on the west coast or understand the water situation here. From Seattle to San Diego, the water supply in the west depends upon snow pack. As the snow melts over the year, it (usually) supplies a steady stream of water, a water bank if you will that lasts all year. The issue is that with climate change’ warm wet winters, there is no snowpack.

It’s another of E-Squared’s dishonest attempts to blame environmentally friendly California for the draught and subsequent water rationing. The thing that makes it dishonest instead of just stupid is that you cannot just build reservoirs without all the rest of the infrastructure to go with it to move the water to the reservoir and then from the reservoir where it is needed. These are massive, expensive projects. It is not just an open pit that the rain falls into.

And even if California were to move ahead with Ewick’s plan, he would be opposed to the expense, and imagine the shrieking if eminent domain were used to secure land to locate these reservoirs.

Your Three Martini Stupid Is Served, Glenn Beck

Protesting against Indiana’s We Dont Serve Your Kind law logically concludes at concentration camps, or at least so says free-range conspiracy theorist Glenn Beck:

An Now, An Update From History’s Greatest Reporter® Bill O’Reilly


It keeps happening to History’s Greatest Reporter® Bill O’Reilly:

I was in a situation one time, in a war zone in Argentina, in the Falklands, where my photographer got run down and then hit his head and was bleeding from the ear on the concrete. And the army was chasing us. I had to make a decision. And I dragged him off, you know, but at the same time, I’m looking around and trying to do my job, but I figure I had to get this guy out of there because that was more important.

Bill is a hero! Just doing his job, reporting the news and saving people left and right!

“The record is clear, and O’Reilly’s own report for CBS News confirms this: Argentine soldiers did not massacre civilians during this protest. And now the cameraman who shot the video that O’Reilly filed from this demonstration says another part of the Fox host’s account is untrue: O’Reilly never came to his aid, nor was he in need of rescue.”

“I put my trusty Bowie knife between my teeth,” Bill-O didn’t say, “and I swam through shark infested waters, fighting off killer whales on either side of me, to reach the Falkland Islands setting a new world-record for open sea long-distance swimming, a personal best for me. Then, into the war zone, and the rest, as they say, is history.”

Your Saturday Bottomless Mug of Stupid: Sippy Cupp Edition

Looks like the Mayo read S.E. Cupp's column today.

Looks like the Mayo read S.E. Cupp’s column today.

I really thought I was being trolled:

Tribune Content Agency is proud to add columnist, author and broadcast commentator S.E. Cupp to our roster of Premium Content creators. We invite you to try Cupp’s new syndicated weekly column for a free 60-day trial via Tribune News Service.

Proud of that, are they? It’s a big world.

S.E. Cupp provides a fresh and nuanced conservative viewpoint tackling topics across the spectrum and engaging audiences with stylish writing and clear thinking.

Clear Thinking?

“S.E. Cupp always adds a lively voice to the political discussion,” said John Barron, editor and general manager at Tribune Content Agency. “When taking on complex and controversial topics, she will always leave a reader with new knowledge, new perspectives and maybe even a change of mind.”

And as an example of Cupp’s lively voice taking on a controversial topic, here she is at TownHall exhorting Conservatives, Get Serious in which she spends an entire column persuading conservatives to not take seriously novelty 2016 Goat Rodeo candidate Ben Carson, without seemingly understanding that no one takes Carson seriously, least of all the Confederacy.

And as if on cue…

Pop Quiz!

Richard  Cohen, World's Worst Writer

Richard Cohen, World’s Worst Writer

As we mentioned earlier, Richard Cohen The Worst Writer In The World® wrote another one of his gruesome abecedarian works. What I failed to notice is that he gave a gift to bloggers at the end:

“Now for a blogger alert: Please note that I do not think racism is no longer a problem or that campus rape has not been an unaddressed horror. I know better.”

For one-half of one point counting towards your midterm essay, write a Blogger Alert for any columnist of your choice, which disclaims their usual craptastic writing and asks you not to mock them.

In the comments. #2 Pencils only.

Here’s my example:

  • Peggy Noonan:
  • — Blogger Alert: “Please not that I wrote this column on the way to St. Ronnie’s Library, while riding topless with the Hell’s Angels, high on ether and cheap rum…”

Have fun!

Some Fries With Your Stupid, Andrea Tantaros?

Get Off The Cross, We Need The Wood

Snow days are conspiring with Libtards to strip Xristians of holy days.

Jeebus, some people.

Shorter Cardinal Douthat


“If only the hippies had not discovered sex, there would be no poor people.”

That idea makes some people on the left angry. As they see it, it’s money and only money that Murray’s Fishtown and Putnam’s hometown lack and need. And it’s unchecked capitalism and Republican stinginess, not the sexual revolution, that has devastated working-class society over the last few decades. Fight poverty, redistribute wealth, and you’ll revive family and community — it’s as simple as that.

So here’s the moral of the lesson (see what I did there?): have sex-phobic, professional scold Ross Douthat sign your permission slips before you get your freak on.

You Cannot Make This Up


Over at Wingnuttia’s Free Bacon…

I Don’t Love Spock
Column: President Obama’s favorite Star Trek character is an appeasing arrogant jerk

Matthew Continetti really dislikes Star Trek’s Mr. Spock because the character reminds him of the Kenyan Usurper. The good news is that he likes Commander Data. You know, the robot/android who—like Pinocchio—wants to become a little human boy.

That’s wearing your heart on your sleeve, Continetti.

Insightful Analysis From Our Lady of Merlot

I didn't know she smoked.

I didn’t know she smoked.

Seriously, Our Lady of Merlot, Ann Althouse wrote this stunning and insightful analysis of the on-going Brian Williams kerfuffle at NBC:

  1. Williams should be fired. A voluntary (or coerced) hiatus is too piddling to matter.
  2. I never watch any nightly new shows. It’s like a corruption scandal in a sport I don’t watch.

As you know, I have made a policy of not linking to the Monkey Cage ever since the time her drunken commenter/stalker/husband, the appropriately named Mead showed up here, but it’s easy enough to find: just look for the wine stain on the internet.