Bristolnacht, Cont. The UnBristling #PalinBrawl

bristol-the-nun

Alaskastan’s part-time governor and full-time grifter Sarah Palin’s daughter Brisket® decides, in print, to tell her side of what happened at Bristolnacht:

First, the media said Trig was not really my mom’s kid.

Then, they claimed my mom said “I can see Russia from my house.”

Recently, they said my parents are giving a divorce.

And now, they’re saying my family started a “drunken brawl.”

Thanks for the reminders. Say, your mom promised at one point to produce Trigg’s birth certificate… oh well. SNL is not the media. Your mother was the one who hinted a divorce was coming. There is a Police report (a legal document that can be introduced as evidence in a court of law) that indicates YOU started a drunken brawl.

Our friend got knocked out from a cheap shot from behind. (His injury resulted in ten stitches, so it was really low.)

Why would anyone do this? Well, here’s a hint. The guy was on social media during this incident, tweeting, “about to get famous.”

When Willow saw all this happening she looked at the guy’s mom and said “get ahold of your son.”

But apparently the apple didn’t fall too far from the tree, because his mom pushed Willow. A grown woman pushed my little sister.

By this point, I’d already gotten into the car. But when Willow ran to me crying, telling me that some lady had pushed her down, I got out of the car to go talk to her. Any big sister would do this.

It drones on and on, play-by-play.

All of this comes a day after the audio was released from the police interview with a very drunken Bristol, so the timing is both serendipitous and perhaps damning, too. Methinks given the love that the Palins engender means that those alleged and rumored cell phone videos and audio recording are gonna come like a wave.

McCain-celebration

And once again, we need to thank Grandpa Walnuts for bringing this family of grifters and waterheads to our attention, and potentially one very old heartbeat away from the nuclear codes.

Bristolnacht, Cont. #PalinBrawl

bristol-the-naughty-nun

Our pal and Scissorhead M. Bouffant over at The Web Of Evil has the soundtrack of the interview with a drunken Brisket® Palin taken during the melée in Alaskastan.

NSFW Audio, so call around your co-workers and boss as she freely uses s***, f***, c***, and that’s just to describe herself.

Raw Story has a bit of the background including that the host was the one to call the cops, and that he considered pressing charges.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Weird Dave)

#PalinBrawl The Hummer For The Bummer

Hillbilly Hummer

Could this be the stretch Hummer for Alaska’s part-time governor and full-time grifter Sarah Palin and her clan of fighting future reality show hosts?

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Jo6Pak and @SeattleLib65 on the electronic Twitter machine)

Word Salad, Tossed Fresh Daily

back-of-palin-hand

“To claim last night, also, our president saying ISIS is not Islamic, um, ISIS says they’re Islamic,” Palin continued. “They are so full of deception that America should be concerned with the policies that are going on. And, as I watched the speech last night, Sean, the thought going through my mind is ‘I owe America a global apology. Because John McCain, through all of this, John McCain should be our president.’ He had the advice, today, still giving it to Barack Obama, and he will not listen to it, about the residual forces that must be left behind in order to secure the peace in Iraq that we had fought so hard for.”

–Famous party-crasher Mooselini to Sean Hannity, and Blog only knows what she was trying to say. (Raw Story)

From the Double-Wide Gazette

Palin Clan Reportedly Involved In Epic ‘Dog Pile’ Fistfight At Snowmobile Party

There is just no limit to the thanks I give to Grandpa Walnuts for bringing The Narcisist Borealis to our national attention, and literally suggesting that this nitwit was the right person to have one heart beat away from the nuclear codes…

McCain-celebration

Word Salad, Tossed Fresh Daily

A dead-eyed dick

A dead-eyed dick

Alaska’s part-time governor and full-time grifter Sarah Palin must have spent some time at Annapolis as one of her five of so colleges from which she did not earn her degree, and she takes to the awesome power of her MyFacePlace page to offer her sound, professional, and winning advice to Commander-in-Chief (and Kenyan Usurper) Barack HUSSEIN O’Bummer on how to defeat ISIS (emphasis mine):

War is hell. So go big or go home, Mr. President. Big means bold, confident, wise assurance from a trustworthy Commander-in-Chief that it shall all be worth it. Charge in, strike hard, get out. Win.

Being Mooselini, she whines her usual grievances and then having lost track of her thesis (“Charge in, strike hard, get out”), contradicts herself (emphasis mine):

The rise of the animalistic terror group, ISIS, is the result of Obama’s lead-from-behind foreign policy. He had broadcast his war strategy for all the enemy to see in Iraq, so the enemy could wait us out and strike as soon as America turned tail and turned away from all we’d sacrificed there. Terrorists who we had under control got to regroup and grow after Obama’s premature pull out.

War is hell, Generalissimo Mooselini. But your writing seems to be hellish.