The High-Cost of The Low Road

Jeebus weeps

Jeebus weeps

Hey guys, you know all of those unsuccessful challenges of Y’all Qaeda to try to keep the ‘mos unwed and in the closet? Someone’s gotta pay the lawyers!

(WXYZ) – The six lawyers who worked on the case against Michigan’s ban on same-sex marriage are asking for nearly $2 million from the state to cover some of their fees.

In all, the six attorneys – Carole Stanyar, Dana Nessel, Kenneth Mogill, Robert Sedler, Mary Bonauto and Vickie Henry – said the total calculation came to $1,927,450 for their fees. Every attorney charged $350 an hour, with three of them putting in over 1,000 hours of work each in the case.

Guess who’s gonna hafta pay?

DETROIT (AP) — Lawyers who won a historic legal battle to strike down Michigan’s ban on gay marriage are seeking nearly $2 million from the state.

Under federal law, there seems to be no dispute that lawyers for April DeBoer and Jayne Rowse are entitled to payment from taxpayers. Attorney General Bill Schuette vigorously opposed their challenge to Michigan’s 2004 ban on gay marriage, which was declared unconstitutional by the U.S. Supreme Court.

Nice work, fiscally-responsible conservatives, you know, letting the Xristian Xrazies burn state tax money.

Some Fries With Your Stupid?

He really tells Obama to listen to his follow Africans.

News That Will Drive You To Drink

The right to life ends at birth

The right to life ends at birth

Shorter Townhall: Gay Marriage = More Abortions

My geometry teach told me that a straight line was the shortest distance between two points. Maybe Ryan Anderson skipped class that day? Anyway, his very wordy proof is anything but linear.

Supply and demand relationship -> demand for abortions = breakdown in families -> Breakdown of families = marriage equality -> therefore marriage equality = increased demand for abortions.

QED, Bitchez!

One Lump of Stupid or Two, Congress?

We Don’t Serve Your Kind

Jeebus weeps

Blessed are the Bigots, for they shall never wear out their grim smile muscles.

Hey guys, remember dumb as a post Mike Pence’s brief, disastrous flirtation with Y’all Qaeda’s We Don’t Serve Your Kind legislation that resulted in cancelled conventions, loss of business expansion, etc., valued in the range of hundreds of millions of dollars?

The Republicans in Congress are looking to pass a similar law. “Leave no bad idea behind,” is the motto these days.

“Following the U.S. Supreme Court ruling in favor of same-sex marriage, Republicans in Congress who oppose gay nuptials are pushing for a religious freedom bill seen to enable anti-LGBT discrimination, but for the time being congressional leaders have no plans to move forward with the measure. The legislation, known as the First Amendment Defense Act, has the stated purpose of prohibiting the federal government from taking adverse action against individuals — defined broadly in the bill to include for-profit businesses — if they oppose same-sex marriage.”

Representatives Mike Lee and Paul Labrador had the bright idea:

“Individual Americans, of course, may differ in their views about the definition of marriage; they may differ in their views about how this decision should have been reached,” Lee is quoted as saying in the Washington Post at the news conference. “But I do think Americans are overwhelmingly united in their belief that religious freedom needs to be protected and that neither a person nor any group of people ought to be subject to government retaliation against based on their religious beliefs…That’s why we’re pushing this bill.”

The bill would:

  • allow a company to continue to contract with the federal government if it engages in discriminatory practices and cites opposition to same-sex marriage as the reason
  • gut Obama’s memorandum requiring hospitals receiving Medicare and Medicaid to grant visitation rights for same-sex couples
  • permit a federal employee to refuse to process tax returns, visa applications or Social Security if a same-sex couple’s paperwork appears on his or her desk

So tell me where in the Bible it says that being needlessly cruel is a good thing.

It’s Very Profitable To Lose

Get Off The Cross Someone Needs The Wood

Thank you Jeebus!

Thank you Jeebus!

Hey guys, remember the Oregon bakers who refused to bake a cake for a same sex couple because (as everyone knows) bakers are actually priestly participants somehow, too, during the ceremony or something? Remember how they were fined $135,000 (most of which was actually punitive for releasing their non-customers address and contact info to the mouth-breathing Xristians who then stalked and made death threats to their kids in the most Xristian way possible) and also told that they cannot violate public accommodation laws by posting any sort of We Don’t Serve Your Kind signs in the window?

You know, Sweet Cakes By Melissa, Aaron and Melissa Klein. Them. Those guys?

They’ve raised $352,000 in their second funding campaign, in addition to $109,000 in the first one (before GoFundMe banned them)!

Blessed are The Grifters, for they shall have rubes forever.

News That Will Drive You To Drink (In a Good Way)

liza-minnelli-gay-marriageThat didn’t take long—

Commission to rescind order for lowering flag

Folded like a cheap suit. It’s a great read, and all it took was a petition with 1,000 local signers in a county of 15,000. Democracy in Action.

Missouri Can’t Get It Up

Everyone is a Teabagger

Everyone is a Teabagger

Sweet Baby Jeebus on a pogo stick, these people from Possum Hollar make being petty a competitive sport:

Missouri county to fly flags at half-mast to mourn Supreme Court’s ‘despicable’ marriage ruling

The three county commissioners decided that the tyrants in the black robes (not the white robes that they prefer in Dent County, Missouri) who let the ‘mos git hitched have caused a national tragedy:

“All flags at the Dent County Courthouse and the Judicial Building will be lowered on the 26th of each month for one year in remembrance of the Supreme Court’s ruling, handed down on June 26th of this year.”

This presumes, of course, that they will remember to do it, and/or know how to work a calendar. Knowing how to work a rope, that I think they got down pat.

The Afternoon Quote

Get Off The Cross, Someone Needs The Wood

Jeebus in his younger, happier days.

Jeebus in his younger, happier days.

Once again Barbwire, the blog-like thingie of Matt Barber, the man who only thinks about hot, sweaty, man-on-man sex with thighs like pistons that can pump all night, brings us our afternoon jolly:

“The persecution of Christians in the United States will now begin in earnest, as we have not seen thus far in our nation. While many associate murder with persecution, we’re not quite there—yet (but, give it time)…”

…And the Oscar for Biggest Drama Queen goes to…

“Persecution does not necessarily involve outright killing. In addition to slander, defamation, intimidation and other personal attacks, it can mean “legal” assaults on people that cause them to lose their jobs, their money, their private property, their businesses and their freedom.”

So true. LGBTQ people have been persecuted for decades in all of these areas, forced from their homes and communities, fired, and shunned just for being not straight. Maybe liberals and Xristian Xrazies can find some common ground after all?

“These things have already been happening in cases across the nation, from bakers and photographers to bed and breakfast owners to company CEOs.”

Or maybe not.

Some Fries With Your Stupid

I cannot imagine anyone bragging that she got Chimpy McStagger elected, but Janet Porter isn’t just anyone. She’s a special snowflake.

Anyway Porter says that because her prayers worked for Chimpy, they will work for repealing Marriage Equality:

Call that number! Operators are waiting!

Kansas: ‘We Don’t Serve Your Kind’ Executive Order

Jeebus weeps

Jeebus weeps

And so Kansas’ most famous strip-mall Ezekiel Sam Brownback (with his teased/bullied Baptist hair) has issued his much-threatened executive order, in the key of dog whistle, to keep discrimination legal and to protect the Xristian Xrazies against the Lavender Menace who just wanna get hitched.

“Brownback said the order protects “Kansas clergy and religious organizations from being forced to participate in activities that violate their sincerely and deeply held beliefs.”

“The order explicitly protects religious organizations that provide “social services or charitable services,” meaning that it extends beyond the wedding ceremony.

So it really can be interpreted to be a “We Don’t Serve Your Kind” law?

“The order means “a homeless shelter that received a state contract or grant could refuse family housing to a gay couple with a child, or a foster care agency could refuse to place a child in their custody with the child’s family member just because the family member was in a same-sex relationship – and the state could not require them to treat all families equally,” said Micah Kubic, executive director of the Kansas chapter of the ACLU.”

I was tempted to snarkily call this Brownback Vs. The Board Of Education, but it has nothing to do with the that landmark case except that this is the same kind of roadblock that The Confederacy was throwing during the push to desegregate the schools. Still, there is a dim echo.

Interesting note: Brownback issued his fatwah executive order the same day that Kansas LGBTQ public servants gained access to full benefits for their same-sex spouses. I don’t think that was serendipity.

(Wichita Eagle)