Keith Ablow To The Rescue, Dr. Carson!

intelligent-design.jpgI guess these doctor types gotta stick together, so Fox News resident psychological consultant (who may or may not be certified (!) and licensed to practice), Keith Ablow is defending 2016 Goat Rodeo novelty candidate Dr. Ben ‘Hogan’s Heroes’ Carson for suggesting that the Jews gave up without a fight to the Holocaust, because guns.

Which is a pretty bold move when you consider that the Fox News audience doesn’t believe the Holocaust happened.

Cause of Natural Death: Gunfire

Shame Them, Shame All of Them

“Sorry your kid died today,” Kelly Ayotte didn’t say, “but the NRA gave me $500, so no gun control laws.”

Lookit, I’m too old and cynical to think that today’s slaughter will change anything. After a classroom full of children were mowed down in Sandyhook, we lost our souls. All we have left is to shame the bastards that they are doing nothing to make it stop.

Kelly Ayotte? low hanging fruit. She accepted $500 from the NRA last cycle, the cheapest whore in the Senate. She needs to be reminded every day of her life that she sold her soul for pocket change. All of them need to be reminded constantly that the policy of the United States is that anyone can slaughter anyone else by gunfire.

So another week, another mass killing, and the politicians still have no plans to address this. This is the exceptional, Gawd-blessed, United States where death by gunfire should now be listed as a natural cause. It is the policy of the United States to let this happen.

News That Will Drive You To Drink

Ah'm as popular as a fart in church back home!

Ah’m as popular as a fart in church back home!

Hey guys, remember earlier today when we cited Betteridge’s Law of Headlines, because the National Review asked if it was time for boy exorcist and noted volcano scholar Bobby Jindal to catch fire, and Scissorhead Kandance said that Jindal “couldn’t catch fire if he jumped in a swimming pool of gas with a lit match”?

Guess what?!

Jindal tried to jump into a pool of gasoline with a lit match:

“These acts of evil are a direct result of cultural rot, and it is cultural rot that we have brought upon ourselves, and then we act like we are confounded and perplexed by what is happening here,” Jindal said.

Jindal rattled off a litany of root causes, including the glorification of “sick and senseless acts of violence in virtually every element of our pop culture” — something he said had been going on for at least a generation.

He blamed violence in movies, TV shows, music and video games.

“Rape, torture, murder, mass murder, all are cinematic achievements,” Jindal said.
“Our music does the same thing, we promote evil, we promote the degradation of women, we flaunt the laws of God and common decency and we promote it all and we flood our young people with it.”

He said legal abortion and treatment of the elderly showed that “we have no regard for the sanctity of human life in any regard.”

But mostly, he blamed single mothers and absentee fathers.

“Let’s get really politically incorrect here and talk specifically about this horror in Oregon,” Jindal said. “This killer’s father is now lecturing us on the need for gun control and he says he has no idea how or where his son got the guns.”

Jindal continued his personal attack on the killer’s father.

“Of course he doesn’t know,” Jindal said. “You know why he doesn’t know? Because he is not, and has never been in his son’s life. He’s a complete failure as a father, he should be embarrassed to even show his face in public. He’s the problem here.”

“He brags that he has never held a gun in his life and that he had no idea that his son had any guns,” Jindal continued. “Why didn’t he know? Because he failed to raise his son. He should be ashamed of himself, and he owes us all an apology.”

Poof! some smoke, but no fire.

Buh-bye, Bobby. It wasn’t nice knowing you.

Some Fries With Your Stupid, Dr. Carson?

guns at birth

The people who want to get rid of our gun rights, I want them to tell me how exactly that stops these kinds of incidents from happening. Because the people who are going to commit these crimes, they don’t care about your silly rules, they’re not going to pay attention to them. So all you’re going to do is create more vulnerability, as Thomas Jefferson said. He said the people who are going to be disadvantaged are the ones who are law-abiding.

Ben ‘Copernicus’ Carson

Um, Jefferson never said it. He quoted it, and then in the margin wrote, “False idee di utilità.”.

The Quotable Huckabee

Mike (Gomer) and Jetherine (the Gomerette) Huckabee

Mike (Gomer) and Jetherine (the Gomerette) Huckabee

“We have not so much a gun problem, we have a problem with sin and evil.”

That’s quite an agenda you’re running on, Gomer. Now take your words and put them into action…

Josh Duggar

Your Bottomless Mimosa of Stupid is Served, Petunia

Petunia and Pals weekend B-Team (and that ought to scare you), led by hebephrenic TeeVee Dinner heir and vanity press owner Tucker Carlson tells us that, yeah, Australia has no gun violence because they have no freeeeeeeeedumb!

And then for good measure ads that Australians can go to jail for “expressing unpopular opinions,” which seems to be some sort of jab at Australia’s Hate Speech laws, which by the way, are working really well, too.

What Could Possibly Go Wrong (News That Will Drive You To Drink)

Get off the cross, someone needs the wood

Onward Christian Mujahideen!

Onward Christian Mujahideen!

On the book of faces, Tennessee’s Lt. Gov. Ron Ramsey:

The recent spike in mass shootings across the nation is truly troubling. Whether the perpetrators are motivated by aggressive secularism, jihadist extremism or racial supremacy, their targets remain the same: Christians and defenders of the West.

While this is not the time for widespread panic, it is a time to prepare. I would encourage my fellow Christians who are serious about their faith to think about getting a handgun carry permit. I have always believed that it is better to have a gun and not need it than to need a gun and not have it.

Our enemies are armed. We must do likewise.

Great idea. Let’s arm every self-aggrandized fetus-fondling god-botherer and tell them that they are the real targets of some gun-toting other. Let’s stroke their martyr complexes real good and see what happens.

Huckabee Wants To Sell More Books

Grifters Gotta Grift

Hello, My Name Is Stupid

Hello, My Name Is Stupid

Mike Huckabee, the alleged 2016 Goat Rodeo candidate on an extended book tour, couldn’t wait for the bodies to get cold before he tried to politicize the tragic slaughter of people in Oregon, you know, by claiming that The Kenyan Usurper is politicizing the tragic slaughter in Oregon…

“We hardly know any of the details about this horrific tragedy – What kind of gun was used? How did the shooter obtain it? What is the motive? Does the shooter have a history of mental illness? Was this an act of terror?”

Huckabee, does it matter what the gun was? It had bullets, it killed a bunch of people. How did the killer obtain it? – Again, does it matter, he obtained it and used it to kill a bunch of people. His motive, does it matter, he used a gun to kill a bunch of people? Did he have a history of mental illness, he still got his hands on a gun a used it to kill a bunch of people.

You want to offer a remedy, or would that be too… political?

“With few facts, Obama is quick to admittedly politicize this tragedy to advance his liberal, anti-gun agenda. For this president to make a political pronouncement is at best premature and at worst ignorantly inflammatory.”

As opposed to your political pronouncement, Huckabee, trailing in the polls, exploiting a bunch of dead people in Oregon? So how goes the sale of your latest book which has the word “Guns” in the title? A little marketing tie-in should see a bump in your sales figures.

Shame Them. Shame All Of Them


[I’m keeping this on top for a while because, well, it should be. Fresher posts below. — TG]

And so the NRA gets another baker’s dozen notches on their pistol grips.

Here’s the link to Open Secrets so you can see how much the NRA paid to each member of congress to continue the wholesale slaughter of our fellow citizens. The NRA spent less than $1M to buy virtually the entire GOP apparatus (and a handful of Dims). Did you know that it cost so little to buy the House?

Look up your representatives. Shame them. Shame them publicly. Shame them that they sold their souls to the devil for a handful of coins.

Today’s Endorsements!

The Hills Are Alive With The Sound of Slaughter

The Hills Are Alive With The Sound of Slaughter

Canadian-born latino and immigrant-hating southern white supremacist Senator Ted Cruz has received the much-coveted endorsement of Larry Pratt’s Gun Owners of America:

While there are many candidates in the race, Ted Cruz is the only one who has completed and returned the GOA presidential survey on the Second Amendment.

Wait, wut? That’s all it took?

Oh, crap:

“Ted Cruz has promised gun owners that, as President, he will remove the United States as a signatory nation to the anti-gun Arms Trade Treaty — a U.N. treaty that would fully implement a system of gun owner registration if ratified by the U.S. Senate.

“Ted Cruz has promised gun owners that he will repeal anti-gun Executive Orders that circumvent Congress and veto anti-gun legislation if it reaches his desk.

“As a U.S. Senator, Ted Cruz has demonstrated a willingness to fight for our Second Amendment rights. He is working with GOA on legislation to repeal the Obama Administration’s gun ban that is (and will) affect millions of military veterans and senior citizens.

“He has opposed efforts to reward millions of illegal aliens with citizenship and voting rights, given that the majority of them are anti-gunners who have ignored and flouted our laws.

“He has cosponsored legislation to allow concealed carry reciprocity for law-abiding gun owners. This legislation (S. 498) is of special importance to GOA members and activists. It is one of our chief priorities in Congress.

“This election season is quickly becoming the “year of the outsider.” And to that end, Ted Cruz has been able to “speak truth to power” as a member of the U.S. Senate.

“It was Senator Cruz who in July of 2015, blasted the Senate leadership for lying to fellow Republicans and the American people. Not only that, just a couple of months prior, he stood on the Senate floor and asked “what exactly is the difference between a Democratic and Republican majority?”

“Cruz blistered the leadership for failing to block the confirmation of President Obama’s executive and judicial nominees. In particular, Cruz noted that the Republican leadership could have — and should have — blocked the confirmation of anti-gun Loretta Lynch for Attorney General.

“It’s obvious that Senator Cruz follows the Constitution, not a political party.

“It was Senator Cruz who led the filibuster fight in 2013 against funding the anti-gun ObamaCare law, which will facilitate the disarmament of millions of gun owners once the law is fully implemented.

“While there are many problems with ObamaCare, Cruz recognizes how computerizing the medical records of millions of gun owners will allow the federal government to troll those names and add millions of honest gun owners to the NICS system — in the same way that the Obama Administration is currently using medical information to disarm military veterans, and proposing to do the same with senior citizens.

“Ted Cruz has promised to sign a bill to completely repeal ObamaCare as President. To that end, he has already introduced S. 339, which would repeal the health care law “as if such Act had not been enacted.”

“Finally, as we said above, one of Ted Cruz’ chief concerns as Senator has been the creeping “judicial tyranny” in our nation. We need a President who is going to rein in the courts by appointing judges who reject the notion that our Constitution is a “living and breathing” document that can be twisted to support any crackpot agenda that anti-gun liberals like Harry Reid or Nancy Pelosi advocate.”

So… it was the ad where he cooked bacon on his gun, right? that clinched the deal!