Your Claim Chowder Is Served

NotChimpy and Chimpy

NotChimpy and Chimpy

The Washington Examiner noticed the same thing we noticed:

“Quinnipiac pollsters asked respondents a simple, open-ended question: “What is the first word that comes to mind when you think of Jeb Bush?” Quinnipiac published a table of all the responses given five or more times. Here is the list of the top eight responses for Jeb, including the number of times people mentioned each particular word:

Bush — 136

family — 70

honest — 53

weak — 45

brother — 41

dynasty — 40

experience — 35

George — 28

By far, the first word that the most people thought of about Jeb Bush was not a word at all, but rather his last name. What’s the first thing you think of when you think about Jeb? Bush. And then the next most common response was “family.” And then “brother” and “dynasty” and “George.” When people see Jeb, they don’t think, this is an attractive candidate for president. They think “Bush.””

¡JEB! the Smartest Bush® done everything except renounce his citizenship (Hi Ted! Canada thanks you!) to disavow his family brand, and yet it keeps haunting him.

Some Fries With Your Stupid, ¡JEB! ?

NotChimpy and Chimpy

NotChimpy and Chimpy

George W. Bush to headline NYC fundraiser for Jeb a day before 9/11

OK, it’s absolutely clear that ¡JEB! the Smartest Bush® campaign is both trolling us and is some sort of performance art piece.

Seriously, does ¡JEB! have no advisors?

The Morning Quote

"Where are the rabbits, George?"

“Where are the rabbits, George?”

To me, the provisions in this [Iran] deal are like telling teenage boys, not only can you have the doors closed, but we got to shout up the stairs before we walk up the steps, ‘Hey, we’re coming up to check and see what you’re doing. Just want to give you advance notice.’ It makes no sense.

Sweet Baby Jeebus this man is stupid. Nuclear weapons and all the infrastructure that they include to build them are not a Playboy magazine quickly hidden under the mattress. You’d think that the search for the never-found WMDs of Chimpy’s Great Adventure would be sort of a reference point, wouldn’t ya?

The Tweet Of The Moment

I think ¡JEB! the Smartest Bush® was talking about noted War Criminal Dick ‘Blam-Blam’ Cheney’s stock portfolio? Or maybe we should count this as another strike. Dude gets one more swing at Iran and then he’s out.

One Lump of Stupid or Two, ¡JEB! ?

NotChimpy and Chimpy

NotChimpy and Chimpy

If there is one thing I would be doing with all my heart and soul if I were advising ¡JEB! the smartest Bush® it would be trying to NOT remind everyone that I am Generalissimo Chimpy McStagger’s kid brother:

Jeb Bush to assail Clinton, Obama on Iraq

Tiger Beat on the Potomac (thanks Charlie!) breathlessly tells us:

“Bush, who will speak at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley on Tuesday evening, will argue, as he often does on the campaign trail, that Clinton and Obama are to blame for the spread of ISIL across Iraq and Syria and for the broader instability in the Middle East.”

So Chimpy built it, but they should have destroyed it if they were any good at their jobs? Is that really your message?

Also/Too: good idea to give this speech with this message at the Reagan Library. Why not sell a few weapons to Iran while you are there, ¡JEB!?

Popcorn, anyone?
Deer Eating Popcorn

Who Has Your Back?

spy-vs-spy1The Electronic Frontier Foundation has posted their list of major Internet companies and service providers and which ones are defending your privacy from the over-reach of the federal government spying on us.

The chart is handy, but the analysis is better. Read the whole thing.

Kick Tom Cotton More, Please.

(Hat tip: unindicted co-conspirator GRS)

The Derp Is Strong In This One

One of them is a dummy and the other is Charlie McCarthy.

One of them is a dummy and the other is Charlie McCarthy.

“It’s not nation-building. We are assisting them in building their nation,” Rubio said of his vision for Iraq.

Glad Marco ‘Big Gulp’ Rubio, the Cold Warrior for a New Generation, and beloved grandson figure of Wingnuts over the age of 65 and under the age of death, could explain it so clearly for us.

(Business Insider)

The Evening Quote

NotChimpy and Chimpy

NotChimpy and Chimpy

“This is hard for me to be honest with you. I have to do the Heisman on my brother that I love, you know? This is not something I’m comfortable doing. But I’m my own person. I have my own life experience, and I will be successful if I’m a candidate when I share my heart and I talk about what I’ve done as governor of the state, where I cut taxes, reduced the state government workforce by 11 percent, moved the state to a AAA bond rating.”

NotChimpy, the Smart Bush®

Oh. Doing the Heisman. I mean, as far as I can tell.

One Lump of Stupid or Two, Grandpa Walnuts?

Poor Grandpa Walnuts, he stepped on his dick again: