Pop Quiz!

The Smoking Gun

and…

The Smoking Gun

The Smoking Gun has the scoop of the day on Chimpy McStagger’s artistic endeavors, and it seems clear that he is as good as artist as he was a preznint.

Now, aside from the delicious irony that the man who made email tapping and wire tapping legal as part of his legacy, getting his electronic mail hacked, er, taken without a court order, well, I’m just as shocked as the next person.

For 1.34 points towards you final grade, please give us the art criticism his work deserves, and for a bonus point, what he should add to the paintings to improve in his still life. For instance, I think the bathtub portrait, he needs to add some fart bubbles to capture his jejeune Je ne sais quois.

In the comments, please.

0 thoughts on “Pop Quiz!

  1. That tapered torso is an egregious example of artistic license.

    He also forgot to include the rubber duckies in the bathtub, because you KNOW they’re in there.

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  2. I’m wondering who he is showering with in the top photo, he must have to scrub the Presidential back. We see W’s face in the mirror, but the angle is wrong for this to be a self-portrait. I think there is a secret service agent close to retirement who weeps himself to sleep each night.

    Also, he’s missing a toe in the bottom painting, should be 11 of them.

    Also Also, instead of the rubber duckies as Bruce suggests, I’m going with plastic ships and subs.

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  3. Well, does it matter who is in what mirror or if he has taken license with his fat belly? Really? I mean the Asshat is painting by numbers (assume his wife reads them to him correctly) maybe he got it wrong.

    RIP Chippy, get a new box of crayons and keep coloring, you murdering shrimp.

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  4. I dunno…. there is something sublime about them. An innocence, a yearning for privacy, a desire to wrap oneself in the moist warmth of a bath to soothe the troubled mind. It’s a classic representation of man’s desire to return to the womb.

    Oh who am I kidding? They’re representational drivel. But if they keep him occupied, I say paint on!

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  5. I agree with the writers at the Washington Free Beacon: “The paintings demonstrate a command of line and color that is rarely seen in the modern-day “art” world. Former President George W. Bush appears to be influenced by such painters as Edgar Degas and Édouard Manet. The portraits also clearly capture the personality of their subject.”

    At least the last sentence…

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  6. Looks like Lil’ George is stepping up as the next Painter Of Light™. A glimpse into the unbearable lightness of his being.

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  7. Looks like he got all of the black velvet covered with paint. The bathtub needs Barney holding aces and eights, smoking a cigar…

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  8. I hope he wasn’t drinking when he painted these because, damn are they dull.
    Try some JD next time you pick up a brush.

    He must be soooo board.

    In either case they’ve made it on to my phones screen saver.

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  9. Historians sometimes speculate about what would be different had Hitler found success as as architect or if Fidel Castro had been a slightly better baseball player (he nearly made the pros).
    Perhaps if shrub had found his inner artist earlier in life…

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  10. I imagined Chimpy singing ” I’m gonna wash that man right outta my life”

    Look it’s very early here in Australia.

    Norman Bates ?.

    I got nothing.

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